Page 67 of The Sound in Silence

After another moment, she lifts her head from my chest, revealing fresh tears. I wipe them away with my thumb, as she manages a soft smile.

Thanks,she mouths before pulling out of my hold entirely and returning to her sister’s side. They link hands and begin walking from the cemetery, Nico and me following close behind.

* * *

Nico offers to host us for dinner, but Ariella shakes her head, denying his request, so we head back to the airfield. After a long goodbye with Della, she climbs the stairs into our plane, her shoulders lower than earlier. I wait until she’s inside the plane before shaking hands with Nico.

“Thanks for this.”

“Thank you,” he replies, releasing me so I can go.

Della blocks my next step. Her gaze darts to the plane’s windows and back, her teeth sawing on her bottom lip. “Give her time. She’ll be okay. She admitted reliving the entire accident when she saw the grave.”

“Got it.”To relive such a thing. “Did she describe what happened?” How horrible was it for her to re-experience that?

Della shakes her head. “It’s one thing we never spoke about, even years ago, and honestly,” her expression pinches before she blinks into the sun above, “I don’t want to know.”

After a final goodbye, I take the metal steps two at a time. Jack follows behind and begins assisting the pilot for takeoff, while I seek out my wife, who isn’t on the couches. The door to the small bedroom at the back is shut, and without knocking, I enter, finding her curled tightly in the centre of the bed. Her eyes are clamped shut.

Sitting on the edge, I stroke the back of one of her hands. Her eyes open, finding me instantly. “You’ll get through this, Ariella, even if it feels like you won’t. You have in the past, and you will this time because you’re so fucking strong.”

She nods but I wonder how much she actually heard me. Giving her hand a final pet, I stand to leave her when her hand darts out for mine, delicate fingers wrapping my wrist. The metal of her ring grounds me, lowering me back to her side.

Stay. Please,she mouths, and shifts to make room.

Like I could deny her anything. I slip into the bed beside her, barely in position before she’s rolling over and burying her head in my chest. Another day, I’d relish holding her like this, but this feels different.

Because the moment I wrap my arm around her waist, she grasps my shirt and sobs burst from her heart again.

“Cry it out, Ariella. I have you. Thank you for trusting me enough to be this vulnerable.”

Ariella

The next day, my emotional walls erect again.

Grief is a funny thing and I’ve gone months without being sad about Mom. Without her being more than a passing thought. Yesterday washard. Almost as hard as when I first woke in the hospital to find Della clutching my hand before delivering the heart-shattering news. Nothing made sense then, and I relived it all yesterday.

Mom’s entire life has been subjected to a cemetery for the remainder of her time on Earth.

Growing up, life wasn’t the easiest. Mom worked two jobs to ensure Della and I were cared for and had what we needed to get by. After Della graduated from high school, she also got a full-time job, to contribute to the household. Then Mom met Stefano, and while she’s never admitted it, I believe his money was some of the appeal.

Do I think she truly loved him? Yes. Mom was very strong-minded, so marrying a man she didn’t care for isn’t something she would do. But knowing the man she was coming to like would also prevent her from crying over past-due bills at one in the morning might have been a driving force behind the speed of their relationship.

Unwittingly, Della and I followed in her footsteps. Each of us wed to the head of a mafia family. Each of us with new paths, that somehow, I feel Mom would be proud of.

Which is why, after I cried out every drop of liquid in my body yesterday, my grief slipped into the corners of my mind once more, and by the time I open my eyes the day after, waking alone in bed, I feelokay.

Erico’s already gone for the day, but he warned me he would be. Said he had to run into the city for a few things and would return in the late afternoon. Even through my tears, I smiled when he told me. It feltnormalfor a husband to have these conversations with his wife. We might not be the meet-cute I once dreamed of, or even the happily-ever-after, but we’re headed in the right direction, I think.

Dressing for breakfast, I laugh to myself. I feel fuckinggood. After yesterday, and even the day before, my depression has faded. Not gone—never gone. This diagnosis is stuck with me, and I it. Any little deep emotion will bring it to surface, but for now, I’m more confident. Happy.Right.

Not like I’m a burden. Not like Erico’s only here to fuck me, impregnate me, and abandon me to this empty life.

“You’re happy today,” Carlotta greets me when I all but skip into the kitchen. She takes in my pale, pink sundress with a grin. “You look good too—not that you don’t always. I just assumed, after yesterday—I’m sorry, Mrs. Rossi. Coffee?”

I nod and take my seat at the island as she prepares the mug. She assumed I’d be locked away in bed after yesterday. I debated it too. So easy to let myself get sucked beneath the wave of emotions and forget about life. But Iwantto write and play my music today. Iwantto spend time with my husband later —while he’s still interested.

The thing Idon’twant to do is attend the party his mother’s throwing tonight. Erico insisted on getting her to move it to next week, considering our day yesterday, but I waved the offer off. Mom wouldn’t want me to live in darkness my entire life. She’d want me to embrace this party and prove to the entireFamigliaI’m a force to be reckoned with. So it’s with her in my memory, I mentally prepare for tonight.

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