Page 59 of Hawke

“What the fuck did you do?” I asked, my tone lethally calm. It was one thing for the buyers to rob me of a future when I’d been drugged and bound, but another for this asshole to do the same, only to Charlotte. “Answer me!”

“I-I’m a police officer. My badge is in my pocket,” the man answered. “I heard a scream, saw a man running, and when I got here, she was on the ground passed out.”

I hadn’t seen anyone running, so I kept him pressed to the wall. “Keep talking.”

“I’m with the Denver PD. Ayden Santiago is my partner.”

At the mention of the detective, I remembered back to the night of the break-in. There were a number of officers crawling all over Syn. I looked closely at the man, and I did remember seeing him there that night. I let him go before rushing back over to Charlotte.

“Call nine-one-one,” I ordered the officer as I knelt back down with my sub. Her body was so limp, but there was a trace of a pulse. I held her hand, brushing my thumb over her wrist, hoping to infuse enough warmth to wake her up as the detective used his pocket knife to free the plastic from her neck.

The officer then stepped aside, calling someone else I assumed was the police by the conversation he was having with whoever was on the line. I didn’t care about that. The only one I cared about, and had ever cared about, was dying in my arms.

“No, little sub. This isn’t the way it’s supposed to be,” I told Charlotte, practically rocking her in my arms. “You stay with me, goddammit.”

“Ayden and the EMTs are on their way,” the detective interrupted before he started to look around. “I’m going to start securing the scene.”

I gave a nod before raising Charlotte’s lifeless body up. “You can’t leave me, little sub. Just hold on a little while longer.”

The wails of sirens could be heard in the distance, screaming as they got closer. Within a few minutes, the paramedics were loading her onto an ambulance. I attempted to follow them onto it until one of the EMTs put his hand out to stop me from advancing any further.

“You can’t ride with her.”

I growled and was going to argue, but the police officers were watching me carefully. I didn’t want to delay her getting much needed care, so I would control my temper for now, even though it was taking a Herculean effort on my part to do so.

“I need to tell her something, then you can go.” The EMT stepped back as I hurried over to her. I cupped her face in my hand and kissed her cheek. “I love you, little sub. You were right. Now wake the hell up and give me one of your ‘I told you so’s.’”

I was about to say something more when the gurney was pulled away from me. Charlotte was then loaded onto the ambulance and the last thing I heard before it raced off into the night were the words ‘Saint Joseph’s Hospital.’

38 – HAWKE

After the ambulance left, I had tried to leave too but got detained for questioning by Ayden Santiago. I told him all I knew, which was a hell of a lot less than what Austin Whiteside knew. Eventually, I was released and allowed to go back to my hotel where I got my car and took off for the hospital. I’d probably never driven faster than I did on the drive there.

Once at the hospital, I lied to get information on her whereabouts. I had to see her… to tell her I would make everything okay.

Would she even listen to me?

That damned inner voice of mine actually made sense this time. I had broken her heart and with my cruel words, might’ve done more than just push her out of my life. I might have led her straight into the arms of a madman who might’ve just extinguished that beautiful light of hers forever, one I’d been so afraid I’d destroy myself.

I reached the floor where she was getting care and noticed a familiar sight in the waiting room. It was the man I had seen her with at the restaurant, the one she’d told me was her older brother. It was safe to assume the other two blond males were her other siblings. Joining them were her parents, their pictures recognized from the file I’d had drawn up on her. I didn’t want to intrude, so I made sure to stay out of sight.

A doctor rushed past me, and joined the group waiting. Hoping it was an update on her condition, I moved a little closer, too. I’d heard the six of them talking, the physician throwing around terms like“concussion,” “stable,”and“observation.”A profound sense of relief filled me. I wasn’t sure whether she could have visitors and it was the first thing one of her brothers had asked. They were advised to wait but I wouldn’t and couldn’t.

I slowly eased away from the doorframe, and followed the numbers down until I reached the room the doctor had just referenced. I peeked inside and when I didn’t see anyone lingering about, I slipped into the room. Charlotte was lying there, a jumble of wires protruding out from beneath her hospital gown. Her head was swollen and bruised, the dark purple coloring enough to make me ball up my fists. I stepped closer, seeing the large red mark that circled her neck.

“I’m going to find out who did this to you, little sub,” I vowed as I stood beside her bed.

I knew I wasn’t supposed to be in there, but I had to check on her condition myself. I didn’t want to impede her medical care, so I forced myself to resist the urge to touch her. She looked so broken, her fragility even more apparent now to me than ever before. While I wasn’t the one to attack her, my sending her out into the cold, dark night had led to it, so I was partially, if not almost as responsible for what had happened to her as the sicko who did this.

“I was so afraid my love would break you, and it did, just not in the way I’d imagined it would.” I continued to look between her and the machines. I didn’t know what most of them were for, or what purposed they served. “I foolishly thought by rejecting your innocence and pushing you away, I’d save your spirit from getting crushed. I didn’t think about your body.”

My own eyes watered as I imagined the horror she’d suffered. I found myself wracked with guilt, the knowledge that I could’ve prevented this from happening to her eating away at me. Charlotte was lying in that bed because of me. As the Dominant inside me roared to life, I was left with even more regret because now, I realized I’d failed her as both.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, little sub.”

And I was, maybe even more so than she would ever know. My hands ached to touch her, but I knew I couldn’t. I never should’ve because if I hadn’t, none of this would’ve ever happened. I didn’t know whether she blamed me or not, but it didn’t matter. I knew the fault laid with me, and the weight of that guilt was nearly crushing me beneath it.

Finally, I committed her current state to memory. As I made whoever did this pay, they would look a hundred times worse than her when I was finished with them. Rage was the only thing fueling me at this point, so I turned and walked to the door.

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