Page 19 of My Heart for Yours

We left the police station yesterday after arranging for Joe to come and help. Marshall Falls’ police department is adequate on most days but considering that we hardly have any crime that isn’t saying much, and the current force is by no means equipped to handle a search and rescue. That’s assuming Starke didn’t take Lisa back to Chicago. I don’t think he has because he specifically mentioned it in the text, so my logic tells me that’s the last place he would take her. However, that leaves a million other possibilities, so help has been called in from our neighboring towns. Joe also mentioned possible federal involvement because Starke is facing multiple charges in different states, the crossing-state-lines thing again. God, I’m really starting to hate those words, but all this means is that I’ve been relegated to the sidelines while others do the work and that is not a comfortable place to be. I can’t be passive in this; it’s too important.

Jay and Aaron both stuck close throughout the day but eventually I sent them home last night promising to let them know if I needed anything. News of Lisa’s disappearance spread quickly through town and I received calls from Dad, Derick, and even Travis offering assistance. Many more calls besides those re-established why this town was and always will be my home and I have no doubt Lisa will feel the same way once we start our life together. And it will happen because I won’t accept any other outcome. I had enough sleepless hours to overcome any doubts I might have had that Lisa would not be mine.

It’s just before noon and I’m considering going to the bar rather than sitting at home worrying. Reid offered to take care of things today and I gratefully accepted, but now the walls of my home are closing in on me while my memories taunt me. I grab my phone and prepare to leave when it starts ringing in my hand. Joe’s name comes up on the screen.

“Joe, any news?” We’ve discarded the formalities and are now on a first name basis. I also think his brisk manner is rubbing off on me.

“I just got into town, staying at the Inn on Partridge. Thought I’d check in.” The man really doesn’t waste words.

“I appreciate that. I own Shane’s Bar; you would have passed it on your way in. Do you want to meet me there so we can talk, and you can get something to eat as well?” He doesn’t hesitate.

“Sounds good.” And with that he hangs up and I head out the door.

Joe steps into the bar about two minutes after me and we grab a booth against the back wall. He’s a big guy, imposing in stature even though he must be pushing sixty, with greyish hair to match his steely eyes and only a slight spread around the waist. You can tell he still leads an active lifestyle but now is not the time for personal questions. Once his lunch order is sorted, we take each other in for a moment. “So, you and Lisa are serious?” Okay, so much for not asking personal questions.

“I love her, so I would say yes.” He stares at me like he’s trying to see into my soul, and I imagine he was a very good detective in his day.

“And what would she say?” I stare right back at him.

“She’s already told me she loves me, so I know where I stand. She mentioned that you are the closest thing to family she has, so I don’t mind answering your questions but that’s all you get. Now we talk about the case.” He stares a moment longer and then nods his head, as if to signal his agreement and starts to fill me in on Cole Starke.

They met about a year ago, through some photography club they both belonged to and he’s been stalking her ever since. It started out innocently enough; showing up at the same places, making it look like coincidences, but he then started escalating by calling her at all hours of the day and eventually sending gifts to her apartment. This was when she brought her concerns to Joe who made her report Cole to the CPD, but because there was no explicit threat their hands were tied. Joe did use his influence to get them to launch an unofficial investigation into Starke which is when they came across the murder cases.

I don’t interrupt because he’s pretty much told me everything I need to know. The women that were found were all in their early twenties, small build with brown hair and green eyes. This tells me they weren’t random; he approached them because of those specific features, but there is one point Joe seems to be skirting around and I know it’s intentional.

“I need to know what he does to the women.” Joe flinches, or at least reacts as much as someone who has seen the worst of the worst will flinch.

“It’s an ongoing investigation, Shane. I can’t give you any details.” I can’t accept that and I know he sees this on my face.

“Joe, I need to know if he hurts them. I need to know what he’s doing to her right now.” I think he knows what I mean, but his face doesn’t give anything away. He takes a breath and I brace for what might come next.

“Look, we obviously don’t know this for sure, but these other women were not his target. They were distractions, placeholders until he could get to Lisa. For whatever reason, he took his time to get to know her, to go through the whole stalking thing rather than just asking her out like a normal person. Profilers I’ve spoken to say that he genuinely believes in the relationship they already have, such as it is. He’s delusional which is never a good thing, but if he tries to force a romantic relationship and Lisa can play it smart long enough, we can get to her before he turns violent.” I hear what he’s not saying, clear as a bell and it fills me with unmentionable sadness for those five women and heart-wrenching fear for mine.

Lisa

Once again, I’m pretending to sleep, but this time for very different reasons. Cole is close, sitting on the edge of the bed and I can feel his stare like a physical touch. Or maybe he’s touching me, and my brain is in complete denial. Who knows? The point is, opening my eyes to make sure either way does not sound like fun. I actually managed to sleep for a few hours, but have been lying awake for some time just listening to the sounds of the house, trying to discern any noises from outside. There’s nothing, as if this house exists in a void and the only people caught inside are Cole and me. Eventually I do open my eyes and look at the man holding me captive, trying to soften my expression and give some sign of affection.

