Page 19 of The Surrender

It’s all true, but he neglected one thing. One significant thing that Quintessa has taught me about more than anyone else.

He didn’t say the heart.

I close my eyes and pass into the sweet relief of my subconscious, preferring those nightmares to my waking one of wondering: do I even have a heart?

14

In the dark with a stranger.

QUINTESSA

My scream turns into a yelping gurgle when the ground slams into me. I fall, tumbling onto my side, but to my astonishment, I register how much harder I should have fallen. Above my head, the surface is a small “O”. The realization strikes me as I gaze down at the gown and how the feathers themselves hold some small amount of magic from Kyan’s realm: the realm of angels. They cushioned my fall, so I hovered before hitting the ground.

The ground is covered in skulls and bones.

Raw fear strikes me with the force of a battering ram. My breaths thunder in my ears because every skull and bone in this massive cavern is small. The horror is so palpable, I can taste it on my tongue. My teeth chatter, and I scramble against the wall, pressing my body against it, only to slip on the slick ice at my back. Tumbling, I splay my hands to catch myself, but they collapse onto a pile of children’s bones, rattling them.

My lungs burn from how hard I’m pushing out ragged breaths.

The entire cavern is a dumping ground for the remains of children.

At first, I sidle up against the wall as far as I may go, ignoring the icy chill against my spine because a deeper one spreads into my blood. Working to steel my nerves against the oncoming panic attack, I close my eyes and take deep breaths. Despite the eerie environs, I take a few moments to pay attention to the scents around me - the pungent smell of bone powder, of rot hanging in the air to clot with the aroma of frozen water. Eyes still closed, I memorize the feeling of the gown feathers and the cloak that warms the gooseflesh on my skin.

My breathing echoes within the cavern. I open my eyes, chest tightening as I find my strength to study the cavern and search for any exits. The only shaft of light comes from the opening far above, which casts a halo around me. Everything else is dim and descends to unending darkness.

At least I can still taste the honey-sweet dream fruit on my tongue. Adrenaline surges into my veins when I remember what Oliver Shift told me: the tribulation seeds! Scrambling into the sack at my side, I retrieve the seeds and waste no time in cracking a few between my teeth, wrinkling my nose at the bitter taste, then gulping them down.

Seconds pass with nothing happening. I swing my head in all directions, almost expecting Kyan to pop up like a djinn before me, only to chastise myself for appropriating an angel with a djinn. All my thoughts are scrambled, toppling over one another in my mind. Overwhelmed by how far down I am and uncertain of how to make it out of here, I start to curl into a ball and release the dam of rising tears...

Until a fresh warmth blossoms in my chest. Peering down, I gasp. My chest tingles from the incandescent glow fanning out from my heart region. The radiance is strong enough to illuminate much of the cavern—enough for me to make out the exits!

“Dark place indeed!” I marvel, internally praising Steward Shift.

Hurrying to my feet, I approach the nearest gap in the ice. From what I can tell, it’s smaller than the one on the other side, just enough of a sizable gap for me to squeeze through. The glow from my chest casts a sheen upon the ice, kindling it to glimmer. I part my lips, admiring the sight but force myself to quicken my pace. I have no idea how long the tribulation seeds will remain active with their glow.

Doing my best not to imagine what sort of creature that feeds on the bodies of children, of babies, may be down here with me, I push my form through the thick slit in the ice.

“Savage-gah!” I cry out and exhale deeply to release all my air and shove hard, falling onto a wide rocky pathway.

A cold, wet droplet splashes onto my cheek. I glance up. Stalactites catch the light glamouring my chest to gleam like crystal chandeliers. On both sides of me, the glow of the tribulation seeds reflects upon the crystalline walls of pure ice. So lustrous and enchanting, I nearly forget the dark ruins of baby bones behind me.

At least there’s a straight and open course before me.

Flat puzzle piece-like stones forge a crude path for my footsteps. As I lurch forward, I pass by walls of frost and long icicles like gleaming sword blades that wink at me whenever my shining chest crosses them.

Despite my hopes that the stony path will lead me somewhere, my hopes deflate in my chest and pull down my shoulders. Shivering, I wrap the cloak around myself, grateful for the warmth. If I didn’t have Kyan’s feathery gift, my body may have shut down from the cold. Then again, I am a blood binder. All it should take is a little slice from any of these icicles to heal me.

After what seems like hours of wandering, the heaviness begins to fade into panic. The only openings I’ve discovered have led to more dumping grounds with those baby bones. Not a single track anywhere.

And I’m running out of tribulation seeds.

Soon, I’ll have nothing to light my path, nothing to protect me from the all-consuming darkness. Nausea churns in my stomach, and I try to quicken my pace, only to slip on the ice. I fall hard on my side, knowing a bruise is already forming.

What will Kyan do once he discovers me missing? Is he already out looking for me? Last time, Jinx led me to the Hag’s tunnel to find Drago, but will he lead the kings to where I fell into the tunnel? I rake my nails into my scalp, chastising myself for leaving the area, wondering if I should have just stayed for help to arrive. Jinx is very lucky that he’s so adorable.

Scrubbing a hand down my face, I take some deep breaths to steady myself and get to my feet. At first, I try to hug the wall, but too many icicles prod my back. Instead, I stay on the uneven stone path as much as possible. If I move too quickly, I’ll slip again.

When the light in my chest begins to fade, I let it go as dim as possible before cracking two more in my mouth. Only two left. The lesser the seeds, the lesser the light. But it’s enough to halo a little glow no more than three feet before me. I move slowly.

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