Page 49 of Elicit (Decadence After Dark)

The last few months we were together, her husband started receiving threatening letters, targeting their family. My office was investigating while we were secretly burning up the sheets. Everything surfaced the same fatal night. I was on a protective detail when she called me frantic. She thought someone was following her and was scared to go home. I left my post to find her. I believed I was doing something heroic. Protecting someone I loved. Something I was trained to do. Turns out, I was nailing the coffin in my own career. She was being followed, but not by an adversary. By her husband. He caught wind of our affair and wanted to expose us. And expose us he did. He had set the whole thing up. Conniving bastard.

Once our scandalous relationship surfaced, I faced disciplinary action. And because of the sensitive nature of the diplomat’s relationship with the state (i.e. he had deep pockets and a far reach), I was ultimately fired for misconduct. It was a crushing blow. I never in my wildest dreams believed I would get fired if we were discovered. Reprimanded, yes, but fired, no. In the blink of an eye, I went from having everything—the career I worked tirelessly for, a future laid out, and a beautiful, intelligent woman by my side—to having nothing.

Even if she wasn’t totally mine, we were still making plans. She was going to leave her husband. We were going to get married. Or so she had me believe. When I turned to her in my darkest hour, she turned away. The truth was, she never really lovedme. She only loved the things I could do to her. The things I could make her feel.

Young, stupid, and blindly inlust. That’s what I was. Because she could make me feel things, too. She was a match for my sexual prowess, but the emotion was never real, and I figured that out too late. After I lost everything, including her.

My pride took a beating, and I retreated back to the one place I felt safe. Back to the two people who were my home. Alistair and my mother.

They helped me nurse my wounds but never coddled me. I stood back up on my own. And it was fucking hard. Probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

About a year later, a man in a suit knocked on my door. He handed me a white business card with one word inscribed on it—Endeavor. He said if I wanted a second chance, I should call the number on the back. It was a one-shot deal. Take it or leave it.

Blindly I took it. Jumpstarting my career and sending me in a completely different direction. I was placed on a special task force with this new secretive agency, ordered to recruit soldiers who possessed certain qualities—like apathy for their own and other human lives—train them for black ops missions, and then set them free in the world to see what kind of enemy lines they could infiltrate. One of these recruitments is where I met Kayne, and our fates intertwined.

Speaking of the devil, I mull over what Kayne said. Is London just another Illaya? Am I again wrapped up in a second smothering blanket of blind lust?

I didn’t think so until he questioned me. Now, I’m questioning myself.

But I can’t ignore what’s right in front of me. What my body is telling me. And what my heart is screaming.

Yes, like Illaya, London matches my sexual prowess, but she also matches so much more. Something on a metaphysical level.

It’s almost indescribable.

It doesn’t matter what’s about to begin—or end—one thing will remain the same. Whatever the storm brings, London and I will learn to dance in the rain. There’s no other option because she’s my choice—my today and all my tomorrows.

After I load two tons’ worth of shopping bags into the trunk, I scoop up Kayne from Expo. There is a different air about him when he gets into the car.

“See your girlfriend?”

He clears his throat and tugs on the lapels of his suit jacket, hiding behind his aviators. “Shut the fuck up and drive.”

“You’ve got some red shit in your teeth,” I point out.

Kayne flips down the vanity mirror and inspects his mouth. “Motherfucker.” He scrapes away the food.

I don’t hide my amusement. “Bet she found that real sexy.”

Kayne groans. “It couldn’t have turned her off too much because she asked me to Mark’s party tonight.” There’s a haughty edge to his tone. Very unlike Kayne.

“And are you going?”

“Of course not.”

“Why?”

“Why? Because the last thing I need is a distraction.”

“Chicken.”

“I’m not fucking chicken.”

“Yes, you are. You’re twenty-six and never been on a date in your life.” I can’t see his eyes through the mirrored lenses, but I know he’s glaring at me.Truth hurts, buddy. “I say go. Javier is flying in tomorrow night. It’s game on after that. Don’t miss an opportunity to go after what you want. Even if you only get it for one night. You’ve been pining over that girl for a year. What’s the worst that can happen? You go, have a few drinks, hang out, and maybe if you’re lucky, she’ll let you bang the shit out of her in the bathroom before you leave. Sounds like a good time to me.”

There’s a perturbed rumble in Kayne’s chest. I’m not sure what’s irking him more, the fact he wants to go and is scared shitless or the fact that I’m right.

He hates it when I’m right.

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