Page 46 of Scapegoat

That I didn’t miss the three musketeers by my side, helping me to negotiate it.

But I crossed my arms and then nodded to him, like Atlas was a stranger or something. Though that wasn’t enough to stop Atlas Campbell for coming back for more. He moved forward slowly, as if I was a skittish animal, about to take off. And when I thought of that, I realised how apt that was. My whole body trembled with the effort of holding myself back. Because the wolf? She shifted restlessly inside me, torn between wanting to bound over to him.

Or rip his face off.

“I can’t promise I’m not gonna fuck up again, because I know I will, but…” I frowned slightly as I watched his Adam’s apple bob. “You know I’ll always try to make it up to you. Whatever you want, Princess, I’ll do it, I promise—”

I stared at him then, hard. Atlas was telling me everything I’d wanted to hear, so why wasn’t I falling to my knees before him, wrapping my arms around his legs? My heart lightened, the fickle little bitch, that strange feeling taking me a while to identify as hope. But I smothered it ruthlessly, just as Mum had done to all of my hopes before.

“I want you to go out into the world,” I said, hating the fact my voice was all quavery, “and live your life.” I dared a smile, even if it felt like my face was cracking. “I want you to be happy, Atlas.”

“That’s never gonna happen, not without you,” he told me, fangs flashing.

“It is. You can. You will.” I let out a sigh. “Or you won’t. I can’t control that, only you can.” I reached over and patted his arm awkwardly, like we were just acquaintances or something. “All I can say is good luck with that.”

But anything I might have had to say was choked off by his grip. He grabbed me, hauling me closer, pulling me up into his arms and wrapping them around me, holding me so damn tight I could barely take a breath. I fought his hold, his touch, him, the feeling of sweet, sweet connection—

“You might want to put the girl down, mate.”

I looked over Atlas’ shoulder to see Jamie had arrived. She shot me a wry smile, then placed a hand on her hip.

“And as I’m guessing you’re the one who put my girl through the fucking wringer in the first place, you might want to step back as well.”

Atlas let me go, but it was to whirl around, to get in her face. Jamie just took in his silver eyes and fangs with a steady look. She’d seen me shift, so it was no longer a big surprise.

“You ready to get out of here, kid?” she asked me.

“My stuff is by the front door,” I told her. “I’ll just go and grab it.”

Chapter 27

“You sure about this?” Jamie asked me.

Atlas was stalking back to the main house, not having said another word after looking at me with a pleading, anguished expression on his face. She watched him go for a few seconds, then looked back at me.

“Of course.” I forced myself to smile. “You came out all this way—”

“That doesn’t mean nothing, not if your heart is here.”

She didn’t mean on this farm or in this cottage. She knew I didn’t put down roots anywhere. Jamie meant Atlas, and, so, she just stood there, her expression the same as it always was. Quiet, still, patient, ready to listen. Sometimes it felt like she was a blank slate on which I projected all of my crap.

But not now.

“Is it, Kai?”

“What do you mean?” I tried to smile, to brush her off, but that’s the thing about people who’ve seen you at your worst and then stuck around. They’re not scared off by your pain, nor will they be fobbed off. She didn’t ask any more questions, just stood watching, waiting for me to answer. “I…”

I had an answer, right? It’d seemed so fucking clear a moment ago. Jamie had to have heard some of what was said, if she’d been there for the last bit, so she knew… But none of that would work, I knew, so I walked over to the front wall of the cottage and then slid myself down until I was sitting on the porch. I heard Jamie’s boots hit the floorboards, then her sigh as she settled down beside me.

“We should get going,” I said. “Your job—”

“I ended up palming it off to someone else,” she replied, then shrugged when I looked at her. “They’d just dropped off a load nearby and were looking for a paying job to take them back home, so don’t use me as an excuse.” She nudged me with an elbow. “He the one you were running from?”

One of them, I wanted to say, but I didn’t. I just nodded.

“Good looking bloke, if you like them young. They got that weird, too smooth look that’s not for me. Kinda like a car that’s just been driven off the lot, hasn’t been broken in yet.” I snorted at that, smiling despite myself, and she joined me. “So, what does your wolf think about him?”

I’d told her about my other side, even showed her what it was like to take fur one day when we stopped right near a forest of trees. She’d lost her lunch in the grass, because apparently the process was pretty horrific. But she’d scratched my furry ears and I’d wagged my tail, the wolf liking her just fine. She knew what family was and Jamie fitted the bill far better than my mother.

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