Page 29 of The Sound in Silence

I don’t believe you. Eat.

Why, so I don’t starve to death and you’re left with nothing?

Tempting to message that to him, but I don’t.

After abandoning my phone, I roll over again, and right before I shut my eyes for good, I remember exactly which day it is.

In a mere few hours, I’ll be twenty-two.

* * *

Waking up the next morning, I hope to feel better.

I don’t.

The gloom clings, even as I finally drag myself from bed and toward the bathroom. It’s a win when I climb into the shower and wash up. A win when I dress in clean clothes.

In one way, I suppose I am doing better.

Must come with age. Wisdom and all that shit. Happy birthday to me.

But I’m not. I stare at the bed, feeling the most absolute longing to return to it. The rain continues, which means all I’ll be doing today is occupying myself. My one and only hobby—music—can be done from right in this room. No point in sitting downstairs, where Sebastian and Carlotta are.

But if you go down, you’ll be pretending to be human again.

Sometimes, my inner voice is too good to me. It’s so correct.

When I return to the bed to retrieve my phone, there’s a few messages already waiting. Many from Della wishing me a happy birthday, which I make a note to actually respond to later. To do what I’ve always done and pretend for her. She has enough to worry about without adding my mental health to her pile.

The next is from my husband. I wonder what time it is in Vegas, and what he’s been doing all night. He’s in a party city, two days after his wedding. How much is he celebrating right now?

How many women has he fucked for our honeymoon?

That makes me grow cold, to the point when my finger taps his message, it’s impossible not to feel a blatant anger about an accusation I have no proof of.

Erico

Please eat today.

No promises, buddy.He’s not ordering me from a place of care. More so his heir maker doesn’t die before he could impregnate me.

I shut the app and tuck my phone in my back pocket as I wander from the bed and toward the massive window. I fell asleep with the curtains open so they’re already drawn, and for a moment, I just zone out, watching the water and rain battle for control.

God, what I wouldn’t do to be in there right now.To swim away from everything.

You did this,my voice reminds me.

I did. An act I’m regretting with every passing hour.

A knock on the door pulls my attention away, and for a moment, I go still, wondering if Erico did indeed come home, like he threatened to.

That would mean he cares. He doesn’t care.

“Mrs. Rossi.”Sebastian.“Ariella, if you’ll come out, there’s a surprise for you from Mr. Rossi. It was just delivered.”

That has me walking toward the door. Not pleasure, but a curiosity driving me forward. When was the last time I was surprised? When Mom introduced her new boyfriend to Della and me. When Nico Corsetti visited me at the medical centre.

But when was the last timeIwas surprised? When someone surprisedmewith an item?

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