Page 34 of The Comeback Tour

“Go for it.” Hayley points to the piles of merch. “I’m gonna finish setting up.”

“Thanks,” I say. It’s a perfect time to casually see what I can find out about Brenda and I decide to take advantage of the opportunity.

“Do you ever have friends come out to the shows? I saw Chris put some names down on the guest list tonight.”

“Nah. My friends are too cool to be at a 5 Leo Hearts member show. Don’t get me wrong—Jax is awesome. But my friends and I are into punk rock.” She points to the skateboard on her T-shirt.

I’m gonna just cut right to it. “Harry was mentioning something about a girl named Brenda on this list.”

“Boozy Brenda? She came to every show back in the day and hit on Jax. Like hardcore.”

“And what does Jax do?” I’m hoping I don’t seem jealous, just curious. I mean, I don’t really have a right to be jealous. But I don’t like the way the sound of Brenda’s name makes me feel.

“He usually brushes her off. But I heard that the last show, when 5 Leo Hearts did a few events for charity, was a little different.”

“How so?” I don’t like the sound of that either.

“Well, it’s basically his job to flirt with the fans, right? So, he had some fun with her, I guess. Like played along for a night. Honestly, he was probably bored.”

“What do you mean by played along?” Does Jax still hook up with random girls when he is bored on tour? I didn’t get that impression from him. I wonder if I’m his next cure for boredom.

“He just got a little flirty, had his arms around her.” Hayley places shirts on the table in front of her. “Not sure if they ever hooked up.”

“Oh. I see.” That leaves me back to square one.

“If she’s on the list, Jax must not care if she comes back.”

“Got it.” I begin to make my way out from behind the merch area. Jax might not care. But I do. And I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel about that.

In a huff, I head in the direction of the tour buses, but get side-tracked. I hear an acoustic guitar. Then Jax’s voice soars through the air. I follow the sounds to the stage. The arena is empty. It’s breathtaking being on the other side of the stage. I’m taken back to my days of concert going, and one special night in particular—the first time Jax saw me, only he doesn’t know it.

“Cailin, grab my hand,” Gemma yelled over the roar of the crowd. I reached for her but my fingers slipped away each time I got close. Girls dressed in matching homemade “I Love 5 Leo Hearts” shirts kept pushing their way between us, as if crushing us would get them to the stage any faster. They were such amateurs. It must have been their first concert.

“It’s time,” I yelled to Gemma as my hand finally locked in hers. Gemma pulled me towards her and I took out a few girls in our path as we moved from the center of the crowd to the side. This meant war.

“Everyone, move out of the way,” Gemma bellowed. “My friend is going to throw up. Hurry!”

I clasped my hands over my mouth, pretending I was about to hurl. Horrified faces glanced at me and quickly stepped aside, parting the sea of people so Gemma and I had a clear path for a few seconds. We were almost to the front of the stage.

Then we got stuck behind some older girls in high heels. There was no way we were going to be able to see the guys over their heads, let alone take pictures. I snuck my good camera in my bra that night, and we were going to get our picture with the band. We just needed to get to the front row.

I spotted security guards moving the barrier to the right of us. This was our chance. As the masses headed towards the new space that was being opened up, Gemma and I ran hand in hand to the sliver of empty floor space up ahead. We sighed and high-fived. We did it, again.

A spotlight hit the stage and the opening notes of 5 Leo Hearts’ new single blasted across the arena. Cheers erupted and all the girls in the front row, including me, threw our hands up towards the stage. The members of 5 Leo Hearts floated down from the ceiling to the stage.

My heart skipped a beat as I took in their coordinating outfits. Jax was wearing a shirt with black fishnet and I could see his chest glistening underneath. It was obvious he slathered on oil before getting dressed, and I wondered what it would be like to slide my hands over his tight pecs.

The guys landed safely on stage, clipped off their harnesses, and made their way over to the front row. It was time to whip out my camera and sneak a photo before security saw and yelled at me, or even worse, took my camera. But I knew if I took out my camera, then I wouldn’t be able to throw my hand up and have the possibility of Jax touching it when he ran his hands across everyone lined up in the front row. I would miss the chance to experience the spark of his touch. It was such a dilemma.

“Get your camera,” Gemma said. She nudged me in the ribs.

I shoved my hand down my bra and fidgeted to grab my camera. That’s when it happened. Jax stepped in front of me, his gorgeous body towering over mine. He looked down just as I looked up at him, with my hand awkwardly cupping my left breast. I was mortified. And I was missing the ultimate photo op.

“Cailin!” Gemma said. She nudged me again. “You just missed the perfect moment.”

But she was wrong. The perfect moment had just happened and has been preserved in my memory. Jax Slater winked at me.

Now, I’m part of the team that brings this experience to life. That makes millions? of girls across the world happy. A few hours in a bubble, where you forget everything else going on in your life and just live the lyrics being sung out on stage. Tonight, Jax is going to vulnerably open his heart to strangers and share details of the past years of his life through chorus and verse. I can only imagine what that feels like.

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