Page 30 of Courageous Hearts

“Okay, so let’s parse through it,” Grant says. “It’s a man?”

“No. They’re nonbinary.”

“Okay,” my brother replies evenly. “Are you or are you not attracted to them?”

“I’m not sure,” I admit. “I like them. They’re sweet and bold at times but a little withdrawn at others. They’re easy to talk to, and I always look forward to seeing them. And they do draw my eye, but…”

“But what?”

“I worry that might be for the wrong reasons,” I answer quietly.

“Can you explain that?” Grant asks, sounding as if his mouth is half-full from whatever he’s eating for lunch.

How do I explain my primary concern? “I worry that I might find them attractive because they frequently dress in a feminine manner and wear makeup.”

Grant seems to mull that over. “You think you’re attracted to their femininity, and as such, you worry that’s offensive because they’re not a woman.”

“Well, yeah,” I say, glad Grant could articulate my thoughts much better than I seemed able to.

“Women don’t own femininity,” my brother says, giving me pause. “It’s a social construct more than anything. If this person…”

“Bo,” I fill in.

“If Bo likes expressing their femininity, I can’t imagine they’d take offense at being appreciated for it. But, of course, I can’t speak for them. Maybe that’s a conversation to have with Bo,” Grant adds, chewing again.

“Maybe,” I mutter, even though I’d much rather figure this out myself before approaching Bo. What if I’m wrong? What if I make things weird between us?

“Is there some other reason you’re hesitant to go after them? Do they…have parts you’re uncomfortable with?”

Leave it to Grant to dive right into the heart of the matter.

“The only reason I’m going to talk to you about this is because you’re my brother, and I trust you,” I say, a hard edge to my tone.

“Understood,” Grant says.

“Normally, I would never disclose someone’s private information like their parts, whether that person is a friend, someone I’m dating, or whatever else.”

“I know that, James,” he says steadily. “You’ve always been respectful of the women you’ve dated, however briefly.” I ignore the parting barb. “I won’t say a word, and if you don’t feel right talking about it, that’s fine, too.”

“No, I need to,” I say, scrubbing my hand along my jaw. “I need to talk to someone about this because I’m having trouble figuring it out myself.”

“Okay,” Grant says. “In that case, thank you for trusting me.”

“Always,” I breathe out. Grant may get on my nerves sometimes, as I suspect the people we love most have the unique ability to do, but I’ll always trust him. “They do have parts I’m not intimately familiar with.”

My mind flashes back to those red, lacy briefs. To the outline of Bo’s soft cock, which I hadn’t let myself think much about before. I tried not to, instead focusing on the curve of their ass, something that felt safe. Less dissimilar to what I’m used to.

“Does that bother you?” Grant asks.

“Honestly, I don’t know.” I feel like a broken record. “I’ve never…tried. But what if I do, and I find out I don’t like it?”

If I tried with Bo—if that was something they’d even be interested in—and I found out their anatomy was a deal-breaker? I’d feel like the worst sort of person.

I’d be crushed if I hurt Bo like that.

Grant hums thoughtfully. “I think if it were simply lust, I’d tell you not to treat this person like an experiment.” There’s a pause. “But.”

“But?”

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