Page 12 of Riding the Waves

“We were together when they were born,” Amy said, not sure why she was confiding in a virtual stranger, but feeling the urge to talk. “I’d decided it would be good to live near my parents so we had some support.” She tried not to dwell on how unhelpful her parents had turned out to be. “So Damian moved to Oxford with me a couple of months before my due date. He got a job at the local supermarket, which he hated and didn’t pay well. We lived in a horrible bedsit and could barely even afford that.” She pressed her lips together. “Everything was stressful … and then we had two babies who constantly demanded attention. We were both sleep deprived and stressed.”

“It’s such a difficult time when they’re babies,” Lizzie said. “I suppose the advantage of having kids later in life was that Max and I had both had good careers. We were financially sound, but it was still incredibly hard. I can’t imagine having money worries on top of everything else.”

Amy took a sip of her tea before continuing. “Damian and I were both approaching breaking point. All we seemed to do was argue. Then he said he wanted to go back to Hope Cove for the summer. He could work during tourist season and make good money. I said no. I didn’t want to up and move with two babies. Plus, the price of renting anywhere around here was astronomical.

“Damian still had his van here and all his surf equipment for rentals. He said he’d live in the van for the summer, that way he could send me all the money he earned.” She grimaced. “I know it was killing him that we were struggling financially. He wanted to provide for us. In the end, I told him that if he left then we were over.” She paused again, watching a sparrow hop along the edge of the patio. “I think Damian took it as an idle threat. He came back here. I was furious, partly because he’d left me alone with the boys and partly because he got to spend the summer surfing and doing what he loved.”

“That’s when you met someone else?” Lizzie asked.

She nodded. “I’d actually known Anthony since secondary school. We dated for a while when we were teenagers. I bumped into him when I was out walking the boys in their buggy and we got chatting. He was a couple of years older than me and had already established his career. He’d just bought a gorgeous house and he seemed so together.” She shook her head, hearing how she sounded.

“Apparently, he’d been carrying a torch for me since we’d dated. He started coming over now and then and did a few jobs around the flat. He’d help me with the kids in the evenings. Everything felt a little more manageable with him around. Pretty quickly he asked me to marry him. He said he’d raise the kids as his own … it felt as though he’d thrown me a life raft when I was drowning.” She puffed out a humourless laugh. “You must think I’m awful.”

“No,” Lizzie said. “I think you were young and stressed and did what you thought was best at the time.”

“I did love Anthony, in a way. He was a nice guy, and fun and dependable. That’s what I needed – someone dependable.” She took another sip of her tea. “I look back and can’t believe I did that to Damian. As far as he was concerned, we were still together, and then one evening when he called I told him I was marrying another guy. And from then on that guy was living with his kids and he was raising them instead of Damian.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “I can’t even imagine how much he must have hated me.”

“How have things been with you and Damian since?”

Amy bobbed her head and curled her lip. “For the first couple of years it was hard. There were a lot of angry phone calls, and the odd time when Damian turned up on the doorstep, which never went down well with Anthony. But after a while we settled into our own lives and everything felt pretty amicable and easy. I don’t think Damian would ever have been happy living away from the beach. It’s in his blood. I also don’t think I’d ever have been happy with his haphazard lifestyle. He’s one of those people who assumes everything will work out fine and doesn’t worry about the details.”

“I take it you’re someone who worries about the details?”

“Yes.” She smiled. “You’d think we might balance each other out but in reality we drive each other crazy.”

Lizzie tilted her head. “Was your marriage happy?”

“I’m not sure,” she mused. “On the surface it was, but …” She trailed off, unsure how to explain.

“What happened for you to break up?”

Amy chuckled. “That’s another long story and I think I’ve probably offloaded on you enough for one day.” She looked gratefully at Lizzie. “I don’t usually tell my life story to people I’ve just met.” In fact, that was probably the most open she’d been with anyone in a long time.

“It’s good to get to know people if you’re going to be working with them.” Lizzie’s eyes sparkled as her lips spread to a hopeful grin. “That’s if you still want to work with us. I know it’s just a voluntary thing, but we were excited about having another voice to weigh in. Emily, Scarlett and I know each other so well that we can usually predict what the others will say when it comes to business decisions and ideas.”

“I suppose this would be a good time for me to be honest with you.” Amy inwardly cringed. “I wasn’t especially looking to get experience in a publishing company … all I was looking for was a vaguely believable reason to spend the summer here.”

“It was so you could keep an eye on the boys?” Lizzie asked.

“That’s exactly what Damian thought. He thinks I don’t trust him to look after them.”

“Is it true?”

She tipped her head from one shoulder to the other while she figured out how to respond. “Maybe it was part of the reason. But I also couldn’t face spending the summer at home on my own. Coming home from work to an empty house every day really wouldn’t be good for me at the moment.” There was also more to it than that, but she didn’t like to dwell too much on her other reason for being there … that even the idea of spending time with Damian again felt like a breath of fresh air.

“It sounds as though you need a holiday. Why don’t you spend a bit of time relaxing and exploring? Then, if you feel like checking out what we’re up to with the publishing stuff, you’re very welcome to.”

“That sounds good.” Amy dropped her head to her hands. “I told Damian it was a paid thing.”

“We can’t really afford to pay you, I’m afraid … though we also weren’t really planning on putting you to work, just showing you how we do things and maybe giving you a couple of tasks if there was something that interested you.”

“It sounds great. And I wasn’t hinting that you should pay me … I was actually wondering if you could just not mention to Damian that it’s a voluntary position that I pretty much begged for. I really want him to think there’s an actual reason for me to be here other than checking up on him.”

“That’s fine. I don’t think any of us would have mentioned it anyway.”

“Thank you. It would be interesting to learn about your business.” The fact that Lizzie and Emily seemed lovely made it more appealing. “It’s going to be awkward with Scarlett though, I suppose.”

“It’ll be fine. But like I say, take some time to have a holiday.”

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