Page 4 of A Dream of Stars and Curses

Well, call me Estelle and slap me sideways, I’ve always done that. Who knew I was such a natural? It’s not the exciting crystal ball shopping trip I pictured, but it’s free and she’s right—I can start right now. No complaints from me.

‘I didn’t know it was so easy.’

Our dogs chase one another across the large meadow, jumping around like they’re puppies again. I notice the fairy mothers look at our dogs and exchange a look with a secretive smile. The last time I met them, they mentioned that they were thinking about getting their kids their first puppy next year. I’m glad my dog helped sway them towards it.

‘It’s easy to hide, too,’ Kate says. ‘Not every young witch is lucky enough to have accepting parents. Gazing at clouds can easily pass as simple boredom or daydreaming.’

‘So what do I do?’

‘Take this cloud, for instance.’ Kate points at a large fluffy cloud ahead. ‘What do you see?’

‘Erm...’ I don’t really see any shapes, but I don’t want to tell her that. It’s all just a smooth mass of white to me.

‘Take your time,’ Kate says. ‘The beauty of cloud scrying is that you can practice every day without any tools or much effort. Let your gaze soften and your mind ease.’

I do like the sound of without much effort.

Kate whistles once, and our dogs come bounding back to us. ‘Make sure you clear your mind before you try. If you look up when you’re in a negative or fearful mindset, you’re more likely to see those thoughts mirrored. You get the clearest answers when you have no expectations. Always remember that there is a fine line between allowing your unconscious to speak to you and wishful thinking—don’t confuse the two. It’s the same for tarot and all other forms of divination.’

So if I look up and see Leverett kissing me, it probably won’t mean anything. Not that clouds could be that specific anyway. Or maybe they could? As Kate said, I can practice easily enough. I guess I’ll see.

‘Maybe I should learn tarot, too,’ I say. ‘I mean, if there are similarities, would it make sense to pick up both?’

Kate thinks for a moment. ‘I don’t see why not.’ She smiles at me. ‘I know you’re serious, so if you show me the deck you’d like, I’ll buy it for you.’

I smile, too. Kate is like my witch mum. ‘It’s true, then, that my first deck needs to be a gift?’

Kate dismisses it with a flick of her hand. ‘More misconceptions. Some witches like the idea of being chosen, that someone gifting them a deck out of the blue is a sign, but it’s really not necessary. I find it’s a much stronger sign when you see a deck and feel an instant pull to it. If it calls to you, there’s no harm in buying your own. You also have the certainty that you like the deck. It’s never pleasant to receive a present you simply don’t like, especially when it was so well-meant.’

I guess my earlier vision of going crystal ball shopping with Kate wasn’t far off after all, only we’ll be looking for cards instead.

‘Where do we go to buy cards?’

Eastport doesn’t have any metaphysical shops that I’m aware of. Kate would know the area much better in that regard, though. It’s not like I know every little corner and narrow side alley in this city—I only know what a quick internet search told me.

Kate gives me a prodding smile. ‘If you find one you like online, I’m sure Leverett wouldn’t mind ordering it for you.’

I blush. Does she know how I feel about him? She couldn’t. I haven’t been that obvious. Have I?

Kate laughs. ‘Don’t worry, I simply have a feel for such things.’

Apparently I’m being very obvious. I doubt that’s the full truth, but I appreciate that she doesn’t spell it out. If she can pretend that Leverett has no idea, so can I.

‘I’ve been wanting to ask him for ideas of how to help them... you know. I just haven’t been back yet.’

I bite my lip and look around at nothing in particular. I hate how tongue-tied I feel. He isn’t even here.

‘I went to his shop two days ago,’ Kate says. ‘He asked about you.’

My heart skips a beat. ‘He’s wondering how I’m doing?’

Of course he is—that doesn’t make it a personal concern. It’s natural to wonder how I’m adjusting. It doesn’t mean anything.

‘He is,’ Kate says. ‘I told him you’re doing well, but I’m sure he’d appreciate you coming by and telling him yourself.’

I suppose if I’m ordering a tarot deck through him, I’ll have a good excuse to go. I’ll be looking up decks as soon as I’m home.

I do feel bad that I haven’t been back, but I didn’t know how to face him. I feel like I’ve made the biggest idiot of myself, and I know I’ll do no better next time I’m around him. Being near him makes it hard to think. The Dreamcatcher was a real threat to my mental health, but it’s Leverett who’ll take my sanity.

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