Page 54 of Make Me Love You

Chapter Fifteen

Everything was falling into place, if Emma ignored that Eli-shaped cloud looming in the peripheral corners of her mind, threatening to ruin her calm.

Yesterday’s uncomfortable epiphany had changed the mood between them. She had tried to act like nothing had happened, like the word mistake hadn’t triggered a come-to-Jesus moment in her soul. But Emma had never been very good at faking anything, and she could tell she hadn’t succeeded yesterday, either. A few times she had caught him watching her with a question in his eyes. But he had never asked, letting her keep the pretense.

So she would keep the pretense. Eli was a problem that would work itself out when the election was over. He would be her ex-best friend who had betrayed her and ruined her dad’s life. And she would be his favorite mistake.

Her heart still burned a little at the thought.

But it would all be fine. Everything would go back to normal.

Except...except it wouldn’t, could it? Because normal, until a month ago, meant she hated Eli, and she didn’t entirely feel that way about him now. It had been so easy then. So easy to hate him from up there on her high horse, judging him for his human frailties. Hate was a lot harder to pull off now, realizing just how her own frailties had brought them both down in the muck.

And if she didn’t hate him, where did that leave her? Where did that leave them?

Was she supposed to just exist in the same damn town as him, never being able to talk to him, to touch him, without all that steely hate driving her on? She didn’t know if she could do that.

But she would have to.

And despite her flaws, Emma was pretty good at doing what she had to do.

Right now, doing what she had to do meant pushing thoughts of Eli aside and getting her job done.

“What’s with that look on your face, Emma?” Suzie asked next to her. “Are you okay?”

“What look?” As if she didn’t know.

It was a gorgeous summer day, the kind that gave Emma a bone-deep sense of peace and gratitude. The sky was nothing but blue as far as the eye could see. Hart’s Mountain was a deep emerald green, and beyond that were layers of blue ridges that lived up to their name. The Blue Ridge Mountains. She was lucky to live here.

It was the perfect day for canvassing, as Suzie called it. Emma preferred to think of it as listening. The idea of going door-to-door, telling her neighbors that had known her since she was in diapers a list of reasons why she was better than Eli made her squirm. But she could listen to what they had to say. She could learn about their problems, and help come up with solutions.

“It’s a complicated look,” Suzie said. “A little sad. A little annoyed. Kind of horny.”

Emma and Kate stopped in their tracks and turned slowly to stare at her.

“Not going to lie, I’m a little disturbed by the implication that you know what Emma looks like when she’s horny,” Kate said.

“Fine. I don’t know if Emma is horny. It’s me, okay? I’m horny. And it’s not fair,” Suzie groused. “I spent the first three months spewing up everything I swallowed. I spent the next three months—the second trimester, where everything is supposed to feel great, mind you—I spent it with sciatica that hurt so bad I could barely go up stairs. And now that I’m finally feeling good, I’m horny as hell.”

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