Page 60 of A City of Flames

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I consider my inability to sleep as part of my routine now. And realizing the extent of what Darius has requested me to do... it rocked a part of my mind so completely that the only solution was to go to the stables within the castle walls and pet the horses.

Clad in a white nightgown and cloak, I run the bristle brush along the mane of a white mare. “If only I had your job,” I whisper, tilting my head as the horse gently nudges my shoulder. “At least you wouldn’t need to worry about collecting a vial of dragon blood.” Or stealing the pendant, or my brothers finding out, or the trials.

“Nara,” a surprised voice and one I can recognize in a heartbeat makes me look to the right as Lorcan walks in, pulling on the reins of his horse. “I didn’t expect to see you at the stables.”

Ignoring the motion in my chest as he nears me, I face the mare and mutter, “Where did you expect to see me?”

“Out in the gardens, trapping worms.”

I might not be looking at him, but I can hear the humor in his voice, picture the smile on his face that he does around me.

“Frogs,” I correct him with an exasperating sigh. “I’d be trapping frogs.”

“As a previous trapper, I thought you’d trap anything.”

Huffing, I retrieve the brush and turn, my heart-stopping at the cedar scent of him. Clearing my throat for a bit of tranquility within myself, I say, “A worm only needs water for it to resurface. A rabbit needs fresh vegetables. Deer are attracted to salt and apples, and a frog ironically love worms and seek damp areas.” I lift a brow as he nods with a stare I’d pass as impressed. “I’ve captured almost every living thing in my life, but as a trapper, animals weren’t a priority compared to creatures.”

He stays quiet. I don’t think he knows what to say to that. Perhaps the certain coldness in my voice added to the lack of a reply. He might have offered to help my brothers, for my happiness, and maybe it’s all my frustration coming in at once that I open my mouth without thinking. “Do you regret what happened the other night?”

His brows furrow, jerking his head back slightly in shock. But I can see it... I can see that he knew that topic would come up. “The general just doesn’t want me distracting—”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

He sighs, a deep and tired one, running his hand over his face. “No, I do not regret one second of what happened, Nara.”

A yank in my heart makes me feel like it’s trying to get out just from that answer. He doesn’t regret it, but did I? He’s the first I’ve ever kissed; I hate to think I might well and truly be scared.

My breath then locks in my chest as he breaks the distance between us. Staring down at me and in a low voice, he adds, “And I haven’t stopped thinking about wanting to do it again.”

Then why did you not defend me in front of the general, I want to voice but can’t seem to.

Despite how much I want to become a venator and follow my father’s steps, I’m already failing before the trial. Lying, working with a shifter to steal from the queen. I can’t even bring myself to tell Lorcan that, not like I almost did the other night.

Lorcan’s gaze on me flitters to the side, taking slow breaths like he wants to resist, and at that moment, I realize I don’t know enough about him, maybe to most I do. But even I’ve noticed that there are times he’ll avoid me or hold back.

My teeth sink into my bottom lip as I shake my head. “I should go,” I whisper, dropping the brush into a bucket and moving past.

But footsteps against the wooden floorboards come from behind, and it takes a second before I’m whirled around to face him again. He’s gripping onto my elbow, eyes bright as the torch lights from the walls illuminate that green flame in them.

“Do you regret it?” He inches closer, but there’s something in his voice, brewing like the question is both painful and hopeful at once. The desperation within his words sears my heart.

“No,” I breathe, still not knowing if I do. At that, his sigh of relief is followed by a crashing of his mouth on mine.

Unlike our first kiss, I’m not shocked into it as he cranes his neck, giving him more access to my lips, for his tongue to slip in and claim each second, they intertwine. My heart thrums, sending me into something I’m not in control of as I bring my hands out to the leather material of his chest and slide them up around his neck.

He’s soft and tender enough, like he’s guiding me. His forehead presses against mine and my breathing levels down to a heartbeat as he breaks away, saying, “Come with me for a meal at the castle tomorrow—” His voice hoarse “—with the queen.”

I raise my brows, surprised by the invitation that seems to have come out of nowhere, nonetheless intrigued. “The queen?”

He nods. “She thinks of you as highly skilled for a trainee.”

If she saw how unskilled I really am against Darius, then—

I blink at the sudden thought of myself agreeing that I’m unskilled when it comes to him. Idiotic dragon, ruining everything. Shaking my head with a pensive frown, I ask, “Won’t the general dislike the thought of you inviting me to a meal?”

“The general dislikes a lot of things.”

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