Page 1 of Forever By Morning

Chapter1

Helena

A Different Point of View

Watching the man you thought you were going to marry dip his bride in an epic swoon-worthy kiss had to be one of the worst case scenarios in the history of my life.

The fact that I was standing up for the woman as an emergency bridesmaid wasn’t something I saw coming either. And yet, here I was.

I tucked my small bouquet of tulips and daisies into the crook of my arm and clapped with the rest of the guests as the officiant smiled hugely and lifted his voice over the cheering crowd. “May I introduce, Mr. and Mrs. Clay Winslow!”

A tiny ball of pain tightened in my chest at the announcement.

Had I really believed that would be my future one day? Or had it been a handy shield so I didn’t have to deal with my less than certain idea of forever?

The chapel emptied out before I could examine that one way trip to the therapist’s couch thought. Again, I was left alone at the proverbial altar. The sun blasted through the stained glass leaving a trail of trampled apple blossoms in squares of purple, yellow, and blue on the snowy white runner.

I should have followed the wedding party into the Gala room for the reception. Instead, I found myself sitting in the front pew, staring up at the simple altar. I’d never been an overly religious sort, but the quiet and the stained glass gave me a much needed moment of solace.

If it had been my wedding day, I’m sure it would have been in one of the large churches in Manhattan. The Clay Winslow and Helena Danbury wedding of my mother’s dreams would have been three hundred people minimum. It would have made the headlines of every newspaper and wedding journal my mother could have procured.

And it would have been all wrong.

The tear that dropped onto the pink tulip surprised me.

I knew it wasn’t for Clay.

Not really.

It wasn’t even for the idea of us. That had died a fiery death just before Christmas. In all honesty, it had died long before then. I’d just held onto the safety of him and our fake relationship because it had been easier than facing the reality of how hollow and static my life had become.

Clay had just realized it before me.

Because he met his person.

Rachel Doyle had shaken him up and the way he looked at her made me realize just how unfathomable we actually were as a couple. I was a placeholder in his old life. A bookmark in a forgotten novel that had been left on a table in a pretty sitting room that was only used a few times a year.

That was the chalky pill I couldn’t swallow.

I’d allowed myself to become that woman.

I reached down to pick up one of the fragile apple blossoms and slipped it in my pocket. I’d tuck this one into my journal to remind me of a fresh start. That the blossoms belonged to someone else, and I needed to remember it was never meant for me.

Part of that fresh start meant facing the wedding reception.

As well as finding my “date”. There was a strong emphasis on those quotes.

I was pretty sure Reid Pierce was going in my mistake column as well. He’d been exciting and mysterious at first. No one really knew what was going on behind those glacial gray eyes. Surely, I would be the exception.

And here I was alone again.

The exception, evidently, was wanting me. I wasn’t sure Reid even stayed for the entire ceremony. He certainly didn’t wait around to keep me company or lead me into the Gala room as a gentleman would. Then again a fog had settled around me during the vows.

My world had been conditioned for marriage.

Helena Danbury was good marriage stock. As if I was a side character inBridgertonor something. Never the main character, that was for sure.

Did I even want that anymore? Maybe that was the bigger question.

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