Page 16 of Forsaken Fate

“I’m not her!” It came out as a muffled yell into his hands. “I’m not her and I’m not him!”

“Who?”

“Fucking Theo!”

My heart beat a little faster as Grayson seemed to invoke my sin. He didn’t know. Couldn’t. But frayed as my own nerves were, I worried I might betray something in my eyes. Could Grayson scent Theo on me? He was still spell-drunk. God. It was getting worse. He’d taken too much tonight. He was so wrapped up in his own misery and paranoia, he couldn’t read mine.

“Theo has been the Golden Boy since forever. I guarantee you if he stood up and told that group that he was going to step into my mother’s seat, they would have all applauded him and started throwing cash at him.”

“Grayson,” I said, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder and for once, he let me. “You’re Diana’s son, not Theo. The people in this house tonight are loyal to her, aren’t they? You have the best of both bloodlines. Your mother’s mage roots and your father’s wolf line?”

Grayson jerked, throwing off my touch. “Do you think you’re being funny? Cute?”

“What? No.”

“My father is Theo Dorran Sr. He claimed me. People need to remember that.”

“I do remember that,” I said. “I didn’t mean anything by what I said. I just meant that you’re a wolf shifter too. That’s all.”

Grayson hated the mere mention of his biological father. He’d also been a beta wolf but one well placed and loyal to the fae during the war. Diana’s first marriage had been another political alliance. There were rumors about what happened to the man. None of them good. In hushed quarters, some said Diana had been the one to slit her first husband’s throat.

“Those assholes out there?” Grayson said. “They’re loyal to whoever they think can advance their own careers. I know what they think. They think I can’t make it without her.”

I was at the same party tonight. At no time did I hear or sense anyone in that room making that judgment. I knew this was Grayson’s insecurity talking. This was Diana’s fault but not in the way he thought. I had only seen the dynamic between the two of them for a few months, but it was enough. Diana took care of everything for Grayson to the point of him barely being able to do anything without her. In that way, she had taken something valuable away from him, too. When I ran my hand over the curve of his head, I had great empathy for what he must feel. She had taken so much from me, too.

Grayson turned to me and pulled me into his arms so tightly I almost couldn’t breathe. “Promise me you’ll stay with me,” he said into my hair. “Promise me you’ll help me.”

“Grayson ... I ....”

He fumbled with the front of my dress, pulling at the thin straps until one of them snapped. “God,” he said, driving me backwards on the bed. “I need you so much. I can’t wait. I don’t want to wait anymore!”

He was on top of me, pulling at my dress. Not now. I couldn’t be with him now. Not after what I’d done. Not ever.

“I can’t breathe,” I gasped. And I couldn’t. Grayson was wild and needy, meaning to use me to fuck away the ghost of his mother and his self-doubt. His wolf came to the surface. Yellow eyes. Fangs dropping. He could no longer contain it.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, though his voice was ragged. He seemed to be stuck mid-shift. His fingers had become claws. His snout grew long. “They’re all jealous. Every one of them wants to stick their shriveled-up dicks in you and I’m the only who gets to. You know I overheard that grease ball Abraham Padgett actually saying that to the mayor? Do you know who he is Brynna? Padgett is a rogue mage. He’s got connections to all the most powerful covens in New York. In the world! I need his backing. God, if it was as simple as letting him fuck you, I’d let him do it right there on the dining room table between courses.”

“Grayson.” He was nearly crushing me under him. “Stop! We must wait. If you want the power that will come from marking me, we have to wait until the Gathering!”

He let out a howl, arched his back, and shifted the rest of the way. Grayson’s wolf snorted and pawed at the ground. His yellow eyes flashed. He looked like he wanted to eat me. I couldn’t be sure if he could hear me anymore.

Fear prickled along my spine. Had I pushed him too far. Could he scent Theo now that he was in his wolf?

Grayson’s yellow eyes went in and out of focus. The effect of the magic he’d used made him sluggish. He took a lumbering step forward, then keeled over sideways. Still in his wolf, Grayson curled into a fetal position and started to snore, his tongue lolling to the side.

I froze, afraid to move, afraid to wake him. I waited one minute. Two. Five minutes went by and by the steady heave of his chest, I knew Grayson wasn’t going to wake up for hours. In his sleep, he shifted back to his human form. He was out cold.

I stood and watched him. Diana had wrecked him in so many ways. I could feel sorry for him. Almost.

I left him there, walking out of the bedroom I passed by Diana’s dresser again. The small teakwood jewelry box sat there. I thought of taking it with me. Hiding it. Giving it back to Theo. But Grayson might notice. Next to it, there were several empty glass vials. Those hadn’t been there before. I picked one up. It was hot to the touch, traces of whatever potion it once contained lingered. Its magic clung to me, swirling and dark. I brought the vial up to my nose and sniffed it. There were four more vials just like it. Grayson had downed them all.

I left Grayson alone, snoring in Diana’s suite and closed the door behind me. I took the guest bedroom down the hall and locked the door.

It was just as well because I needed space. I needed to think. I’d come so far but sometimes it got harder and harder to remember who the enemies still were. I was tired. So tired. And though I’d just left the man I was supposed to let claim me, it was Theo who invaded my thoughts.

I still felt his touch on my skin. It was careless, dangerous. What was I thinking? He had been so close, smelled so good and looked like delicious sin. And it had been raw and real, so much so that my legs still trembled from holding them around his waist for so long. I would be sore tomorrow because of it and a part of me relished it. Still, my heart pounded in my chest as the magnitude of what I had just risked started to sink in.

I looked at the clock on the wall. It was past midnight here, but just past ten back home.

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