Page 62 of The Sound in Silence

With a small smile, she sips, barely swallowing any of the water before she’s typing her next message on my phone.

There was two things I went into your office to talk about. To yell at you about the supposed mistress and about Jack.

Jack Scuttle who is happily married and loyal as hell to his wife.

Why did you fire Sebastian?

A question not asked with curiosity but with an anger I relish in seeing. Spark. Match. Light. And…flames.

“I didn’t. He’s been reassigned. He’s a damn good soldier, and I’m not losing him.”

She pouts, which would look cute if it wasn’t for the antagonism blasting through slitted eyes. Fingers typing faster than before, she writes:

He was becoming my friend. He knows sign language. It felt nice to talk without paper or phones.

Which is the exact reason I’m working with him, but until I can hold a semi-decent conversation, I’m not admitting it to her.

“Your bodyguard shouldn’t be your friend. He was looking at you in ways I didn’t enjoy,wife.” I step between her legs, caging her in with my arms. She doesn’t bend backwards though, doesn’t play into my strength, but rather leans closer with her own before typing her long response.

It wasn’t like that and you know it. I wouldn’t do that. He was friendly while YOU left me alone in this large house with nothing to do. HE’S the one who showed me around, gave me company, made me feel less alone. Then I learned he knew sign language and it was too perfect. YOU handed me a friend which you’ve now replaced and I don’t like that.

Christ, she really knows how to stick it to a man.In that long message, my mind changes two different times. First, to obey her wishes and grant Sebastian to be by her side again, and then to keep the change I’ve put in place.

“Abandoning you the first day is a regret I’ll live with for the rest of our lives,” I admit. “But I’m not changing my mind on this.”

She frowns, causing my chest to split.

“But,” I start with a sigh, “you’ll likely see him around the mansion. At events and such when we need guards. For you, I’ll ensure he’ll always be assigned those tasks so you’ll have opportunities to see him.”

She returns to the phone, beaming, with a final message:

What was Jack talking about when he mentioned travelling with us tomorrow?

Ariella

I’m going home.

Well, I suppose I’mleavinghome—my new home. And heading toward my old one—the one I’ve known my entire life. Where Mom and Della and my childhood memories reside.

I don’t know what’s home anymore. What is and isn’t, but what I do, is I get to see my sister again.

The moment Montreal’s skyline comes into view, sitting becomes nearly impossible, if it wasn’t already, considering I managed the entire flight with Erico pretending not to be watching me. But I felt him continuously glancing from his laptop to me.

Random games on my phone kept me entertained for the flight, and I wrote a bit in my music journal, which I brought with me. Knowing the day laid out in front of me—the day I haven’t allowed myself to process yet—I may need a space to write about loss.

The pilot’s voice comes over the small speaker, announcing we’re landing within minutes, as the plane takes a sharp swoop and angles itself down to the ground.

“You’ll be okay.”

Erico’s statement drags my attention from the windows toward him, watching as he shuts his laptop and tucks it to the side. There wasn’t a question in it; no, “are you okay?” Just a blatant fact, like he knows I will be.

He can’t know for certain though. Not when evenIdon’t.

After yesterday, Erico’s been looking at me a lot more often, and if he was anyone else, I’d think it creepy. We didn’t kiss again after his office, or touch in any way, but the memory of his mouth against mine, of riding his hard body, filled my mind, my dreams, making sleep nearly impossible. A few times, I debated rolling into him, kissing him, exploring his body and granting him the permission to touch me, but I ended the fantasy before it began when the uncertainty took hold again.

Still, no regrets storming into his office yesterday. What do they say about relationships? Open communication is best. Guess that’s a fact.

When I finally passed out, I was woken only hours later by the most vivid dream I’ve had all week. This wasn’t a surprise though, and even without Erico mentioning the trip to Montreal, I’d still recall precisely what day it is, based on the dream alone. Every year, like clockwork, it infiltrates my mind. In the days and weeks leading up to the anniversary, it’s flashes. But the night before, it’severything. Every heartbreaking second, every hellish moment of that traumatizing experience.

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