Page 53 of House of Gilded Nightmares

He takes a step closer, despite my warning. Reaching a hand out, he strokes the side of my cheek with one finger.

“We are bonded,” I whisper. “Which is why what you did is such a betrayal. How could you keep this from me? How can I ever trust you again?”

His hand falls back to his side. “I kept hoping that I could change the way I felt, the intensity building between us. Hoping up until that moment in the meadow. That you would be wed and the feelings would pass, that my oath would remain intact. There was no need to tell you if you meant nothing to me, and I kept trying to tell myself that you didn’t. Not in that way.”

Furious tears spike the corners of my eyes. “You would let me marry a complete stranger, someone you know I do not want to marry, when you carry within your veins the blood that could, along with mine, save Valaron?”

Zyren shakes his head, jaw rolling. “I told you, I do not lay claim to that blood…”

“Claim it or not, it is yours, Zyren.” I cross my arms over my chest. “You are clearly older. You would be king, would you not?”

“I gave up my crown!” Zyren growls. “I gave it up because I wasn’t worthy. And I will not betray another brother, not for anyone or anything, not even you, Sarielle. You are the center of my world, but I still cannot.”

I go still, my lungs emptying of air. “This is because of your other brother. You gave up your title because you think you’re to blame for his death.”

“I am to blame.” The pain in Zyren’s eyes makes my chest tighten. “The nightmare that killed him…it was drawn to me. To the darkness within me. I should not—cannot—be king the way I am. Not the king Valaron deserves.”

“Zyren…” I moan with all the heartbrokenness I feel. “You are a good and honorable man. I wish you could see that.”

“Good? Honorable?” He lets out a mirthless laugh. “I have given in to my most basic urges with my brother’s betrothed. I am a villain. Whatever version of me you hold in your heart, whatever hope for a future between us, you must put it aside.”

His words ring between us. He hadn’t answered me when I’d asked about our future in the meadow. But now I have my answer, the stark, harsh truth of it.

I blink back tears of fury and sorrow. “So, that’s it then? We forget what happened and abandon all hope of a future together?”

“It must be that way. Surely you can see that, Sarielle.”

His words are a low rumble that vibrates my heart. It feels like my soul is fracturing into dozens of tiny pieces.

“I see a great many things,” I whisper.

We stare at each other for several achingly long moments, and I know this is the last time we will speak together in this way, look upon each other in this way. After this, everything changes yet again. An icy numbness encircles my heart and spreads through my veins until I feel almost nothing at all.

“I need to get my rest now,” I say coldly, emotionlessly. “For the wedding tomorrow.”

“I’ll be right outside your door,” Zyren responds.

Then he turns and stalks away, opening and closing the door behind him. And I am alone.

Chapter Twenty-One

I sink down along the stone arch of the window until I’m sitting at the base of it. Back against the wall, I stare out at the valley below as the hours pass. Even the cold wind blowing down from the mountain does not move me from that spot.

Hanging in the night sky beyond, directly in my line of sight, both moons stare back at me. One luminous and pale silver, the other a perfectly round disc of inky blackness. What had I done to deserve such a fate? First, to nearly be joined with the High Priest, and now this. This…which is so much worse.

At least with the High Priest, my heart was completely removed from the situation. It could have been that way in Valaron—I chose to fulfill my duty and marry the king to save the realms. But now, to feel what I feel for Zyren? It’s too cruel.

Especially knowing he doesn’t feel the same way about me.

He couldn’t possibly. If he did, there’s no way he could walk away from me. He would marry me, and we would save Valaron together. He wouldn’t even have to rule if he didn’t want to—our bloodlines together would satisfy the spell and stop the nightmares from escaping this place.

The king would still be angry with us, no doubt. But no less angry than he’ll be if he finds out what we did in the meadow. Zyren said it himself—he couldn’t have made another choice if he tried. What kind of future does that leave us? Every moment of every day, living with this terrible longing burning inside our cores?

In a way, Zyren’s betrayal makes it easier. Because now my anger is far stronger than anything I felt before. It doesn’t erase those feelings, but it makes them more tolerable. Whatever trust I placed in Zyren was clearly a mistake. He couldn’t even share the most basic of truths with me, so what kind of future could we have had, even if he did choose me?

My thoughts are still whirling when the horizon lightens to pewter, and then a lavender edge of dawn becomes visible. The ice that encased my heart has grown even thicker, colder, more impenetrable. Today, I will save Valaron and Aureon both. That is all that matters.

A knock on the door disturbs my thoughts. A moment later, a woman enters. She looks perhaps twice my age, with dark hair swept into a bun and dark eyes to match. When her eyes land on me sitting in the window, they narrow slightly and her mouth purses. She sweeps across the room in a bustle of skirts and gestures for me to rise.

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