Page 42 of First Time

I heaved a heavy sigh, thinking of my own single-family home in a much nicer town northwest of Boston. Brand new construction to my specifications. High-end everything to make for a greener and more comfortable life. The thought of Becky in my personal space sent a strange tingle through my chest, far from unpleasant—definitely addictive. I wanted to share it all with her.

How or why I’d come to that conclusion so quickly, I didn’t know. I didn’t believe in love at first—or third—sight. But Becky? She was purely sweet smiles with a humble spirit, perfectly submissive, and all woman in the best ways physically possible.

Fuck.

I groaned but, already feeling like a major stalker, gripped my steering wheel to keep from stroking myself through my slacks.

I needed to embedded her fully into my life. Fear of Stephen would keep her from meeting with me in public though, so what option did I have other than to check in on her at work now and then?

Something had to give because I was running out of patience—and feared another meltdown on Stephen’s part that would leave Becky a battered mess.

If she survived at all.

Chapter 18

Becky

Daniel continued to stop by every few days for a coffee and a quick chat. At least twice a week he showed up around my break time, and I lingered a few minutes to speak with him. I wanted to sit beside him and soak in his peaceful aura to steady my own, but I knew better.

Somehow, some way, Stephen would find out.

It didn’t help that he’d been declining after only a few days of doing well. He told me he’d spoken with the therapist twice but felt it was nothing but a waste of time. He claimed to have gone to an AA meeting.

I wasn’t sure I believed him.

He got in trouble again at work, and while I listened to his ranting about his asshole boss who was the real problem, I didn’t ask questions in an attempt to get to the truth of what had gone down.

Another week went by, and his complaints turned to the bills piling on the kitchen counter. My dry cunt once more became an issue. He called me names and degraded me while creating new content for that damned website he uploaded videos.

I had hoped that a taste of the kink club and seeing how other Doms behaved would have been a positive influence on Stephen, but his behavior didn’t change while sceneing. I wasn’t allowed a safeword since I ought to trust him to know my limits after being together for twelve years. It didn’t matter that I begged him for a break and didn’t climax for him.

Stephen didn’t stop until he was done.

I neared the end of my rope emotionally and finally reached out to Chantelle via text for advice. Doing so earned me a voicemail—an earful on leaving and starting over. She also mentioned Daniel the one time I called her in tears.

But the same as always, I calmed while on the phone with her, reasoned away Stephen’s actions, and focused on striving to better things for him, for us.

I couldn’t rid my mind of the memory of Daniel and his kind, dark eyes though. I dreamed of him touching me, kissing me, bringing me to climax again. Twice, I woke aroused and slipped quickly from bed before Stephen stirred.

Emotional exhaustion bruised the skin beneath my eyes more than Stephen ever had. I binged on ice cream and hot fudge. Gained almost five pounds the week after I learned Stephen had begun drinking again.

If he’d ever quit at all.

Good old Jack Daniels became his best friend as I spiraled into despair alongside him. I was a fading flower in the forgotten garden of life but couldn’t find the strength inside myself to leave the only life I knew. Atop Stephen’s manipulations to keep me by his side, I battled insecurity.

I stayed long after I should have escaped regardless of my inability to support myself.

A month after I climaxed for the first time from a mere brush of Daniel’s fingertips, Stephen lost his job.

I answered his call, having no clue about his mood.

“Take a bottle of JD to the playroom,” he hissed the order rather than returning my greeting. “I want you on your hands and knees, the booze between your spread thighs.”

I licked my suddenly dry lips as my stomach twisted. Adrenaline raced through my system, making me shake. He’d never held such venom in his voice, threatening danger that slid shivers down my spine. “W-What happened?”

“I lost my job, and we’re going to celebrate so I don’t get tempted to blow my goddamned brains all over the bedroom wall.”

Shit.

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