Page 54 of Scapegoat

“You drove me fucking nuts when we were kids,” Jayden said in a low, urgent voice, his fingers trailing through the water to caress me. “I’d sneak glances at you, dripping wet, at the way your tank tops would cling to your tits.”

“Fuck’s sake, Jay,” Xavier growled, coming closer.

“Like you didn’t do the same,” his brother shot back, before pressing a kiss to the back of my neck. “I wanted to tell you to strip off; even more, I wanted to peel every damn stitch off your skin so you were bare for us.” He shifted closer, so I could feel that he’d stripped off his jeans before jumping. “So I could see those ripe little tits right before I kissed them.”

“What?” I pushed myself up out of the water to turn to face him. “These tits?” Jay looked spellbound, staring down at my wet curves with wide-eyed fascination and I used that distracted state to my advantage as I launched myself at him.

Water fights with the boys were always tough for me to win, because they were so much bigger and stronger than me, so I’d always had to use whatever means I could to take them down. I shoved Jay’s head under the water, not holding him down for long, only enough time for him to emerge spluttering. But when his eyes narrowed, I knew it was on. I threw myself backwards, Xavier catching me in a reflex motion, and I clambered onto his back as Jayden attacked. Xavier batted him away, then as the two of them clashed, I was swept away by Atlas. He held me close as the other two fought, too evenly matched to be much of a competition, though I enjoyed the sight of every muscle popping as they wrestled.

“No one ever wins on their own,” he said to me, holding my gaze when I met his eyes. “We make terrible lone wolves, always needing to hunt in a pack.” He set me then on a large rock before wading back in, coming to Xavier’s aid to drag Jayden down into the water, but when he emerged again with a shake of his head, he yelled at Atlas to help him to get Xavier and the two of them did the same to their brother.

Sitting there, shivering in the cold, it was easy to pretend. That nothing had happened, that this was the end of summer not the end of winter. That the choosing would still take place. But as I watched them wrestle and throw each other around in the water, I knew. That was the thing about becoming an adult. You finally realised that there was no one around who was going to tell you what to do and when to do it, that your life was your own to make of it what you could. So I got to my feet and stood tall on the rock, their horseplay stopping and their eyes following me the moment I did. And I jumped, this time under my own steam, not Xavier’s, knowing that they’d move to catch me.

And they did.

Chapter 32

Sometime later, we were all snuggled down into one big swag to watch the sun set. It was a tight fit, but no one would volunteer to lie down on one of the other mattresses, so I was plenty warm as I watched the sky become stained with gold, orange and purple. Lying there wedged in tight between Atlas and Jayden, the feel of their hot, hot bodies was distracting and reassuring at the same time.

“So is this the way that day would’ve ended, if it wasn’t for our parents?” I asked them idly.

“Mm…” Jayden pressed his lips to the crown of my head before turning towards me. “Almost.”

“Don’t go grinding on my mate,” Xavier grumbled. “I don’t want your lily white arse shoved into my leg.”

“He’s just jealous.” Jayden’s voice was low and husky as he kissed me once, twice. “But Xave can jerk off while we—”

“Food,” Atlas said, staring out at the sky, then back at me. “We would have brought you food, back then.”

My stomach grumbled as if on cue, and I slapped my hand over it with a sheepish smile.

“We can pack this up, head back to town.” Xavier sat up, starting to pull blankets off us. “If you’re hungry—”

“One missed meal isn’t going to kill us,” I told him, waiting to snuggle into Jayden until Xavier had settled back down. “And what else?”

I was teasing him, them, because I knew what would happen. The same thing that had happened last time we were at a lookout. But Jay just chuckled, cradling me in his arms.

“Whatever you want,” he said in a low voice, stroking his hand down my back. “You know that.”

But right as I was simmering in that feeling of warmth, of simmering heat, Xavier was the voice of reason.

“But not now. We’ve got work in the morning, with a long, hard day of shearing ahead of us, so if we’re not going out for food, then we need sleep.”

I wouldn’t have thought that possible, that my body was wound too tight by the press of theirs, but as quiet fell over us, the sun dropping lower and lower, my eyes followed it, finally closing and going dark right as the sky did the same.

It was my habit to dream of the guys, all the time. Often in frustrating dreams where I woke up screaming, or sad ones when I burst into tears as soon as I opened my eyes. But this one was hot, sensuous, made of a thousand little caresses. I was slowly, slowly coaxed out of sleep with feather light touches, reminding me I had a body, then of the pleasure it could feel.

When my eyelids fluttered open, I saw the world was covered in that light grey haze, heralding the end of night, even if the day hadn’t quite started. So there was enough light that I could see Jayden staring down at me, his face shadowy and indistinct, all except for his eyes, burning bright silver. He watched my mouth fall open as I felt him slowly trace the shape of my nipple with one finger, so that I felt the moment when the skin crinkled and the point became a hard bead, exacerbated by his finger and thumb gripping it and then giving it a little tug.

Pleasure burst between my legs, in time with his caress, my body shifting in response to each pull of his fingers. Atlas muttered something in his sleep, then rolled over, pinning me to the spot. Jay just grinned as his brother unwittingly kept me right where he wanted me.

It was torturous, feeling Jay’s fingers, as he circled them, moved them to slide up, across my collarbone, down the slope of my shoulder, then back up, pausing when I shivered at the feel of him touching my mating mark, then circling it. Heat flushed all over me, sweat prickling. I was now uncomfortably hot, but not enough to throw Atlas and the blankets off.

Because part of me felt like if I did, this would all go away, that the boys might vanish—like the fae—overnight, leaving me alone, naked and aching in an empty field. But my lovers were wolf shifters, not the fickle fae, so rather than disappear with the first light of the morning, he leaned forward, kissing me so softly, so carefully, that it felt like it was someone else. Not my reckless Jay.

And then I realised that it might be because he was taking other risks.

His hands shifted again, covering both of my breasts with an abruptness that made me jump. Atlas snorted in his sleep at my sudden movement, then burrowed his face back down, groaning into my hair. I could feel him hot and hard as he pressed into my hip. And Jay just smiled, pulling both nipples, that biting pleasure forcing me to move, writhe against Atlas, my clit throbbing in sympathy, right up until I inadvertently woke him up.

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