Page 44 of Stray

“You completely invaded her privacy. What the fuck?” I wince and look away.

“I know, but I needed to know, and now… Now, I don’t know how to look at her and not see that photo. I don’t know how to look at her the same way.”

“She is still the same woman.” Derek offers, and I roll my eyes.

“You haven’t seen what I have.”

“And you shouldn’t have seen what you did,” he hisses, grabbing me by my shirt collar and taking me out of the garage. I’m mildly aware of him telling Jensen to go back to bed before we start walking in silence. I don’t know where we are going until I see our lake glittering in the night.

“If you brought me out here to get a hand–”

“I’ll kill you if you finish that sentence,” Derek warns through clenched teeth, and I smirk, remembering finding him and his girlfriend out here earlier this year stargazing or some shit. I watch him pick up a rock and skip it across the water lazily.

“Two skips, you’re rusty as fuck.” I taunt, causing him to snort.

“Keep talking, big man,” he gets ready to toss another one but stops and looks at it. He gets some weird look on his face before stuffing it into his pocket. I’m about to ask why he is collecting rocks when he brings me back to why we are out here. “I know about Ozzy,” he states while walking over to the dock and sitting down.

“How?”

“Indy told me about her. I guess shortly after getting out of the hospital, Ozzy went through a rough patch. She was still addicted to whatever those fuckers were pumping her with and was trying to cut off cold turkey. So she was hurting, withdrawing and everything else, and she was going to kill herself. Indy saw Ozzy sitting on a bench. She was on vacation with her mom and walked over because, well, you know, Indy—a stranger is just an undiscovered best friend,” He rolls his eyes in annoyance, but I can tell he finds it endearing. It’s hard not to find Indy endearing. “Anyway, she went over and just started talking to Ozzy. Apparently, she wouldn’t shut up for like forty-five minutes about nothing important. Ozzy broke down, started wailing, and collapsed onto Indy, telling her everything. She told her she was scared because she didn’t think she could press charges against the men, she didn’t think she could stay clean, or that she could continue to live. Indy listened to it all and then took her to get a cupcake.”

“She’s going to hate me when she finds out I looked,” I admit, feeling the guilt and shame surface.

“She won’t be happy, I’m sure. Ozzy has probably told you a lot, but she did so when she felt comfortable. You’ve taken that away from her, and we both know you ain’t going to be able to lie and fake it. Your best bet is to tell her the truth.” I groan and shake my head.

“You ever feel too old for this shit?” Derek lets out a dry laugh.

“Little brother, I’m forty-five with a girlfriend two decades younger than me. I am always too old for all the shit in my life. Now, come on, I’m gonna need breakfast before we start moving pops and chores. Then I gotta help the guys work on the side house before packing to return home.”

* * *

“You got him?” I ask as Jensen and Derek carry Pops in his wheelchair down the steps. I try my best to keep my emotions neutral as I stare at the frail man.

“Yeah,” Jensen sighs as he sets the bottom of the wheelchair down. “Easy.” He gives Pops a pat before Derek wheels him to his hospital bed that we moved down here by the large windows overlooking the field.

“Alright!” Ozzy clasps her hands together once we get him in his bed. “Now see, we can watch movies on the big screen!” I watch her drop into a seat next to his bed, propping her feet up on his mattress. I’m surprised when Pops pats her sock-covered feet with his hand, and she doesn’t flinch away. Though I shouldn’t be shocked, she and Dad are very close, despite the shitty things I said to her the other day. I cringe, remembering my harsh words. It’s obvious how much she cares for Pops and how much he cares for her, which says something because the last person he allowed into our circle was Theo.

“Now that I’m down here,” Pops’ voice is so tired, but I can hear the excitement he’s trying to put on. “Maybe you’ll get out of my ass a little. Let me do my own thing.” Ozzy scoffs while shoving him with her toe.

“Please, old man, you adore me, and you know it. Now I’m going to go shower, and then I’m feeding you, and you’re gonna eat what I bring you whether you like it or not..” She warns before standing up and walking past me. As she does so, our fingers brush, sending a current through me. I want to grab her. I want to kiss her in front of everyone and tell her I adore her. I continue to stare forward towards my ailing father, who chuckles as he rests his head back.

“You gonna stare at me like a roadside car crash? Don’t tell me all the chores are done out there.” My brothers all chuckle and start filing out, leaving me alone with the old man. “I wasn’t just talking ’bout your brothers.” He states as he looks out the window.

“Yeah, I know. I was just going to talk to Ozzy for a second.” Pops cracks open his eye and looks at me.

“She’s a good girl.” His voice is tired but holds a firm warning. A warning I hear loud and clear.

Do not hurt her.

“She is,” I nod, suddenly feeling overly hot. “She’s been through–”

“Hell,” he replies sharply. “She’s been through hell, and she’s come out the other side.”

“Yeah,” I say softly and sit in Ozzy’s chair. “She’s got a few demons that latched on when she came out, too.”

“Well, of course she does!” Pops scoffs. “You think you can go through hell and not come out without some demons? I know she’s only told me the minimum, but I see those scars and her eyes.”

“I looked her up on the computer,” I admit before I realize I’m doing it. Tripping over my words, I continue. “I-I don’t know what I was thinking. But I did. I read… Pops, they had photos and videos–”

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