Page 30 of Liv Parrish

“I don’t know how to do that. I …”

“I could help, if you’ll let me. I want to help, Liv. All you have to do is say yes.” But I don’t say anything, at least not right away. I walk over to the window and stare out at the city below, people rushing around, living their best lives. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m the only one who’s stuck between wanting and needing.

“I don’t think I’d ever been so scared in my entire life,” I confess, my voice low. I sense Heath behind me, tension now radiating from him in waves, but this time he doesn’t touch me, and I take another deep breath before continuing. “The entire incident only lasted a few minutes, but sometimes, when it’s quiet, I can still hear them, the disgusting things they said before they grabbed me, and their hands while they were holding me down … I couldn’t believe it was happening. I screamed and struggled, tried to fight them off but they were so much stronger, just holding me on the ground like it was nothing, and nobody seemed to notice what was happening until Wyatt. I thought he was some kind of avenging angel, appearing out of nowhere. By then I couldn’t hear much of what was going on because of fear or adrenaline, I don’t know, but he must have said something to them because they just let me go and ran off … There wasn’t anything physically wrong with me besides a few scrapes and bruises, so he brought me home and that was it. Sorted out my car and it was like nothing ever happened. Later, he would say I owed him for saving my life and he would call me to help when he needed some first aid, but now I’m thinking he never needed me at all. It was always just me …”

A sob lodges in my throat and in the space of a heartbeat Heath takes me in his arms and holds me close against his body. The next sob bursts free and the floodgates open wide, but all I can manage is to hold on to the man who’s shown me his strength time and again and who’s now allowing me to take some of that strength for myself. He picks me up and carries me back to the couch where he sits with me on his lap. He doesn’t say anything, or rush me to stop crying, just rocks gently with me in his arms, crooning softly in my ear. Mom’s quilt could not have been more comforting right now, so I give myself a few minutes to soak it in, Heath’s love which he’s giving so freely and all I have to do is accept it. Once the tears and hiccups have subsided, I try to pull back and he loosens his hold with some reluctance but doesn’t let go. “Let me up for a minute? I need to use the bathroom and see if I can put myself back together again.” I try for a reassuring smile but judging from the look on Heath’s face, I’ve clearly missed my mark.

“Liv, no matter what you think you look like, you are perfect to me, but I’ll give you a little space. Shout if there’s anything you need or want.” He winks at me, and this time my smile is less forced as a flurry of hope settles in my chest. All I have to do is accept it. Everything might be okay. I could continue to open up and Heath will still be there to hold me together when the dust settles.

The bathroom is exactly as I expected, immaculately clean and modern and not a single decorative feature in sight. Everything is purely functional. The mirror also doesn’t hold any surprises. My eyes are red and puffy, and my nose feels wet and gross. Perfect indeed. An overwhelming urge to hide keeps me rooted in front of the vanity, but I can hear Heath moving around in his kitchen, so I wash my hands and face before joining him.

“Hey, there you are. Feeling better?” He’s standing by the fridge, picking from what looks like a bowl of grapes, but his eyes scan over my face as if trying to read my thoughts.

“Yes, thank you.” Stopping at the kitchen counter, I stare back at him, hoping to find some clue as to how to proceed. “I–”

“How about we sit and talk some more.” Shit, not what I was hoping for, but I suppose if we’re going to pick at all my wounds, we might as well get it all done in one go. Lead the way, Doctor Hayes. I give him a nod and he strides towards me and takes my hand in his before planting a soft kiss on my lips. It’s a chaste kiss, meant to reassure rather than entice, but still sends a shiver down my spine. Heath pulls back slowly, smiles, winks, and then walks us to the couch. This time I sit next to him rather than on his lap, but we both turn so we’re facing each other, which brings our bodies closer together.

“This is nice, but I feel like we should be braiding each other’s hair, or painting our toenails,” I joke, and he chuckles before giving me a devilish look.

“What, no naked pillow fight?” We both laugh at that, even as I feel the energy charge around us.

“Not exactly conducive to serious conversation.” His gaze softens as he takes both my hands in his.

“Who said it has to be serious?” I shrug, meeting his eyes. No more hiding.

“I don’t know, it just seems like that kind of night, I guess.”

“Baby, it wasn’t my intention to ruin our night, but you have to admit that conversation needed to happen, right? I promise, I won’t push anymore tonight. Only fun topics from here on out.” I huff out a laugh.

“Ah no, I see what you did there, and tomorrow we’ll just be doing this all over again. If you have anything else you want to know, ask. I don’t mind, promise.” He studies me for a moment, as if trying to determine if I’m truly okay with this.

“Okay, if you’re sure, because there is something I’ve been wondering about.” Here it comes. “How did you know I was dating someone? Riley wouldn’t have said anything, and you seemed so sure, but then you gave some vague reply when I asked you about it.” Oh God, this is not going to lead anywhere good.

“Um, I actually saw you once, with a woman. It was at Bay General and … uh”

“Yeah, Kelsey is a doctor there. What were you doing there?”

“I spent a night there, after the whole Russian thing. Wyatt said he mentioned it to you.” Heath doesn’t respond right away, but his chest heaves from the increased rate of his breathing and his hands clench a little tighter around mine. A muscle in his jaw ticks a few times before he manages to speak.

“Yeah, he told me about that. Fuck, Liv, I wish I had known. Just thinking about you going through that all alone makes me crazy.” He doesn’t do anything to hide this from me.

“No, there’s no need for that. Luke came to get me, and he stayed with me for the night and–” Again Heath’s hands tighten.

“He only stayed one night?!” His jaw is clenched, so the words are just above a whisper, but he’s also sitting right in front of me, so the sudden anger is hard to miss.

“Well, yes. He had a job to get back to and I was fine. There– “

“What the fuck, Liv! You were beaten, tortured, and he left you after just one night?!”

“Will you stop interrupting me? I told you I was fine. The doctor said it was okay for me to go home. He wouldn’t have done that if there was anything to worry about.” I stop talking now because Heath looks ready to explode. He opens his mouth, shuts his eyes as if trying to organize his thoughts, opens his eyes again, and takes another breath.

“Can I ask you something without you getting upset?” says the man who looks like the top of his head is about to blow off.

“I can’t promise that, no. Just ask your question.”

“Are you close with your brother?” Okay, I wasn’t expecting that.

“Sure, he’s my twin. You know that already.”

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