Page 72 of House of Deceit

“Maybe next time you don’t take ten years off my life, and I’ll let you do the washing.”

I open my mouth to snark back at him, but I’m interrupted by the announcement horn. Keith and I look at each other and stop what we are doing.

“What do you think that’s for?” he asks.

“I don’t know, but it had better end in ice cream or something fun.”

He offers me his arm, which I take, as we walk to the living room.

“Hello, deceivers!” Jacob Jacobson calls. His suit is sunshine yellow and similarly burns my retinas.

“Hey, J.J.,” someone responds.

“What’s up, J squared,” another says.

“Today, we have a special surprise for you, house guests. We are over halfway through the competition. In celebration, we would like to offer you a chance to work together as a house! The prize? A DJ will be brought in to host a party!”

Molly and I cheer the loudest. Anything that is outside of the norm is a welcome distraction.

We all stand in a circle beside the pool, vaguely looking from one to another. The countdown on the screen sits there ominously. We shift from one foot to another. I look at Parker, who winks at me. His commitment to our farce has been perfect and, while we haven’t kissed since last week, we make sure to exchange little touches to show intimacy the audience might be missing out on. I think of Alec as I trace a finger down his forearm, wishing it was him before focusing back on the group.

“We just need to pick someone to start,” I say.

“You do it, then,” Penelope says.

“Fine.”

I grab the Lifesaver off the table in front of me and open the wrapper. Molly snatches up the box of toothpicks, taking one and passing them around. We all open them, putting them in our mouths. I put the Lifesaver on the end of mine and check to make sure everyone is ready. I tuck my hands behind my back and turn to Parker. The clock starts counting down and we begin.

He bends his knees and goes cross-eyed trying to stick his toothpick through the hole of the Lifesaver. I would laugh if not for the game. Parker lunges a bit and I give a mumbled yelp as he sticks me in the cheek. After a few shallow stabs, he finally gets it through the hole. I tip my head down as he tips his head back and the Lifesaver transfers to his toothpick. With a whole minute taken off the clock.

“Nine minutes left,” I tell everyone as Parker turns toward Keith.

With their hands behind their backs, they lean toward each other like they are going to share a passionate kiss. I giggle as they lean in and the Lifesaver drops to the floor. Everyone groans. I grab the circle candy and put the toothpick back in my mouth. We have eight and a half minutes left to transfer the candy from one toothpick to another without dropping it.

Everyone waits in anticipation for their turn.

“Act like you’re in one of Charlie’s slutty novels and you’re about to kiss the man you’ve had a crush on for months,” Molly directs Pen as she tries to get the candy from the unenthusiastic Cain.

The clock counts down the last few seconds as the candy moves and we all wait with bated breath.

My mouth is dry, and my head pounds like my brain is being mined for gold. I pull the blanket over my head, blocking out as much of the sun as I can. There is a foot under the blanket with me, and it must be Courtney’s. The weirdest dream mixed with the desire to throw up woke me up. I try to make a mental note to never drink tequila again, but the miners must be chiseling away at that piece of my brain right now because as soon as I have the thought, it’s gone.

“Court? Are you alive?”

The blankets start groaning and the foot kicks me in the nose.

“Cock sucking son of a bitch!” I sit up in bed before immediately flopping back down with a groan, holding my nose. My eyes water from the pain and the brightness as I realize this is not my room. I would never paint a wall white.

“It wasn’t a dream,” I whisper to myself. “Hey, Molly, you twat! You kicked me in the nose!”

“What do?” she asks.

“Huh?”

“What?”

She moves again, this time kicking me in the stomach.

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