Page 18 of Liv Parrish

“I am. I mean I want to. Ugh, I feel like a freshman crushing on the high school quarterback. I’m so far out of my depth, it’s ridiculous.” I can feel the blush creeping up my cheeks, for crying out loud. It’s not like I’m some wide-eyed virgin. I’ve experienced what it’s like to be with a man I was deeply in love with, but I guess it’s losing that love that made me so reluctant to trust my own feelings.

“Hon, I think a SEAL trumps a quarterback any day of the week. Nobody’s going to blame you for second guessing yourself, but if you get in your own way, you’re going to regret this for the rest of your life. So, if you listen to nothing else I’ve said, listen to this: Talk to him and then trust your instincts. It won’t steer you wrong.”

Chapter 5

~ Heath ~

I stare at my laptop, where no less than seven reports wait for data to be recorded for clients who pay us large sums of money to take care of their corporate security. However, the cursor has not moved in over thirty minutes, so the screen is black. I could say it’s as black as my mood, but that would be a cliché, not to mention incorrect. What is the color of fear? Or the color of anxiety over how badly I screwed up with Liv? It’s as if the universe knows how much she already means to me, after such a short time of knowing her, and is conspiring to put me in situations I could not possibly handle correctly. Instead, I say the wrong things, act the wrong way and now it’s all gone to shit. I don’t know, maybe black is the right color for hopeless self-pitying despair, and my black screen mocks me for every minute I sit here. As if on cue, Riley and Wyatt come sauntering into my office. Wyatt seems to be recovering well from the beating he took almost a week ago, his injuries not as serious as we originally feared, even though his nose was broken and will take the longest to heal.

“Hey.” Riley is all smiles as he sinks into one of the plush chairs across from my desk. I only grunt at their intrusion into my thoughts. As much as I want the distraction, I’m not sure I’m going to be happy with the outcome of this visit. That would be largely due to the other man in the room. Wyatt doesn’t wait for an invitation to join in.

“What crawled up your ass?” I glare up at him before responding.

“I need to talk to you.” Out of the corner of my eye I notice Riley stiffening slightly at my tone, instantly more alert.

“About?”

“Liv Parrish.” Just saying her name brings forth memories of the time we’ve spent together, and it takes supreme effort to get my mind back on the man in front of me, who has yet to take a seat.

“God, that woman. Not a self-preserving bone in her entire body. What do you want to know?” He pauses for a moment and then something strange happens to his face. It’s the look Dad used to get when my sisters went on dates, or talked about dating, or just the guys they liked. “Hang on, she’s not … is she the woman you were telling me about in the bar that night? The one who wasn’t that into you. Shit! Did you fuck her?!” He steps closer to my desk and suddenly Riley is standing next to me as well, his hands raised in a placating gesture.

“Whoa, take it easy, guys. No need to get excited.” Wyatt drops his voice before repeating his question.

“Did you fuck her?” Déjà vu must be having a good old chuckle at my expense right now.

“Why do you care? What is your relationship to her, besides using her whenever you need someone with some first aid training?” It was my intention to provoke him. Maybe if he punched me, I would stop feeling so emotionally untethered and have something tangible to be upset about. I should have tried harder because Wyatt only continues to glare at me.

“Just answer the question, Hayes.”

“I haven’t fucked her. I want to, but it’s more than that. I want a future with her. So, I need to know, who are you to her?” He studies me for a moment, maybe looking for the right words to explain something I don’t want to know but need to for my own peace of mind.

“We met a few months ago. She got herself into a situation that could have ended very badly, but I was able to help. With my reputation on the streets, I was able to get her to safety, but it might have also drawn some unwanted attention, so I’ve been keeping an eye on her, making sure she doesn’t become a target. The first aid stuff is an excuse to keep contact, make sure she’s okay.”

“Yeah, I was wondering about that. With our SEAL training, you should easily be able to take care of most situations on your own. Now it makes sense why you used her.”

“Will you please stop saying it like that? I’ve done everything I can to keep her at arm’s length. We’re not friends, although I think she might want to be. She seems lonely sometimes, but she has no idea who I really am. I thought it would be safer for her that way.”

“Yeah, I know. Sorry man, I was being a dick. It’s all just messing with my head, the attack and almost being raped– “

“She told you about that?” erupts from Wyatt at the same time as Riley’s “What?!” fills my office and the atmosphere fills with the kind of energy that leads to men storming off to battle, blood raging against injustice.

“She didn’t go into the details, but I got the gist. Thank you for what you did. I can never–”

“You don’t have to, that’s between me and her. The work she does, the things I’ve seen her do … she’s a good person who genuinely cares about other people and doesn’t think twice about putting herself out there. That’s rare in this city. Hell, it’s rare no matter where you go. So, I’ll continue looking out for her until she tells me she’s done, because God knows she needs someone to have her back. And I know you’re going to want to take over that role, and that’s cool, but I’ll still be doing my part too.” Riley chooses this moment to chime in.

“Aah, look at you two, making nice. You realise she’s not all that happy with you guys, right? Hell, she’s even dodging my calls and I am her friend. I should have known being associated with you was going to cost me at some point.” He winks at me and turns to leave my office. Wyatt remains standing, and once it’s just the two of us, he turns his attention back to me.

“I owe you an apology for my outburst earlier. I know you’ll treat Liv the way she deserves, but she’s special, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. No need to apologise. I’m glad she has you in her corner, but the kind of life we lead, there’s bound to be blowback at some point, and I don’t want her anywhere near it if I can help it, you understand?”

“I know what you’re asking Heath, but I can’t walk away. There’s a very real possibility that people I’ve dealt with in the past, will find out about her and–”

“Let me protect her then. I can get closer to her. I know the risks.”

“Exactly how close will you be able to get if she’s not ready to accept you yet?”

“You let me worry about that. Just like you, I overreacted to a conversation that completely blindsided me. I’ll explain and then I’ll make it up to her.”

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