Page 14 of Liv Parrish

“What are you doing here, Liv?” he asks in a hushed tone, the words clipped, and there is no sign of the affection he showed the last time we were together.

“Nick asked me to come, but if I knew you guys would be here as well, I wouldn’t have bothered. It’s not like he needs me if Mike is going to take care of him.” I struggle to keep the attitude out of my response, because I suddenly feel a little defensive, not sure what Heath’s insinuating. His brows drop as he looks at me with what can only be described as confusion.

“Who’s Nick?”

“What do you mean who’s Nick?” I point to Nick who is now hunched forward so that Mike can examine his face. Poor guy. That nose is definitely broken.

“That’s Wyatt, but I suppose a different name makes sense considering,” he mumbles, almost as if he’s forgotten he’s talking to me. “And how do you even know him?” Okay, I’ve had enough of this. I have better things to do with my time than being interrogated by this guy.

“You know what? I think I’m going to let him answer all your questions seeing as he’s the one who brought us all here. I’m going home.” I move towards the sofa, but only close enough to gain Nick’s attention. “Nick, I’m heading out. It looks like you’ve got things covered here. Call if you need anything else, okay?” He barely looks at me but waves his hand in acknowledgement.

“Later, Little Pain.” And with that, I head for the door.

“I’ll walk you to your car.” Heath again, and from the look on his face there’s no point in arguing. And of course, he would offer, because our conversation was obviously not awkward enough for his liking. We make it down three flights of stairs in silence, although I can feel the weight of it bearing down on my shoulders and resting on my soul. Dramatic, I know, but I was hoping to avoid any confrontation with Heath for a while longer. The truth is, I like him, a lot, but there are things from my past I should probably deal with before starting a relationship with someone new. It’s held me back long enough, according to Luke at least. And he’s not wrong. I’ve deliberately steered clear of any romantic involvement because of David, because I wasn’t good enough or he didn’t want me enough. And he left.

“He calls you Little Pain?”

“No, he–” Then I remember who he’s referring to. Nick. Wyatt? “Yeah, that’s what he calls me.”

“Why?” His tone is strangely flat, but it still washes over me like a storm brewing.

“Uh … Why do you call him Wyatt?”

“Because that’s his name, Wyatt Manning. We served together; I’ve known him for almost a decade.” Right. Of course, they would have history between them.

“Oh.” I guess he would know then. Thinking that makes me feel gullible and stupid, believing everything Nick told me just because he saved my life. Dammit, Wyatt. That’s going to take some getting used to. “I haven’t known him that long, just a few months actually. We kind of met under unusual circumstances, so every now and again I help him out when he needs someone with a bit of first aid knowledge, but I’m glad he has you guys as well. He’s going to need more help than I can give this time.”

“Yeah, we’ve got his back, but I was hoping to be here for you too, and not just when you need me. I’m sorry for how I acted just now. It was just unexpected, seeing you there with him, but I was serious before, Liv. I want to–”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to apologize. I understand it was a weird situation, but I should go, and you should probably get back to Ni–. Wyatt. He’s hurt pretty bad, so you need to help him first. We can talk later.” And with that, I lock myself into my car and drive off, because knowing I need to face my past and doing it are two vastly different things. Heath does seem like the persistent type though, and my phone beeps with an incoming message before I even get home. Not wanting to appear too eager, I don’t look until I’m in my apartment where I finally feel like I can breathe again.

Unknown: I know it’s late, but I want to see you tomorrow. Text me. Heath

Me: Take care of Wyatt first. We can make plans later

Heath: Wyatt is fine. Mike’s taking care of him. He’ll be good as new in no time

At least that’s one less thing to worry about. Wyatt Manning. Not exactly a name you would associate with the Irish Mob. I can see why he changed it, but does that mean everything I know about him is a lie? If he’s involved with Heath, does that mean he’s essentially working undercover? The possibilities are endless, and I must admit I’m more than a little intrigued. I’ve always loved reading about secret organizations, military operations, things the government doesn’t want us to know. Let’s just say SEAL Team Six is the coolest ever and leave it at that. Wyatt must have known I would find out who he is when his friends showed up at the apartment. Did he orchestrate it that way specifically for this reason? Does it mean he’s done working for the Irish? I hope so for his sake, but it might also mean that he’ll be moving on, leaving the city to find new bad guys to catch, not that we don’t have plenty more here. So maybe he’ll stay …

