Page 77 of Crimson Desires

“Either way, the financials aren’t for you to worry about,” Dad said.

“I’m not worried.”

“Oh, good-,”

“Because I’m going to take care of it,” I finished. “Listen, Dad. I just sold a merch design to Wicked Crimson’s tour manager. I’m going to get a lot of money upfront for it. Hopefully enough to cover the majority of your surgery bills.”

“Wait, you designed it?”

Suddenly feeling sheepish, I let go of an awkward laugh. “I mean, yeah. It’s not that special, but-,”

“Nonsense, Aster! That’s amazing! You know, I always said that you should have stayed in art school.”

“You know why I couldn’t, Dad.” My voice wasn’t accusatory. Just matter of fact.

There was a moment of silence between us. I almost thought that the line had gotten randomly disconnected. But then I heard Dad sigh.

“Honey, I wanted to talk to you about something. Look, I’m not exactly wishing for the end, but if I pass—you’re going to receive a hell of a lot of life insurance money. Enough to start fresh.”

“Dad, no.”

“Christ, Aster. Can’t you listen to your old man for once?” Dad snapped. Dad rarely raised his voice at me—so whenever he did, I knew to shut up. “I know that you’ve been doing your best for the past five years to take care of me. And I appreciate the sacrifices that you’ve made for me more than you could ever know. But it kills me having to live every day knowing that I’m the reason you had to put your life on pause.”

“It’s not like that, Dad.”

“It’s exactly like that. As I said, I’m not trying to die. But I just... I just want you to be able to focus on yourself for once. Fathers are supposed to take care of their daughters. Not the other way around. And if the best way for me to take care of you is to get out of your way, then...”

“Dad, I’m not having this conversation with you,” I said. “My life wouldn’t be any better without you in it. You’re all I’ve got. I can’t lose you. So, whatever you’re thinking—forget it. As soon as this tour ends, I’m coming home. And I’m going to pay for your surgery. And that’s final. Okay?”

Dad relented. “Aster, you’re going to hate me for saying this, but you remind me so much of your mother sometimes.”

Dad and I exchanged a quick round of “I love you”s and “goodbye”s. Then, I hung up.

My stomach twisted. Burning tears pricked the corners of my eyes. To force them down, I clenched my jaw tight enough to crack my teeth.

Dad was right: I did hate him for saying that.

***

My body hummed with excitement as I waited for the show to begin.

Standing with the venue’s security team, I was as close to the stage as I could be without literally standing on it. Behind me was a metal gate intended to keep concertgoers at a safe distance from the stage.

I’d seen Wicked Crimson perform once before in Raleigh—but I’d been almost a quarter of a mile away from the action. Plus, technically, I had been working. So, even though I’d had the pleasure of enjoying the concert, I hadn’t gotten to experience it from a fan perspective.

But now, I had the best seat in the house.

Maybe Jack Maverick will reach down and touch my hands, I thought, giggling at the absurdity of wanting such a chaste interaction with the rock star when I had been tangled up in his bedsheets less than forty-eight hours previous.

Thanks to Ava, I wasn’t even worried about running into Violet anymore. The Credit One Stadium boasted about ten-thousand seats. Now that I wasn’t working the merch booth, the chances of me bumping into my sister were zero to none.

Lacking any pomp and circumstance, Wicked Crimson’s opener took the stage.

As unconventional as it was, Wicked Crimson had hired several different opening bands to perform with them on their tour. Each opening band would follow Wicked Crimson for a venue or two. Then, they’d leave, and another opener would fill their place.

Tonight’s opener was an all-female alternative rock group called Rouge Rebel.

Rouge Rebel’s music was fast and punky, with a lot of distortion and screaming. Not exactly my cup of tea as far as music went, but the group’s energy was so infectious that I couldn’t help but headbang along to their songs.

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