Page 106 of Dark & Dreadful Brutes

“I told you in Jirev that even if we couldn’t be mates, I wanted you as my life partner. We’re fated, Lae. To me, that’s forever. Even if we weren’t, I’ve come to enjoy fighting with you too much to go back to sleeping alone. I thought you understood that, or I would’ve made it clear long ago. I’ve been giving you the space you demanded because you’re not certain—not because I have any doubts.”

My throat swelled, and my eyes stung.

“I think I knew that,” I admitted softly, not meeting his gaze as I continued playing with his hair. “It was just easier to believe you were pushing me away than to accept that I might want more.”

“I’m not trying to make your life harder.” He adjusted our position, and his lips brushed my throat once, and then again.

“I know. I think maybe I am, unintentionally. I’m not sure how to live life anymore, now that I’m free. It was always just about survival before.”

“Your strength got you here. Now, you have to learn how to trust yourself.” His lips brushed my throat again. “And me.”

“I already trust you. I’m the problem here.” My lips curved in a sad smile.

“Stop fighting with yourself, then. If I ask you what you want, what’s your gut reaction? Without thinking, doubting, or questioning?”

“You,” I whispered.

His chest rumbled against mine. “Good answer.”

I laughed softly, and he lifted his head from my hair, brushing a few strands off my face. His expression was soft, and achingly-sweet. “Can I stop giving you space?”

“Yes.”

His lips captured mine, and he kissed me slowly. Intimately. His cock was still buried inside me, hard and thick and perfect, but the kiss wasn’t about pleasure.

It was about connection. About hope, peace, and veil, maybe even a little bit of love. Not that I was anywhere near ready to pull out that word.

He released me after a moment, then rested his forehead against mine. His eyes closed, and mine did too.

I almost felt his mood change as his grip shifted, going from holding me securely against him to holding me like he was afraid I’d leave him.

A few moments passed before he spoke quietly. “I killed my sister today.”

My smile faded, and I wrapped my arms around him tighter. “I know. I’m sorry. You didn’t have another choice.”

“Elwynne or Orvay would’ve done it for me. I just…” he let out a harsh breath. “She was my responsibility.”

Ravv had said that his crown was heavy, and I knew that was the truth in many ways. More than he’d even shown me.

“Your people respect you fiercely because you do the hardest things yourself. I respect you fiercely for that. Most kings would hand out the worst tasks to the people they trust, but you don’t ask anything of anyone that you wouldn’t do yourself. You should be proud of that, even if it’s shitty today, tomorrow, and next week. You might not want to be king, but that doesn't make you any less incredible at it.”

He grimaced. “Don’t lie to me. Tell me I’m a miserable asshole.”

“You’re an asshole, but a good one.” I pulled him closer, and he didn’t protest the motion.

“If you’re trying to make me hard for you, it’s already worked.”

I laughed. “You’re still inside me. I know you haven’t gone soft.” I brushed a kiss to his cheek. “Tell me about your parents.”

“Tell me about yours,” he countered.

My smile vanished, and I tried to slip out of his grasp. He helped me slide off his cock, but held me in his arms even more tightly afterward.

“If I was as good a man as you say, you would’ve already trusted me with their story, whatever it is. You think I haven’t noticed you lost in your memories? I see flashes of your past through our bond, Lae. I keep waiting for you to trust me enough to tell me.”

My throat swelled, and I tried to pull away.

He held me tighter, gripping me to his chest. “You know that Ria tried to kill my parents. It was in the middle of the night, following an eclipse. Everyone was exhausted. I went to her room to see if she wanted to go for another round of drinks, to buy a few more hours until the alcohol sickness set in, but she was gone. When I tracked her scent to my parents’ bedroom, I found that she’d tied them to their headboard and was torturing them, slowly. Relishing their pain.”

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