Page 119 of We Finished Here

I got half tanked and dribbled God knows how much shit to her.

I’m not at all impressed with myself as I stir. I have a huge two weeks coming up, and this isn’t how any of it was supposed to go.

I will be sluggish now because I broke my cardinal rule with drinking.

I’m a fucking idiot.

Still, it doesn’t stop me from breathing into her hair and stroking my hand up her arm.

Taking her in before the madness of the cup final starts.

It’s still surreal she’s even here, and that she stayed.

I definitely said some things to her that I’m not proud of.

She stirs a little, probably from my movements, and I watch her in the darkness.

There’s nothing I would rather be doing right now than watching her dream, but something tugs in my heart, and I know I am getting way too attached.

I feel like I’m drowning in her.

“You okay?” She breathes sleepily.

“Yeah,” I whisper back. I’m still so fucking confused about everything. Nothing’s changed there.

“You threw a bottle of Jack in the lake,” are the next words out of her mouth.

My chest rumbles as I laugh. “I know. Fuck.”

She laughs too.

I kiss her head. “Thank you for staying.”

“I wanted to, Taylor.”

“I fucked up last night, I know it.”

I feel her shake her head. “You’re only human, Tay. You are allowed your moment. And if anything, you’re the saint, not me.”

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way. You’re fucking perfect.”Too fucking perfect.

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

I take a breath. My head keeps telling me that getting close to her is a dangerous thing, and I should protect my heart at all costs. But my heart fucking wants her more and more.

Even if I have professed I still love her, we’ve made no re-commitment to each other. I don’t want to let her go, but after only one week of her being here on vacation, there hasn’t been long enough time to know what’s going to happen. Everything has taken off so fast.

“You know I gotta reel things in for the finals,” I say. I know it’s coming out of left field for her, but I have to make it this way.

I feel her head lift to look at me. “Reel things in?”

I run a hand through my hair. I don’t want to sound like an ass, but I figure it’s a given no matter how I say it. “There’s so fucking much going on in my head, Em. I don’t know which way is up. I can’t go to Vegas messed up like this.”

“Am I messing things up?”

“No, I didn’t mean that…” I put my hand on her hip. I don’t even know what I mean anymore.

“You can say if I am. I don’t want to mess your head up when you have the Stanley Finals right on the horizon.”

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