Page 11 of Shadow

Fuck, did I even know how to cry?

“Mind some company?” Hope said, sitting in the lounge chair next to me as she placed a small radio on the table between us.

“Not at all,” I smiled at her. “Whatcha got there?”

“I found this beauty at a thrift store in Wichita Falls,” my sister said, petting the small radio. “Just needed a good cleaning and some tender loving care. Now, she works like a charm.”

Shaking my head, I chuckled. “Hope, you know how old that thing is. Hell girl, it’s older than the both of us.”

“And it’s perfect,” she said, sticking her tongue out at me. “I hope you don’t mind, but my favorite show is about to start.”

Shaking my head, I tipped back the beer I’d been nursing, taking a small swig. “Nope. Knock yourself out. Just came to visit, not disrupt what you all do.”

Static filled the air as Hope tuned the radio station she was looking for. Finding it, she sighed, then leaned back in her chair. “It’s pretty here. There are so many stars out tonight.”

“Yep.”

“Zeke?”

“Yeah, sweetheart.”

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me too, baby girl.”

“Good evening, everybody. I hope everyone is doing well tonight. You’ve got Lady Luck here and we have a lot going on this evening. You’re listening to the Lady Luck Show on Truth Refugee Radio. I want to thank everyone for tuning in, so let’s just jump on in…”

Sitting up, I stared at the radio, entranced by the sultry voice coming out of the small box. Every word she spoke felt like a caress against my soul. I could actually feel her words feather across my skin. It was an odd feeling. The more she talked, I felt myself becoming calm and more relaxed, almost as if her voice alone had wrapped me in a protective cocoon, making all the voices fade away.

“Who is that?” I whispered, too afraid to move.

“Her name is Lady Luck. I found her a few years ago when I was going through a bad time. She’s amazing. The stuff she talks about makes you really think.”

“Truth Refugee Radio? I think I saw a poster for that when I filled my tank up near in Dallas.”

“Oh, they have posters and signs everywhere around here. It’s a very popular radio station. They talk about everything, from current news to the latest farming techniques. Faith and I like Lucky because she talks about all things spiritual. Not just in the Christian sense, but in a wider, more broad sense. She talks about how we are all part of the universe. That everything we do leaves a footprint in time.”

Leaning back against the deck chair, I muttered, “Sounds a little cooky to me.”

“Maybe for some. Not everyone believes the same thing, Zeke. I don’t think any less of you because you’re Catholic. I still respect you even though Momma raised us atheist. Everyone has a right to believe and feel what they want. Those who are curious will seek the truth.”

“I respect everyone.”

Hope smirked, “Really? Zeke, do you even know what the word respect means?”

“It means to be nice to people.”

“No, it doesn’t. By definition, respect means a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements. It means to have due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others. To be that person, to truly be that person, commands a lot of strength from within. Many people say they respect others, but in truth, they don’t. One of my favorite sayings is to treat others as you want to be treated.”

“So, what you’re saying is, if I’m an ass, then everyone has the right to be an ass to me.”

Hope laughed. “It’s not about rights, Zeke. If you are disrespectful to someone, you expect them to return in kind. But it’s the other person’s choice to behave as they wish. Just because you are being mean doesn’t mean they have to.”

“Kind of like how the bible says turn the other cheek.”

“In a way, yes. Lucky is really good at expanding the mind to look past the obvious. People are going to act as they want. I can’t stop them, but I can affect how I react. They can be the meanest, most angry person on the planet and I can still respect them.”

“That makes no sense, Hope. Why would you respect someone like that?”