Page 68 of Haze

Cade blows a raspberry. “Does that statement usually involve bloodshed?”

I shrug. “Usually. What do you have against knocking a few heads in now and again?”

“I made a promise to the Luna that I’d be better than the old ways. I would follow the course my cousins and I had always said we would.” Cade gestures to me. “But now I’m understanding why sometimes bashing a few heads together might be easier.”

“There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to be the bad guy, but at some point, you have to put your foot down and quit expecting wolves to get along civilly. We’re wild at our cores, and that wild we can’t control must be met with violence,” I advise him.

My phone starts to ring, so I fish it from my pocket.

I look at Cade. “Do you know anyone whose number ends in 4021?”

“Yeah, Deacon.” Cade reaches in his pocket and pulls out his phone. He shakes his head, indicating he doesn’t have any missed messages.

“Hello?” I answer my phone.

“Cool, hey, it’s Deacon. Can you tell my idiot brother he forgot to bring back dinner?” Deacon says quickly. “Also, since he forgot. You should come back up here so he and I can go get food. I’ll bring you some back.”

“Sure. I’ll be right up.” I look at my phone only for Deacon to have already hung up on me.

I do a quick hit of save and keep him in my contacts.

“Translation: your mate is awake, and she wants you but is too frustrated to say it herself. You good to do a full twenty-four hours here?” Cade translates Deacon’s gibberish.

How the hell did Cade come to that conclusion?

But I’m already out of the chair. I pause. Pulling my gaze from the door, I draw it back to him and purse my lips. Do I have to ask to be dismissed?

Cade shakes his head and, with a laugh, seems to understand my dilemma. “The fuck are you waiting for? Her to change her mind?”

With long strides, I walk as fast as I can without actually running back to Lena’s room.

Deacon just misses running into me on his way out the door. He salutes and heads off without another word.

Lena’s curled up in her bed, facing away from the door. She doesn’t pick her head up when I come in.

“Kathleen,” I call, but she doesn’t move.

I sit behind her on the bed, running my hand up and down her arm.

“I’m sorry,” Lena whispers.

How can an apology break your heart so much?

I shuffle and lie down, wrapping my arms around her. Lena wiggles, fighting for a moment before she settles in. Everything about her is somber and sick with grief. I want to take it all from her, to pull her sadness into me and protect her from ever knowing this hurt again; I would keep all her pain as my own. There’s nothing I wouldn’t shield her from.

Chapter 23

Lena

Through the dull haze of the morning light, I wake up to find Finn still sleeping behind me. His body keeps me pleasantly warm despite the cool temperature of the lab. But, more than that, his presence is comforting. At least a part of him has connected with me. No one chooses to sleep in a hospital bed for fun, even more so when they’re as large as Finn and trying to share it.

The question remains, however, do I want him to want me?

My eyes feel heavy, and after a few more minutes, I can no longer keep running the pro-con list in my head.

* * *

Finn was gone when I woke up this morning. It’s for the best. I shouldn’t be surprised he was willing to get away from me.