Page 72 of What Comes After

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Theo

I was in a state of shock.

There was no other way to describe it.

I’d just dropped Devyn off at her apartment, and nothing had ever felt so awful and final in all my life.

Here I’d been thinking everything was great, that we were getting back bits and pieces of the friendship we used to have so many years ago, and I was wrong.

I didn’t even understand how it was possible that I never knew all that she’d been feeling. I didn’t know what she’d been struggling with, and I certainly didn’t know that she believed we lived in separate worlds.

Everything came as a surprise, but now that she’d shared how she truly felt, I had to wonder if perhaps she’d have done better as an actor than I did.

How could she have hidden those thoughts all these years? Every time I visited, every time I called or texted, Devyn never gave me the slightest inclination that she felt the way she did.

Now, I had no choice but to drive away from her apartment and head back to the place I’d hoped she would have wanted to stay and build a life with me.

As I made my way back there, all I could manage to do was ask myself one question.

How had I gotten it all wrong?

SEVENTEEN

Theo

The last thing I ever thought I’d need at my age was my mom’s advice.

Or, at least, I never thought I’d need it in this capacity.

Because I didn’t think it was possible that I’d reach this point in my life and be experiencing girl troubles.

While I could have attempted to figure this out on my own, something I’d been trying to do for days now, I knew my mom would be able to provide me with solid advice.

And apparently, that was the thing about parents. It didn’t matter how old their children got; the good ones would always be there to listen whenever their kids needed them.

I had no doubt my father would have been just as willing to help me, but since he was working, and I couldn’t wait any longer, my mom was going to have to fill the role by herself this afternoon.

Yes, my father still worked, even though I’d made several attempts to retire him. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate my willingness to help them out. He did. But he was a proud man, a man who believed it was his responsibility to take care of his family. Even when I came home over the years and we’d all go out to dinner, he always paid. Plus, he was just the kind of guy who couldn’t sit around doing nothing all day.

So, he worked.

And it was the very opposite of what I’d done over the last couple of days. I’d spent that time trying to wrap my head around the conversation I’d had with Devyn. I’d been unsuccessful.

Truth be told, I had believed we were in a good place, a place where I was working toward eventually revealing the truth about my feelings to her. And in an instant, she ended it.

Now, I was lost. Confused.

I hadn’t really slept well in days.

If I thought it had been difficult to sleep when she was in the guest bedroom, I was a fool.

At least she’d been there. At least I knew I’d wake up in the morning and see her beautiful face and hear her sweet voice. At least I knew she’d be there at night before bed.

Now, I had nothing, and I was feeling as hopeless as I had when I’d gotten the call that Devyn was in the hospital fighting for her life.

Would this woman ever be mine?