Heath: Goodnight, Liv. Hope to hear from you soon

Right. Time to face the music, I guess. Either I keep hiding, even though I told Luke I wasn’t, or I face this attraction to Heath head on and trust that lightning won’t strike twice, because I don’t think I’ll survive another hit. I try to take comfort in knowing Heath feels it too, that we are in this together and taking a chance on him might turn out to be worth the risk. I guess there’s only one way to find out.

Me: Goodnight, Heath. I’ll text you tomorrow

§§§

The apartment is quiet and empty. There’s no sign of Nick or his friends, but bloodstained rags lie scattered all over the carpet and on the old sofa he’d been sitting on only hours before. I call out to him, but there’s no reply, just an eerie silence that seems unnatural for this part of town. There are no sirens, traffic noises, or people talking in the halls of the neighboring apartments. That’s when I notice movement from the corner of my eye and turn in that direction and there stands … David. Oh God, he’s here! He’s smiling at me, looking happy and oh so handsome in his fireman’s uniform. I extend my arms, trying to rush towards him, but … I can’t move. My legs refuse to carry my weight and I crumple to the floor like a puppet separated from its strings. David just stares at me for a moment with pity in his eyes before he turns away. No! Please don’t leave me again. I miss you so much. Why did you have to go when all I wanted to do was love you? Questions run through my mind but no sound escapes from my lips until … the apartment is suddenly engulfed in flames … and I start screaming.

Dreaming of David used to be a nightly occurrence, until quite recently. They would vary from those soft-focus happy dreams where we were still blissfully in love and planning our future together, to the nightmare I just woke up from, panting, my heart racing, and my clothes drenched in sweat. They bring with them a pain that is almost as crippling as the day he left me. This one was one of the worst and it leaves me feeling drained and listless to the point where I make excuses not to meet Ren and Evan for breakfast. Instead, I keep myself locked up in my apartment and read through the brief text exchange with Heath as though it contains the answers to all my problems.

I know he is one of the good guys and that he wouldn’t intentionally hurt me, but then I thought the same of David when we first met. God, we were so young, or at least at nineteen I was, and I was stupid in love with him. He was still a rookie firefighter when I started volunteering at the same fire station in Austin, while studying to become a paramedic. He was so handsome, funny and kind, and he immediately took me under his wing even though he was only a few years older, and we were both still new there. The more experienced firefighters gave him hell for it, of course but he just shrugged it off and soon we were inseparable. People warned me we were moving too fast, especially Luke, even though he wasn’t around to see our relationship grow, but I suppose they had a point. David was my first love and considering that I didn’t have any family close by or many friends to rely on, it could appear to outsiders that he was taking advantage of me, but I never felt that way. We were so wrapped up in each other, nothing else mattered except for the bond we were creating together, but obviously things changed. I stare around my little apartment and try to imagine what my life would have been like if there hadn’t been a fire that day, or at least not that fire. Would we still be living in Austin? Would we even still be together? What does it mean that I can feel such a strong attraction towards Heath when it’s been only little more than a year since David left?

There is a new path that lies before me now, new choices to make and even though I’m scared and wildly apprehensive, a small part of me is excited. If I’m honest, I’ve missed being close to someone, feeling that special connection and, yes, I’ve missed the physical side of being in a relationship too. The chemistry between Heath and I is not one-sided, he’s made that crystal clear, but the question is whether I can put my fears behind me and accept what he’s offering? I don’t even know what that is exactly. Until we see each other again, it’s all just speculation.

Me: Hey! I’m not working today. Want to come over for dinner?

Heath: Sounds great, I’ll bring takeout. What do you like?

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