“Good morning, angel. How did you sleep?” I try to fake my enthusiasm for the day and smile at him.

“Not too bad, thank you. I really do need to use the bathroom though; do you mind helping me?” I figure if I play the helpless card, which I am, well enough and convince him that he has all the power, which he does, then I can win his trust sooner and gain my freedom, or at least get him to untie me permanently. He smiles as though I’ve given him a gift and stands up off the bed.

When he comes back into the room, he’s carrying the blindfold, which I expected. I lie still while he ties it around my head and wait patiently for him to untie me and help me up. I wish I could say that I faked holding onto him like I needed him, but my legs are so stiff from the uncomfortable position on the bed that I really needed to hold onto him. Cole doesn’t seem to mind at all and slides his arm around my waist while guiding me to the bathroom. A shudder runs through my body and I try to hide the loathing as best I can, but from the tighter grip around my waist and his hand lingering on my hip I think he must have misread my reaction. I can live with that, and if it helps me to get what I want a little sooner, all the better. I hate that he watches me in the bathroom, but it fuels my determination to get out of this situation. I must get through this and back to Shane. There hasn’t been a waking moment that I have not longed for him and I cannot allow fear or weakness to distract me from my plan, such as it is.

Back in the basement, Cole ties me down to the bed but leaves me in a seated position. Then he goes to make breakfast and I’m left to my own thoughts. An image of Joe pops into my head, grumpy but caring Joe who didn’t ask for a teenage runaway to upend his life but took responsibility for her anyway. I should have listened to him or at least taken the threat more seriously, but then I think of leaving Shane and I know no matter how this turns out, I would make the same decision to stay all over again.

Cole returns with a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon and a cup of coffee that smells like heaven. He feeds me like he did last night and when he’s done, he adjusts the ropes so that I’m lying down again. I consider asking him to leave some slack to allow me a little movement but worry that it might be too soon to start asking for special consideration when I haven’t offered anything in return. Again, he lingers over me and touches his lips to my face while stroking his hand up and down my arm which is extended over my head. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this vulnerable and exposed even though I’m fully dressed, and I hold my breath praying that this will be over soon. I force my mind back to Marshall Falls, to Shane’s home and his amazing couch where I’m curled up on his lap, comfortable and safe. I wonder what he’s doing right now, if he’s thinking of me, worried. Please, God, don’t let him believe that text. I need him so much right now. I try not to register Cole’s hand now roaming over my shoulder, across my clavicle and down to my breast and I really try not to notice that he is hard again and moving his hips next to mine. I’m in so much trouble. I love you Shane!

I’m on the verge of begging Cole to stop when he suddenly jerks back as if he’s been electrocuted and gets up off the bed. What just happened? Don’t get me wrong, I’m beyond ecstatic that he stopped on his own, but was it because of something I did or something he felt? I suspect that this grope session might have scored me some goodwill and I just need to find the best time to use it to my benefit later. He leaves the room without looking back and I spend the rest of the morning curled up on Shane’s couch.

After my lunchtime bathroom break, Cole surprises me by not taking me back to the basement. Instead, he leads me further into the house and then motions for me to sit on a couch that doesn’t feel at all like the one I want to be on. I feel him sit down next to me which immediately sets my nerves on edge, but I try to slouch so that I might appear relaxed and at ease. He needs to believe that I trust him so that he’ll let his guard down. He breathes in my ear and I’m acutely aware of how close he is and of his large hand that is gripping the hell out of my wrist. He’s not letting me go, so I need to play this smart.

“Angel, I want to see those beautiful eyes of yours. If I take the blindfold off, do you promise to behave for me?” Yes! Just play it cool.

“I promise Cole. I want to see you too.” I follow this up with a shy smile and drop my chin to appear non-challenging and wait for him to untie the blindfold. He doesn’t do this right away though, and for a moment I think he’s changed his mind, but then I feel his one hand struggling with the knot while the other still holds onto my wrist. He must give up on the knot because the next moment the blindfold is yanked off my head and bright light stings my eyes. It only takes them a few seconds to adjust and then I’m stunned silent by my surroundings. It looks like the inside of one of those ski lodges you see in travel magazines, the kind only the very rich and famous can afford. Cole sits quietly, waiting for me to look at him and when I do, he gives me a satisfied smirk.

“What do you think?” It takes me a moment to formulate the words and no acting is required to sell the fact that I’m impressed.

“Cole, this place is amazing. Is this your home? I thought you live in Chicago.” Okay, maybe a little acting. I might be laying it on a bit thick but stroking his ego and making him feel good seems to be working. He chuckles, obviously delighted with my praise and I feel the grip on my wrist relax ever so slightly.

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