Page 51 of Selling Innocence

Ouch. It was true, of course, but having him tell me that so coldly made me have to force my smile. I didn’t want him to see how much it stung. It took me back to the Quad, who had also protected me because it was their job, their duty, a debt they’d had to my mother.

It’s never about who I am as a person, is it?

“I know,” I said, hoping my voice was strong, that he wouldn’t catch the way it wavered. “I know I’m just a client. That doesn’t mean I’m not grateful. If a doctor saves my life, I’m still happy they did it, even if it was because it’s their job. So, even though it’s just because you have to, I’m still glad.”

“Kenz…” Regret colored my name. Had he just realized how mean his comment had been?

Except, I didn’t need an apology from him. I didn’t need people to say sorry for the truth. We were all stuck in this world, all at the whims of the way things were.

Besides, it would only make me seem all the more pathetic as he tried to explain it away.

No thanks.

I closed the half-full dishwasher. “It’s fine. I’m going to make a plate and take it to Vance.”

“Why?”

“Because he didn’t come to dinner. He needs to eat, after all.”

Hayden said nothing while I piled food onto the dish, then set silverware on the edge. I grabbed a water bottle and tucked it beneath my arm.

I recalled the look on Vance’s face, the silent way he’d stared out of the window in the car after the interview. Then he hadn’t come to dinner? I couldn’t shake the worry about it.

Hayden spoke softly as I passed him. “You shouldn’t get too close to us.”

I paused, but kept my gaze forward. What was I supposed to say back to that?

He went on. “We aren’t the sort of people you should interact with more than needed. Remember how you got here, Kenz, and the world we live in. Your best bet is to do as your told, keep your distance, and go back to your own life when this is all over.”

“I’ll go back to my life when this is over, but that doesn’t change anything for now. I can’t ignore someone in pain.”

He didn’t stop me when I walked out, headed up the stairs, then down the hallway that led to Vance’s room, Hayden’s warning echoing in my head.

I hadn’t gone into Vance’s room yet. I’d seen Tor’s room, since I’d spent the first night there, until they set up my own room and felt sure I wouldn’t run. That was it, though.

And why did I feel nervous about it?

Vance and I had a certain comfort between us by this point. It wasn’t a happy comfort, of course, but more of an understanding. It was like a pap smear—I hated it, but I knew what would happen so it wasn’t that stressful.

Yet somehow, after the way he’d looked at that interview, it made me anxious about intruding on his personal space.

The man’s words could come out vicious when he wanted them to.

I knocked on his door, the plate balanced on my other hand. No answer came.

Had he gone out? Maybe I just hadn’t heard it?

A crash inside made me frown. Guess not.

Standing outside wouldn’t do a thing, so I gathered my courage, twisted the handle and pushed open the door.

I’d expected his room to be spotless. He seemed as though he didn’t care what people though, but at the same time, he always appeared flawless. I assumed that would continue with his room.

Boy was I wrong…

Except, as I peered around the room, I realized it wasn’t just general messiness. Clothes weren’t strewn across the floor or trash piled high on surfaces. Instead, white scraps of fabric were all over.

No, not fabric. I recognized it after a moment. The only thing out of place in the room were the scraps of canvas.

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