Page 76 of Riding the Waves

“I don’t care if you needed it. The only way I was a father to them was through financial support.” He glared at her. “But you even took that away from me.”

The kitchen door banged behind him when he went inside. Hurriedly, Amy followed but only caught him storming out of the front door. This time, he didn’t stop to ask if it was okay to leave the boys with her.

CHAPTER 38

Damian’s blood pulsed violently through his veins as he made a quick exit. He should have stopped to get Billy and Marty to come with him, but he just couldn’t stand to be around Amy a moment longer. On autopilot, he turned down the lane and headed for the shack.

At the end of the car park his gaze travelled along the beach, checking his business from afar. Callie was chatting to a young couple by the paddle boards and Jared was there too – rinsing off wetsuits. They didn’t need Damian to interfere. Besides, he didn’t trust himself not to bite someone’s head off. He turned left onto the coastal path.

Walking along the cliffs was usually a good way to clear his head, but his thoughts whirred frantically. He’d never cared about his time sleeping in the van. Especially since it was always interspersed with stints back at the house. Only when the weather was bad had it felt like an inconvenience, but if the bad weather persisted too long he stayed with Hugh.

The thought of providing for Billy and Marty had always outweighed any inconvenience. Except all his scraping around to get money had been for nothing. It had always felt like a decent amount to him, but Amy and Anthony had probably rolled their eyes at his measly contribution. Once again, Anthony had outdone him in the role of father.

A dog barrelled past him on the path and he stepped aside to avoid collision. The interruption to his thoughts made him stop and look out over the sea. The rugged coastline with the churning white water around the rocks calmed him a little.

As his heart rate settled, his anger subsided, leaving him with the crushing realisation that he’d never be enough. Even without Anthony in the picture, he’d never be enough for Amy.

Sucking in a lungful of salty air, he continued along the path at a slower pace. In a week and a half, Amy and the boys would be back in Oxford. The thought was as comforting as it was terrifying. Having a quiet house again would be depressing and he’d miss the boys. Amy too. But what he wouldn’t miss was the daily reminder of what his life could have been if he hadn’t panicked all those years ago and left Amy alone.

Since he’d almost reached Hope Cove he decided to loop back through the village and walk back along the roads. On the steep slope of the path descending into the bay, he spotted Jack and Emily sitting on the harbour wall, eating a bag of chips.

“Don’t judge me,” Emily said, pointing her wooden fork at Damian as he approached. “Jack has already pointed out that it’s not even lunchtime yet, but we were passing the chippy and the smell set off a craving.”

“Just doing it for the little one, right?” Damian nodded at her enormous belly.

“Exactly.” She grinned widely and gave Jack’s arm a nudge. “See! Damian gets it.”

Chuckling, Jack slung an arm around her shoulders.

With a jolt, Damian was reminded of when Amy was pregnant and they were so full of hope and excitement. It felt like a lifetime ago.

“Any news on the plumber?” he asked Jack. “Do you know when Amy might be able to get back to the bungalow?”

“That sort of depends,” Jack replied.

“On what?”

Jack made a noise as though he was mulling it over. “When would you like it to be ready?”

It took a second for Damian to decipher the comment and he inwardly groaned. “It’s ready?” he asked, a bite to his words.

“It turned out to be an easy fix. Max and I managed it ourselves.”

“But you didn’t think to let Amy know?”

“There may have been a crossed wire somewhere about which of us was going to let her know.”

“Oh my god.” Damian blew out a breath.

“I know,” Jack said lightly. “We should ditch the property management gig and become professional matchmakers instead.”

“You didn’t mess with the plumbing, did you?”

“No.” Jack looked shocked enough by the suggestion that it was clearly the truth. “We draw the line at damaging property. We only thought that you two might need a little push together after we’d heard stories from Lizzie and Emily.”

“Great!” Damian uttered sarcastically. “Village gossip at its best.”

“It wasn’t a problem though,” Emily said, with a nervous edge to her voice. “Having Amy to stay for a couple of nights?”

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