Page 182 of The Head Game

It was achingly difficult to lose the game and his career but, oh God, to lose Nico. That was the worst of it. How could August walk away?

But he had to. Because he couldn’t do it again. If Daniel’s words had hurt him, how would it feel to watch Nico lose interest in him?

Nico had said he wanted to stick together but he was so casual about it. It was clearly something fun for now, but August knew what would happen in time.

August couldn’t fall deeper and deeper in love with Nico only to have the rug pulled out from under him when Nico grew bored with him. Off to chase the next thrilling adventure in his life.

It would hurt now but it would hurt so much more later if August kept going. If he kept pretending.

August fumbled with the ring on his finger, sliding it off and staring down at it, sparkling in the weak winter light.

A tear slipped down August’s cheek, then another and he didn’t know what he was crying for.

He’d known this was coming. All of it. He’d known it and it shouldn’t hurt so much, not when he’d been prepared but it did. Far more than he’d imagined.

Tomorrow, two days from now … in a week, he’d pick himself up.

He’d sit down and make a new plan for his life but he couldn’t do it now. Could only sit there, heart aching, and wondering what his future held.

Miss Muffins chirped again and he glanced over to see her perched on his suitcase.

“Nice try,” he said softly. “That’s not going to keep me from leaving.”

But she ignored him, curling up on it with a flick of her tail and closing her eyes.

August’s phone buzzed and he almost didn’t check it, assuming it was Nico, but it buzzed again and he realized it was a call from Jules.

“Hey,” he choked out.

“Oh no. How bad?” Julius said immediately.

“Two years.”

Julius was silent a moment. “That’s better than we expected, right?”

“I guess.” August sighed heavily. “They say I can reapply after, but …”

“Ahh. You don’t think they’d ever want you again?”

“Why would they?” August stared out the window at the leaden Toronto sky. “No one will trust me after this.”

“August …”

“I’m untrustworthy,” he said.

He let out a bitter little laugh. It wasn’t funny at all but it might be the first time in his life anyone had thought that.

“Okay, that’s it. I’m coming to Toronto,” Julius said grimly. “You’re at Nico’s place, right?”

“Yeah, but don’t bother. I’m all packed.”

“What?”

“I’m going to head home. We might as well end this. He can afford to hire people to look after him until he’s cleared to live alone, and really, otherwise, I can’t imagine why we’d need to stay together now.”

“Uhh, maybe because you’re ridiculously in love?”

August tilted his head, staring up at the ceiling. “What does that have to do with anything?”

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