Page 49 of Good Girl

“I looked him up.” Jonathan shrugged and took an aggressive bite of his sandwich.

“You looked him up?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Not just because Matt was one of the men I was sleeping with but the fact that Jonathan had taken that intervening so badly that he had resorted to hunting down and finding out who had stopped him from being a dick that day. Jonathan fixed me with a smug look as he chewed, and anger swept up my throat, hot and acidic as my heart raced.

“You’re a fucking psychopath,” I snapped furiously. “Stay the fuck away from me, away from my school, away from researching myteachers—just leave me alone.” I raised my voice to try and fully get my point across this time, and to my disgust, Jonathan just looked amused. That angered me further, and I stormed away, tossing my lunch into the nearest trash can on the way past. My appetite had died the second I realized Jonathan was trying to keep a slimy presence in my life, and I couldn’t stand it.

The anger hadn’t dissipated by the time I returned to the inn, and I marched inside, heart hammering and skin hot. The moment I saw my mother, I erupted.

“Stop trying to manipulate my life!” I snapped at her. Her eyes went wide, and her thin lips pursed into a prune as I continued. “Stop trying to set me up on dates with people I hate, stop looking down on me because of my weight, stop judging me because I’m single! I don’t need anice boyto bide my time with, I don’t need you prickling at me every second, and I don’t need you making me feel guilty because I can’t drop by for a visit when school is busy! Why can’t you just support me for being me—”

“Charlotte!” my mother barked loudly, cutting off my tirade, and I stumbled over my last words, panting. “Howdareyou speak to me that way.”

“Talking to you normally doesn’t seem to work with you,” I replied hotly. “I can’tbelieveyou tried to set me up with that snake, Jonathan, again.”

“He’s not a snake. He’s a lovely boy, and I thought it would do you some good to have some focused attention.” Her brows rose sharply, and I groaned out loud.

“Do you ever even listen to me? I told you when I broke up with him how awful he treated me, that hecheatedon me. Doesn’t that go against all your biblical beliefs?” My hands landed on my hips for something to grip onto as I stared down my mother.

“Oh, don’t be silly.” She waved a hand, brushing off my words. “I spoke to his mother about that, and really, I think you blew it out of proportion. You can’t afford to be choosy, Charlotte.”

“There you go again!” I snapped. “I can be as choosy as I want to be. I deserve someone who will treat me well, and I deserve a mother who lovesmeand not the twisted, perfect, porcelain image that she’s tried to paint over me throughout the years.”

“Charlotte...” She raised a hand and pressed it to her chest, her lips parted in surprise. “What on earth has you acting this way? I think it’s about time that you stayed here and got your act together. The city is turning you into an awful, awful shrew.”

Hot anger flooded through my system, choking off my words, and tears of frustration flooded my eyes as my grip on my hips turned painful.

“No,” I finally managed to say. “I’m leaving. I’m going back to school, and I’m not coming back here!”

I spun around and headed for the stairs, my mother’s hurried footsteps scurrying behind me.

“Charlotte, don’t be so silly. You’re not acting like yourself, and this wretched attitude that you have needs to end, immediately!”

“Maybe this attitude is just me, Mother,” I snapped angrily. “Maybe I’m tired of not being listened to. Maybe I’mfuckingtired of feeling out of place in the one place that’s supposed to be home!”

My mother’s loud gasp at my cursing followed me up the stairs as I furiously stomped back to my room.

Being here only highlighted how good I had it back at school with Derek and the others, and that was where I wanted to be.

I belonged with them, and I was going to cling to that with every ounce of strength I had.

23

CHARLOTTE

Upon my return to Brown, I hoped that I would be able to sink my frustrations and upset into an exciting session with Derek, or any of the guys. Unfortunately, the entire week had different plans.

With exams creeping up around the corner, my workload doubled in size, and there wasn’t any time to breathe, let alone sneak away for a sexy session with any of the men I was adoring. The impending exams also mellowed Haley out somewhat, and she reeled in her usual bitchiness in favor of making sure she was up to date in all her classes. It was a surprise, but after dealing with my mother and Jonathan, Haley was like a breath of fresh air.

She wore her rudeness like a badge of honor, unlike my mother, and she didn’t sneak around behind my back trying to weasel back into my life like Jonathan.

As the week wore on and the days ticked by, however, I found myself craving attention that couldn’t be given, and the denial of such an appetite was feeding into the feelings of frustration left over from my time at home. I saw Samuel only once while walking through the halls between classes, but since our school circles didn’t mix, there was no plausible way for me to say hi. I hadn’t seen Matt at all, and the two classes with Derek that week ended early as he was called away before the end of the session both times.

I tried to soothe my creeping loneliness with texting, but conversation was bland, and each time a message went unread for longer than a couple of hours, the paranoia started to sink in.

Had I made a mistake?

Did leaving for the weekend give the guys an opportunity to re-evaluate how they felt and what we were doing together? Had they changed their minds? With no one to talk to about the array of complicated feelings building inside me—and no window to talk to the guys about it—the turmoil started to build, and I found myself thinking back to advice Haley had uttered about Paul. If it could even be called advice. She kept Paul at arm’s distance sometimes, kissed strangers in clubs when she was mad at him, and ignored his calls and texts to prove points that I didn’t understand.

She also claimed I would understand more once I’d sucked a dick, but honestly, that understanding was still lost on me.