Page 90 of You're so Bad

My leg and arm were broken. He’d wanted to prove he was still stronger, and back then, he had been. For a couple of months, I was too fucked up to do anything for him. It had happened during summer vacation, and he had a buddy who’d set my bones, so no one asked any questions.

I spent the next two years working out every chance I got. Getting into scraps so I learned how to fight better. Getting ready to take him on.

But in the end, I didn’t have to. He got himself caught by the cops, and the stupid fucker told them I was his cover. I saw my opportunity, and I took it. I went in and told them everything.

My mother threw me out of the house for being a snitch, but I was sixteen, old enough to take care of myself.

Or so I thought.

My mind turns to Reese.

He’s okay. He’s got to be okay.

“I get it,” he says. “Were you…is there a chance he has friends who’d come after you for turning him in?”

“I don’t think so. He’d burned all his bridges by then. I didn’t like thinking about it, though, or about my mom knowing where to find me. Still don’t, but I imagine she’s too strung out to do anything about it.”

“And this is why you kept running after you left. Changed your name a few more times?”

I scratched my head and looked away. “I guess I was always chasing that fresh start—the way I felt when I got here and met all of you. But I never found it.” Then I grin at him. “Besides, I won’t lie. I got myself into trouble a time or two.”

“Wouldn’t be Leonard if you didn’t,” he says, “but that’s one of the things we love about you, man.”

I lift my eyebrows, trying to act cool. “Delia’s really getting to you, huh?”

“Yes, thank God.” He pins me with an intense look. “She’s the best thing that ever happened to me. Maybe you should be more open to new things.”

The panicky feeling crawls back. He’s talking about Shauna. I know he is. Still, I say, “Like that therapy b.s.?”

“Not b.s. If you find the right person, it could really help. When you’re ready, I’m going to help you.”

Just like Burke to saywhen I’m ready, as if it’s going to happen and isn’t just something he’d like to happen. He believes in me. He has no reason to, but he does.

“But I was talking about Shauna,” he says, just when I figured I was safe. “There’s no way you nearly crashed a Rolls Royce because you were that excited about posing as a pediatric surgeon in front of a bunch of assholes.”

“Think about it. I’m a former con artist who’s trying to behave. It felt like someone had just handed me a present.”

“Sure,” he says with a half-smile. “But don’t con me, Leonard. I know you wouldn’t have been half as into the idea if it weren’t for her.”

“Sure,” I admit. “I like her.” He’s still waiting, so I add, “A lot. Which is why I know she deserves someone who’s going to treat her right.”

“Why can’t you treat her right?”

I prop my elbows on my knees and put my head in my hands. “I don’t know how.”

“Is that true, man, or is that just something you’ve been telling yourself so long you don’t know the difference? Because from where I’m sitting, you know how to be good to people. You’re going to help me dress up like Prince Eric for fuck’s sake. That’s some favor.”

“Again.” I look up at him. “It’s something I’m going to take great enjoyment in doing.”

He angles his head, studying me. “And you don’t take enjoyment from being good to her?”

I pause, caught off guard. “Of course I do. But I’m going to make mistakes and screw everything up. That’s a given. She’ll be better off if I leave her alone.”

A little late for that, but surely late is better than never.

“Why’s it a given that you making mistakes is going to screw everything up? We all make mistakes.”

He’s right and he’s wrong. Because there’s something inside of me that feeds off bad decisions, that wants to turn left because everyone else is going right. Sometimes it sleeps, but when it wakes up it’s a real bitch. It’s hard to believe that I could have this life, that I could live here and run L&L Restoration with him and have a girlfriend who doesn’t want to kill me after a week. It’s not something I can wrap my head around.

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