Page 40 of Forsaken Fate

“No,” I said. “It’s just everything out here is harder than I thought. That’s all. I’ll be all right. I just miss being around people who know me for real, you know? I miss the pack.”

“You’re too hard on yourself,” he said. “You’ve got to be the smartest one in all of your classes. Everyone’s gotta love you out there.”

I snorted. “I don’t know about that. Right now I feel pretty lost, Uncle Charlie.”

“Bagghh! I don’t believe it. You said that last year right before you graduated Summa Magna, whatever the fuck it was. You just keep doing what you’re doing. It’s gonna turn out all right.”

Was it? Could it? I wanted so badly to tell him where I really was, why I was really here. It would kill him. He’d try to stop me. Maybe a part of me wanted him to.

“Uncle Charlie,” I said. “I think I just need to remind myself of why I’m doing all of this.”

“You’re doing it because you deserve to get outta the hell hole we’ve got going on down here. You’re better than the rest of us is why. You don’t need to be here waiting for some rival pack to decide you’d be better off with them. You get to choose for yourself, Button. You get to build your own life. A better one. Away from shifter wars and heartache that has nothing to do with you.”

I played with a frayed thread on the blue bedspread. I knew when I said the next thing, Charlie wouldn’t like it. I couldn’t help it, though. I had just told him the first truth in a very long time. I was close to quitting. I didn’t know how much longer I could put up with Grayson and the lies.

“Charlie,” I started. “I want to try again. I want you to tell your mage friend that I need another potion. We’re close. I can feel it. He’s out there somewhere.”

Silence on the other end. Then Charlie must have put the phone very close to his face because I heard his breath.

“Button.”

“I mean it,” I said. “We have to keep trying.”

“It’s too dangerous,” Charlie said. “That’s dark magic, Button. You don’t need to be messing with that. It’s not what he would want.”

“I don’t believe that. There has to be a way to reach him. If he’s alive, he’s still fighting. I’ll never be able to live with myself if I haven’t tried everything. You said it yourself, the whole reason I’m out here busting my ass is for him ... or because of him. Because everyone wants me to find my own way out. I’m doing that. But I just can’t give up on him. Not yet.”

“It’s a bad idea,” Charlie said. “You need to focus on your future, not the past. What’s the use in dredging up shit and getting upset over things you can’t control? Things you can’t fix.”

But I was trying to fix it. Every lie I’d told in the last year was me trying to fix it because I was the only one who could.

“I can make my own decisions about that,” I said. “I need you to tell the mage I’m ready. I’m strong enough to handle it. Tomorrow. Will you?”

Charlie said something unintelligible.

“Please,” I said. “Please do it for me. You said you’d do anything for me, I need you to do this. Call your contact in the New York coven. Tell her I’m here. If you don’t…I can find my own way in, Charlie.”

“Button, no. You’ll get yourself killed or at least hurt real bad. I told you. It takes dark magic. Powerful stuff. If you don’t do it right…”

“So make sure I do it right. Because I’m going to do it no matter what. Okay? With or without your help. Tomorrow. Tell your mage to text me. I’ll be near Lake Bliss.”

“It doesn’t work that fast,” he said.

“Yes, it does.”

“What if she won’t see you? Or what if you get stuck in some hell dimension?”

“I’m not going to take no for an answer. Uncle Charlie, I still love him. That’s never going to change. If there’s a chance I can break through. A chance he can hear me, or sense me, you know he’ll keep fighting. He’ll try to get back to us.”

“Sheeeeit.”

I smiled. I’d won. He swore some more but I knew I could count on him. He might be the last person I could say that about.

“Thank you,” I said. “I love you. And I promise, I’ll try to find a weekend real soon to come down and visit.”

For once, I hoped I’d made a promise I could finally keep.

* * *

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