Page 42 of Dr. CEO (The Doctors)

“Lump sum? What lump sum?”

“I spoke to him this afternoon. Told him I wasn’t interested in the properties Mr. Wilde was showing. I explained about Wayton and that’s when he said he’d give me a lump sum toward the purchase of one. He doesn’t want to buy a flat, which is completely understandable.”

Anxiety knots in my throat and my breathing turns shallow. It’s happening again. I take a deep breath and try to focus on what Granny’s saying. “When were you going to tell me about this?”

“I’m telling you now. Anyway, no decisions have been made yet. I’m still to see the place. But I know a couple of people who have already paid deposits—”

“People from the staff cottages?”

“No, no,” she says. “Friends I have in other villages. The world is bigger than Crompton, my darling. It would be nice to be closer to them.”

“You won’t miss your friends from the Crompton Estate? You won’t miss living next door to me?”

“Well, I do hope you’ll visit.” Her grin’s mischievous. Until now, her smile has always made me feel safe, like we’re a team with an inside joke—us against the world. But now all I can do is wonder whether I’ll get to see that smile as often.

“It’s four miles away. Is there even a bus that goes to Wayton?”

“You used to have a driving license. You could get a car,” Granny says.

Whenever she’s suggested this before, I’ve always assured her there’s absolutely no need for me to have a car. I never go anywhere beyond walking distance. There’s never any need. But now? Granny would be a car ride away. And she’s getting older.

“Visiting isn’t the same as living next door.”

“You’re quite correct. It isn’t the same. It’s different. It might be better. This is just a different chapter, my darling. I know it’s frightening. But have you thought that it might be time? Crompton has helped you heal. It’s kept you safe. Maybe now’s the time for a little adventure. And perhaps a new job is the start of that new adventure. Two new jobs.” She laughs.

“Change is supposed to happen incrementally,” I say. “I’m not supposed to lose my home, my job and my granny all together.”

She reaches across the table and squeezes my hand. “You’re not losing me. I’m just going to be a few miles away. And there’s a new invention called the telephone. I hear it’s terribly easy to use.”

I rarely need to telephone Granny. But if she lives four miles away, it’s not like I’ll be able to pop round, just to let her know I’m home.

“And you’re going to come to Crompton three times a week to supervise the gardeners?”

She pauses and glances at me. “Maybe. But I’m sixty-eight. I might also take the opportunity to retire.”

The blood pounding in my ears falls silent like it’s frozen in shock. “Retire?”

“Onto my next chapter. You might think of this as your opportunity to turn the page and start a new chapter of your own.”

“But I like the one I’m in right now.”

“But it’s drawing to a close, my darling. Sometimes it’s our choice to turn the page. Sometimes life chooses for us. Neither way does it mean the next chapter won’t be better. More exciting.”

“I’ve done exciting,” I mumble. Granny retiring? Everything’s just falling apart.

“You’ve done chaos. And you may have a similar chapter in your future. There are no guarantees. But at the moment, what I see are incredible opportunities lining up for you. If you don’t grab one of them, or at least figure out what you want next, you’ll be left with whatever other people don’t want. No decision is still a decision. You can howl at the moon for the next few weeks while everyone else makes plans and comes to terms with the change at Crompton, or you can grieve that this part of your life is over and start planning for the next. Decide what you want. Work toward something better.”

Everything begins to blur together. The idea that Granny won’t be next door or working within shouting distance. The fact I won’t be surrounded by people that have known me my entire life. Singing along to musicals with Sandra won’t be a thing anymore. Neither will I get to see the wisteria bloom every spring.

It just feels so terribly sad. When I closed the last chapter of my life, it had been a relief to be over with it and I gladly moved on. But moving on when you don’t want to? When you never thought you’d have to? When you thought you’d found your happy place and want to stay in it forever? It’s far harder than anything I’ve ever done.

“I know things didn’t work out at university. But that was a long time ago now, and this will be different. You’re different.”

I don’t want to think about the last and only time I left Crompton since I came here full-time at seven. The memories just prove what I already know to be true: I belong here, at Crompton.

And if Crompton is where I belong, then I have to take the opportunities Vincent is giving me—the chance to make sure it all happens on time and according to plan. Maybe I’ll even get to influence the way things are done in this new version of my world. Though fear still grips my heart like a vise, a small voice inside is getting harder and harder to ignore. It’s the one whispering that if I can be brave, I might be able to stay connected to Crompton—and make sure it remains the safe haven it’s always been for me.

EIGHTEEN

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