Page 103 of West Bound

Dozens of texts just like this one have been sent over the last twenty-four hours, trying to get Vivian to just meet with me for a few minutes. But she refuses to reply so I’ve had to resort to other means in which to get her alone.

I walk through the quiet halls of the Wranglers executive offices, looking for the door Bishop told me was CeCe’s office. I find it and see it slightly ajar, voices coming from inside.

“I don’t understand why we couldn’t just wait for her in the parking lot like we always do?” I recognize Vivian’s voice and let out a sigh of relief.

“I told you. I needed to make a phone call and it’s too difficult to hear when thousands of rowdy fans are walking around. Geez, mom. Get off my back,” Bishop jokes and I stop just outside of the door, listening for the perfect time to make my presence known.

“Well then, when are you going to make this very important phone call? We’ve been sitting here for fifteen minutes and you still haven’t even looked at your phone.”

I move stealthily to peer through the small crack in the door and see Vivian sitting in one chair with her back to me. Bishop is leaning against CeCe’s desk and looks up to see me standing here and gives me a crooked smile.

“I think now is the perfect time for me to make that phone call,” he says and stands from where he leans.

I take that moment to push the door open and walk in. Vivian turns to see me and before she can protest, Bishop hauls ass out of the room and closes the door behind him.

“Bishop, you’re no longer my favorite!” she yells and I hear him laugh from the other side. “What are you doing here, Phoenix? If I wanted to see you, I would’ve responded to one of your hundreds of texts.” She crosses her arms and the move makes her small breasts push higher in her low-cut white blouse and I just want to rip it from her body like I’m the fucking Hulk.

“I’m sorry I had to be sneaky like this, but it’s really important you listen to me. Just give me five minutes and then I’ll leave you alone if you want me to. Please?” I look at her with some much hope in my eyes that she’s got to see how much I need her.

She studies me for a moment then relents, “fine. But five minutes and then I have to go give Bishop a double wet willy because it’s either that or I murder him, and I don’t look good in orange. Stripes, yes, but orange clashes with my hair.” She flips her hair over her shoulder and gives me a stern face.

“I have something for you to listen to. Just don’t say anything until you’ve heard it all. Okay?” I ask and she nods, skeptically. “Here,” I tell her, handing my phone over and pressing play on the voice recording.

I watch as her face runs through a myriad of emotions the longer she listens to the recording. Boredom, thinking this isn’t going to make her change her mind. Confusion when she hears Manny talking about wanting to keep her away from me. And unbridled rage when he tells me that she should’ve been his along with my pitching position.

When the recording shuts off, I pocket my phone and wait for her to say something. She stands, then sits, then stands and walks to the other side of CeCe’s desk. Her hands rest flat against the table and her head drops between her slumped shoulders.

I can tell this news is sending her into a tailspin. I want so badly to reach out and pull her into my arms, but I know I have to give her some space to process. But how long do I need to wait is what I want to know.

“I’m sorry he did this to you,” she says, her voice hoarse with emotion.

I take a few steps towards her then slow as I inch closer like I’m approaching a skittish animal.

“I’m sorry that he did this to us. But now that we know we can move on.” I reach out–finally–and pull her into my arms, but she’s stiff and unreceptive.

“I don’t know that this changes much,” she tells me.

My heart stops and I swear the world around me stops, too. She can’t possibly think that this isn’t a total game changer for us. This changes everything.

“Of course it does, Vivian. How can you say that?”

She pushes away from me and sinks down into the chair. “Because eventually we would’ve ended, one way or another. Something would have torn us apart. This sucked but at least it was sooner than later before we were both in over our heads.”

“Before we were over our heads? Are you kidding me, Vivian? I tattooed you on my fucking body. You asked me to move in with you. I told you I love you! I’ve never said that to anyone. I am so beyond being in over my head. Right now I’m drowning without you.” I’ve pulled her up from the chair and have taken to holding her in my arms like she’s the buoy keeping my head above water.

I rest my head in the crook of her neck and hear the smallest sniffle. I kiss her neck, her chin, her jaw, until my lips are pressed tightly against hers. A mixture of the sweetness that is only Vivian and the saltiness from her tears coats our lips. She moans and I melt remembering how she sounded, how she felt, the last time I had her in my arms.

I take her face in my hands and deepen our kiss, and pour everything I have into her. “God, I missed you,” I murmur against her lips.

Her hands cover mine and she slowly pulls away. Her bright eyes blink and stare back at me, but I don’t see what I so long to see in them.

Vivian’s demeanor begins to change and I know this is my last opportunity to push the door open before she closes it. “Don’t say it,” I plead.

“I don’t know that I’m built for a relationship, Phoenix. This, us, just happened so fast. You just bulldozed your way into my heart and I don’t even know if that’s what I want.”

I release her and step away. “We’re back to this bullshit, again? You’re seriously going to stand there and tell me that you weren’t the happiest you’ve ever been when we were wrapped up in each other every night? That the worst nights were the ones we spent apart. Look at me and tell me you were happier running through a string of forgettable men than with me, the man who worships your mind, body, and soul. Tell me some other man can love you better, because I’ll call you a liar if you do.”

Tears fall from her eyes and she bats them away like they’ve wronged her. “I need to think. Can you just give me some time?”