Page 18 of The Awakened Wolf

Through a door at the end of the room, I saw a few chipped animal statuettes that past pups had used as a jungle gym, like those play areas you see in 90s era malls. It was empty, as none of my shifters had children with them.

But do some of them have children at home?

“My Gods, Kiana. Couldn’t you have found someplace less refugee-camp-y for them?” This was a whisper because I didn’t want to insult our guests.

“They’re safe. They’re clean and fed and housed. And they aren’t mixing with the rest of the pack. What else would you have me do?” This was not said in a whisper because Kiana gave zero fluffs what anyone thought of her decisions.

Across the room, a head popped up at the sound of her voice. I met the blue eyes of Evan, who hadn’t abandoned my spawn, where he was engrossed in a game of poker with some of the Guard. I spotted the red-headed twins, Archer and Atlas. Though I’d grown up with them and knew Atlas was a sweetheart, I’d take a hard pass on talking to the other wolves at the table.

Archer, Seth, Raj, Tyler, and Luis were just a sampling of the males that Kiana had rightly guessed I wouldn’t have wanted as potential mates. They seemed to aspire to what Charlie called toxic masculinity, always amped for a fight and urging each other on. Like now, when in the ten seconds I’d been present, I’d already heard them bragging about their conquests in today’s battle. Evan must be dead sick of playing, ‘Who’s the bro-est of us all?’

I started to head their way, but Kiana grabbed my arm. “No way. You can’t get within another ten feet of those males. Not the way you’re smelling.”

I opened my mouth.

“And no speaking,” she added, her gaze going from cloudy to full cumulonimbus. “You’re not in charge.”

I closed it again as she called Evan over to us. He rose to a soundtrack of whistles and catcalls from his fellow card players, as if he’d been called before the sexy principal. I rolled my eyes so hard it hurt. If I wasn’t allowed to communicate with my voice, at least I could throw some anti-bro energy into the universe. But everything stuttered to a stop as Evan approached. He was looking…

Rough wasn’t the right word. Different was all I could pinpoint. His hair was unkempt, and his chin dusted with an uncharacteristic five o’clock shadow. But of course, he had to be exhausted. None of us had gotten any rest since the battle, and he’d been in hard-core babysitter and re-education mode with the new shifters. Still, the saunter he adopted on his way toward us was odd. His normal walk was entirely unremarkable. It had no shoulder-shifting bravado like what was happening now.

When he reached us, this bizarre incarnation of Evan grew weirder, giving me a casual, “What’s up?” and chin jerk instead of our usual bear hug. My arms fairly ached at the lack of that hug. I could have used it, given my new status as a universally detested fallen female. At the same time, his voice almost made me laugh. He’d ratcheted it so flat and deep he sounded like Darth Vader.

“Evan,” I thought his way, concerned. “Are you okay?”

His head swung to me, and he looked down the bridge of his nose alarmingly like Max had done when he’d accused me of… sleeping with Evan.

“Why wouldn’t I be okay, Elyse?” he said. “Think I can’t hold my own with the guys?”

“What are you talking about?” My head whirled with confusion. Maybe that thump to my skull earlier had some kind of lasting effect that popped up at random?

“Stop that,” Kiana said, looking pointedly at both of us. “I know what you’re doing, and it’s weird and wrong. Only Alphas and Betas should… Anyway, Elyse, tell him why we’re here. Out loud, please.”

It was Evan’s turn to roll his eyes.

“Uh, yeah, okay.” I’d been so distracted by the condition of the room and worries for my shifters that the point of our conversation had almost slipped my mind. Now that we were about to discuss it, my mouth seized up. “Evan, it’s come to our attention that Kiana may also have a gift. The opposite of mine, in fact. We believe her bite can eradicate the wolf form of a shifter, leaving the human behind. But we need a volunteer to help us confirm it, and I thought—”

“What?” He laughed derisively. “You thought I’d volunteer? That I’d offer myself up for your sister to maul so, what? You can kill my wolf?”

“No!” I said, annoyed to feel the prick of tears. “That’s not what I meant at all. I just thought you’d want to… be free to be yourself again. I thought you’d be happy.” This devolved into a whine, and I pictured my wolf nudging his with her muzzle. What was happening here? What had I done wrong?

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he snapped. “Be myself again?”

“I mean, it’s not your fault. I dragged you into this world with all of its rules, and… it’s so old-fashioned. And I just…” I was stammering, searching for the words that would fix this, that would explain my good intentions. “I just don’t want you to have to live like you’re back in Georgia again.”

“I don’t know why you think you know me so well, Elyse, but I’m not the sassy gay friend starring in your movie. There are many sides to me. And if it makes you uncomfortable to see those other sides, that’s a you problem, not a me problem.”

I flinched. “I’m sorry, Evan. I don’t understand.” I switched back to our internal dialogue on instinct. I needed my friend to feel my apology in his bones. For whatever I’d done. My nose burned as I fought the tears. I would not cry in front of the new shifters. And I especially wasn’t going to cry in front of Raj. Or Tyler. I’d rather have my entire wolf waxed one inch at a time. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I wanted you to be able to go back to your old life.”

“What life? A failed dream? A cubicle and TPS reports in triplicate? Marketing myself like I’m a piece of meat on every new app? Never being just the right amount of manly to make anyone happy? Wondering when someone else is going to try to bash in my head with a baseball bat? I’ve spent my whole life being treated like I was the predator when I was always the prey. Now I am the monster. With the strength and courage to…” He stopped, tears gleaming in his eyes. “I kept you safe today, Elyse.” He said aloud. “And you can’t take that away from me.”

“You’ve always been my hero.” I sniffled. “No one can take that away from you.”

I reached for him, and this time, he folded me into his arms. I pressed my wet face into the solid warmth of his chest, and he nuzzled his cheek against my hair. Affection like this was strictly forbidden, but I didn’t care. He was mine. There was a part of him I’d accidentally created and then tried to erase… Just like his real mother.

“Why are you here?” Evan asked. “Did you find Sebastian?”

I shook my head. “He left me. So Max kicked me out.”

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