Page 52 of When in Rome

I have three puppies staring back at me that all look as if I’ve just mercilessly kicked them. Madison is the first to attempt to recover the happy mood, but her voice sounds too peppy. “True. And…it’s not like we actually expected you—I mean Audrey—to stay in Rome for good. That’s impractical for your—HER career.”

“But now we know you—her—or…ugh. Forget it. We’re all talking about you, and we know it,” Annie says quietly, pulling that mood right back down. “And it’s going to be hard to say goodbye.”

“And Noah…” Emily adds, ensuring that the mood is now buried six feet under and completely unrecoverable. “He’ll have to say goodbye to you…just like Gregory Peck did with Audrey.” All our glittering eyes shift to the TV screen frozen on the downcast face of the man himself.

Oh, Gregory.How have I never realized before that this movie is a tragedy? It might as well be Shakespeare! GOD! How could Audrey just leave like that in the end?

I blink at the TV. “Maybe they stay in contact.”

“Uh-uh,” grunts Emily, clearly projecting when she says, “He has major trust issues. He’ll never have a long-distance relationship.”

“You know a lot about Gregory Peck’s character’s backstory?” I ask sarcastically.

Emily gives me a pointed look. “I know every bit of it. I know what he’s been through. I know that he deserves a woman who’s going to stick around and love him like he needs. And I know that erotic hallway hugs are not going to help the situation if Audrey knows she’s leaving in the end.”

Emily then takes a pillow to the face when Madison launches one from her pallet. “Mind your own biscuits, Em! Gregory wouldn’t want you meddling. He can make his own choices.”

“Gregoryhas been through a world of hurt, and I just don’t want to see him go through it again, because the last time a woman passed through this town and stole his heart, he uprooted his life to follow her, and then when he had no choice but to come home, she stomped on it, making him lose faith in all women!” Her eyes snap to me—expression softer than the one she’s giving her sister. “No offense to you, Amelia.”

I shake my head. “None taken.” And really, I don’t take offense to what she said, because in no way would I want to hurt Noah. Or anyone. And I think she’s right. There’s no way I can give Noah what he needs or wants. I’m about to set out on a nine-month world tour for goodness’ sake. Noah seems like a matching-rocking-chairs-and-multiple-children kind of guy.

Suddenly, my mind snags back on something Emily said. “Why did Noah have no choice but to come home?”

“Okayyyy!” Annie stands from the couch, grabs another one of the amazing spicy-chicken-calzone-things Madison made, and then settles back on the couch. “I think we’re getting off topic here.Gregorywould not like it if we were spilling all his beans during girls’ night.”

Madison barely contains a laugh. “You can’t sayspills his beansin reference to a man, Annie.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’ve heard men refer to their balls as beans sometimes.”

Annie gasps. “No.Why would they do that? That’s gross.”

Madison gives Emily a look. “This is why we need to take some trips and get out more. She needs to experience more of the world.”

“So I can learn more words for male genitalia? No, thank you,” says Annie, snuggling deeper into her blanket and munching on the calzone.

Emily raises a brow at Madison. “You haven’t seen the world and you seem to be doing just fine with terms for male anatomy.”

“But I could learn more! Just imagine. I could learn how to say balls in French! Italian! Spanish!”

Annietsks. “Audrey Hepburn would never say anything so crude.”

“Actually,” I interject, “Audrey was a call girl in another movie. That’s what’s so great about her. She’s unpredictable. You’ll see her in a ball gown in one movie, and a man’s oversized shirt with no pants in another. And in her personal life, she had a baby deer for a pet.”

“That’s it. I want to be her.” Madison holds her hand up and begins ticking items off her fingers. “She travels. Has an incredible fashion sense. And would definitely teach me the word for balls in French.”

“Why do you think I’m always turning to Audrey when I feel lost?” I don’t mention how watching Audrey movies also makes me feel close to my mom again when I miss her.

Madison points at me. “YES. I’m doing that from now on. I need a life coach and she seems like the closest thing.”

Emily scoffs. “I thought I was your life coach?”

“Self-appointedlife coach.”

“But a life coach no less,” Emily says grinning.

Madison does not return her sister’s smile. “You turned me into a teacher.”

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