Page 100 of Dark & Dreadful Brutes

I needed to fix that, though.

He rubbed up against Gleam’s side after Ravv dismounted to speak with a few of the fae gathered.

“I’m sorry,” I said quietly to Coarse.

“For what?” he sounded grumpy again, but I didn’t mind.

“It doesn’t seem like you wanted to be bonded to anyone, so I’m sorry for trapping you in this,” I explained.

He was silent for a moment.

A long, long moment.

“I suppose it could seem that way,” he finally said.

We started walking, staying at the back of the group with Ravv and Gleam at his command.

“There are many idorr who despair at their lack of a bond. I focused all of that energy on my mate instead, so I wasn’t prepared when our souls connected. I’m uncertain how to care for and protect my female while also being your companion. I have lived a long time without needing to worry about that.”

That made sense, and I didn’t blame him for it.

“I’m sorry. It’s weird for me, too. I hoped that bonding to an idorr could help give me some sense of stability when the eclipse separates me from Ravv, so I think maybe we both just need to adjust our expectations.”

“I have made it clear to the king that our connection outranks his to you, and he will face my wrath if he hurts you,” Coarse growled into my mind. “A mate comes before a companion, but you are not his mate.”

The words stung, but I needed to hear them.

My eyes burned a bit, too.

“He’s the first sliver of stability I’ve had since…” I trailed off, closing my eyes and taking a shaky breath in. “Since my family died. There was a fire on my thirteenth birthday, when my magic came in. I woke up surrounded by flames. They died—they all died. The ones we didn’t lose to the fire, we lost to the king’s men’s swords.”

“You were a child, Laeli. Children can never control their magic. Don’t carry the guilt for something you never would’ve done on purpose. Blame the fates or the gods for giving you that magic, but never yourself.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond to that, but his certainty lightened the heaviness weighing on my chest. “Thank you for saying that.”

“You need to believe it,” he grumbled at me.

My lips curved upward in a small, sad smile. “If only it were that easy. I don’t know how to make myself believe it any more than I know how to make myself stop relying on Ravv.”

“The king is generally a safe male to rely on,” the idorr admitted. “I trust him with my female’s life more than I trust her with it.”

I snorted. “That’s terrible.”

“Gleamingeyes knows how protective I am of her. My trust in the king has nothing to do with her, and everything to do with him. He is an honorable male.”

“You’re not making it any easier for me to come up with excuses to put distance between us,” I said with a sigh. “He might be honorable, but it seems like he has no desire to stay with me after the eclipse breaks our bond.”

“I doubt that’s true. Have you asked him? I’ve never seen him care for a woman the way he cares for you. Your bond is not as meaningless to him as you think.”

My throat swelled. “Maybe I’ll talk to him about it.” I changed the subject, before I got too emotional. “Have you and Gleam had any cubs yet?”

“No. We had no desire to become parents during a war. Perhaps in the future, we will decide to try.”

I respected that, tremendously.

If I had kids, it wouldn’t be for a long, long time. I’d need a fae lifespan to make it possible at all.

We continued speaking as we ran, covering ground on the glacier as we headed to the city of mated fae. I’d been nervous about talking to Coarse, but I was so damn glad that I’d pushed past it. We weren’t so different after all.

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