Page 186 of Rain of Shadows and Endings

She didn’t need him. He didn’t know what she needed. This was just another way he was binding her to him. Strengthening this fucking bond.

Stupid.

Impulsive.

Reckless.

But as she stepped under the hot spray of the shower, watching pink-tinged water flow down the drain, all she could think was that it had been worth it.

It had been worth it to not be able to think about anything else while Theon had brought her to ruin. She didn’t care what that said about her. Drowning in rapture kept her from shattering, and she wasn’t about to apologize for how she held the pieces of her soul together.

* * *

“Let’s go, baby doll.”

Tessa groaned as curtains were thrown wide. She pulled the blankets over her head, curling tightly into herself.

This day could already go fuck itself.

She hadn’t stayed in the shower long last night. The moment her thoughts and memories had started to surface again, she’d only wanted to sleep. Not because she was exhausted or tired. She definitely should have been after the events of the day. But when it came down to it, she just didn’t want to be awake.

She didn’t want to be awake now either.

It was coming. The dark was coming at any moment, and she couldn’t decide if she even cared.

She’d expected to face Theon’s wrath when she got done cleaning up last night, but when she’d exited the bathroom, it hadn’t been Theon waiting for her. It had been Axel. Theon had apparently needed to go with Luka to “take care of some things” leaving Axel to watch over her. Tessa had been both relieved and disappointed. Relieved because it had delayed facing Theon and whatever consequences were surely coming for her, but disappointed because she’d needed the bond.

The bond. Not him.

She’d wanted to ask where exactly Theon had gone, but she hadn’t. And Axel hadn’t provided any more information either. He’d only settled onto the sofa with his computer and a drink, looking so much like his brother it was almost comforting.

Almost.

“Tessa. Let’s go. I want to get a run in before I have to drop you off with Luka,” Axel said again, tugging on the blankets.

A run with Axel?

She threw the blankets off, pushing her hair out of her face as she sat up. Looking at the other side of the bed, she could tell Theon hadn’t slept here. Had he even come back?

“Where is Theon?” she called to Axel, who had disappeared into the dressing room.

“Out,” he called back.

“Still?” She was climbing out of the bed when Axel reappeared, running gear and sneakers in his arms.

“Yes, still,” he answered, holding out the items. “Go change. We leave in five minutes. Eat this too,” he added, swiping a banana off the coffee table and piling it atop the clothing.

“But—”

“Go, Tessa. I have shit to do today.”

“You’re in a good mood,” Tessa griped, snatching the clothing from him.

“Don’t start with this, Tessa,” Axel sighed. “We’ve been up all night doing damage control, and Theon had to—”

Her eyes narrowed when he abruptly stopped speaking. “Had to what?”

“Nothing. Just change. You don’t want to be late for training with Luka. He’ll be an ass.”

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