Page 58 of Through the Wicked Wood

I close my eyes as his words sink into me. Swallowing down the guilt that I get to live this life, with him, while they didn’t get to live at all. Opening my eyes again, I trace my fingers down the lines of his jaw, the dark stubble now more profound since leaving Loxley. Over the lines of his full ups, across the bridge of his nose.

“Well let’s just hope they make the same mistake twice,” I whisper, “because any other life without you in it would be rather dull without all that talking.”

He chuckles, his firm hands wrapping around me, his mouth finding mine and kissing me deeply again. And again, and again.

* * *

Heading back to camp, I cling to Sorin’s arm as we weave through the darkness. A flurry of crows flies gracefully overhead, their silence more menacing than the caws that typically accompany them. The flickering light from the campfire in the distance sets my nerves on edge. Of course, everyone is still up. I imagine Galen’s look of disgust as Sorin and I walk back together. I shake the thought from myself as Sorin wraps his hand in mine.

“You’re disappearing again.”

Startled, I glance up at him, his eyes meeting mine through the darkness. “Just in my own head, as usual,” I say, keeping my tone casual but Sorin’s grip on my hand tightens anyway. His thumb traces the back of my hand as he leads us towards camp. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but stops himself short, pulling me closer as we walk through the woods.

Approaching our camp, Alaric and Ruse pop their heads up in unison. The thundering wag of Alaric’s tail is laughable compared to Ruse’s stoic demeanor. I nod in their direction which has the two of them lowering their guard, settling in next to the fire.

“Well, you’ve been gone awhile.” Jarek draws out the words, slow and intentional. Sam nudges his side with her elbow, and he flinches before releasing his typical boom of laughter. Biting my bottom lip to hide a smile, Sorin and I sit side by side, his arm draping heavily around my shoulders.

“So, tomorrow’s the day.” Galen’s voice is distant, and I hardly notice him perched opposite of us against a giant pine tree. His hood is pulled up, concealing his face, arms crossed tightly across his chest. His words hang thickly in the air. Tomorrow we’ll face the Wicked Woods, and from there our fates will be sealed.

“We leave at first light,” Sorin says, playing with the ends of my braid. “We’ll want to make it there before dusk. That stretch of the forest is not one I like to venture into without daylight.” A shiver courses down my spine in anticipation.

“Will you tell us what happened?” I ask Sam, feeling bold. “I understand if you don’t want to…I just would like to know what we can expect.”

Her eyes dart to Sorin, his body tensing against mine at my question.

“That’s the thing though, Enchantress,” Sam says, her voice tired. A sense of sadness also plagues her voice, and I immediately feel guilty I dragged her back to a place she clearly despises. “No passage through the Wicked Woods is ever the same,” she continues. Tossing a bundle of sticks into the fire, she crouches near the flames to warm her hands. “What Sorin and I experienced all those years ago could be completely different from what we’ll experience tomorrow.” She leans back and settles in next to Jarek again, her eyes directed at me through the flames. “What happened with Sorin and I—”

“That’s enough.” Sorin’s voice is low, quiet. A whisper that holds the power to still even the flames. Sam and Sorin stare at each other for a moment. A silent exchange of words only siblings would understand before Sam breaks and lets out a breath.

“All I’m saying,” she continues drawing out the last word, “is whatever fear you have in your heart, she will find it and she will use it against you. That much I know will be the same.” A few beats of silence hang around us until she mumbles under her breath, “I hope all this is worth it.” My heart sinks and the guilt I felt earlier about bringing her here is now justified. She doesn’t want to be here, and because of Sorin and I, she is. And for whatever reason, Sorin is still hiding something from me.

We told you not to trust him.

“Sam, this will help you get your magick,” I start, ignoring the voices that have returned in my head, but before I can say anything further, she stands and walks toward her tent, leaving the four of us in silence.

“She’ll be okay,” Jarek whispers. “She’s just afraid. And when Sam’s afraid her only response is anger.”

A response I can relate to all too well.

The sudden hop to my feet has the wolves alert and jumping from their sleeping positions.

“Where are you going?” Sorin glances up at me from the ground then over to the wolves who are now loom over him. I give a quick shake of my head to let them know I don’t need their help and head towards Sam’s tent.

“I need to speak with her,” I say over my shoulder as I pass by the fire.

“We’re supposed to train,” Galen says, but I don't care about that right now. All I care about is making sure Sam is okay.

Hovering at the entrance of the canvas tent, I’m unsure of what to say or how to approach her.

“Are you coming in or not?” Sam says through the small opening. Taking a quick breath, I duck into the tent. She’s wrapped up in her cloak, laying on her back and peering at the ceiling of the tent. She doesn’t make any attempt to look at me as I drop down next to her. We lie like that for a while.

“When Sorin’s mother passed,” Sam whispers, her voice barely audible against the fierceness of the wind. Rolling, I face her. “Agnes and my father, William, adopted him without a moment's hesitation. He was young, you know, and my mother made it her mission to care for him. To make sure that despite his hardships he would know what a mother’s love felt like.” My stomach dips, and as much as I don’t want to, my mind wanders to my own mother. How she also took in Cade when his mother passed.

“She wanted him to know what it was like to have a family despite all odds,” Sam continues. “In doing so, Agnes inadvertently left me out of a lot of things. I know she didn’t mean to, but it doesn’t change the fact that she did. He was so young, so fragile after everything. All of her focus went to caring for him. Making sure he was okay. We’re only three years apart, but I felt such a massive responsibility to take care of him as well. Even now, everything we work for is for him.” In the dim light of the tent, she bites her lip. “It’s not that I don’t want to help, because I most certainly do. And Sorin is the best person I know. He cares about this kingdom..about change. It’s just…” Her voice trails as she rubs her fingers against her temples.

“You just want to be a part of the initial conversation,” I say, mimicking my own words to Sorin after the guard in Copenspire.

She smiles, though it’s weak, tired. “Exactly.”

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