Page 71 of Pause

“What is it?”

His voice cuts through the air. “You do realize there’s something majorly wrong with this picture, right? I mean, this moment is criminal on so many levels.”

“I have a feeling you’re about to tell me why.”

“I’m sitting in a private hot tub in Venice with a beautiful woman…in my bathing suit. I mean, I’m not even allowed to call myself a man anymore. The man card police called and revoked all privileges until further notice. My masculinity is officially stripped. I’m not worthy. But I love this. This is so fun. Did I mention what a great time I’m having? The best time ever.”

“Are you done?” I say, not bothering to hide my laughter. I’m done suppressing it. I’ll always encourage his brand of humor.

He folds his arms. “Stick a fork in me, I’m done. I’m not just done, I’m done and doner. I’ll never get my man card back. Just a notice in the mail saying REVOKED. Withdrawn. Never again, dude. No strike that. I can’t even be called a dude. Gentleman it is. I should be proud of myself, right? Can’t find that emotion. Don’t know where it is. I lost it somewhere between the bathroom and the hot tub. My walk of shame.”

I can’t even make a comment because I’m laughing so hard over his silly jokes. When I catch my breath, I reach out my legs and tangle them with his. But it’s really hard to be serious at the moment. “Is that better?” I’m still giggling, so a seductive voice eludes me. His ability to remain deadpan baffles me.

“I guess you could call me half a man now.”

I swim over to him and sit on his lap, my smiling lips hovering over his. “How about now?”

“I’m feeling more manly by the moment.”

I press my lips to his and kiss him softly, but the mood is ruined when I start laughing again. “Sorry. It’s your fault. Stop making me laugh.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He reaches up and buries his fingers in my hair, pulling me into a heated kiss. I start laughing a few times, but he simply kisses my smile away.

There’s no more mirth for quite some time after that.

When we finally part, I retreat to my side, but our legs remain tangled together, skin sliding against skin.

I think I might have cartoon hearts for eyes. So much love is burgeoning inside me for Slade. I’m a lit firecracker about to explode.

Slade takes a deep breath. “You know I was joking, right? I wasn’t trying to pressure you into anything.”

“No worries. I know.”

“This was a dumb idea.” Slade’s not joking anymore. There’s a certain lilt in his voice when he’s going off on a comedic tangent.

“Yeah. Too much romance is not good for Slade and Marin.”

“We didn’t think this through, did we?” His eyes are looking into mine so deeply, I swear he’s inside my head.

“No, we didn’t. Did I mention we’ve only known each other for two weeks?”

He moans. “That was equivalent to an ice-cold shower.”

I rub my foot on his leg. “Gotta say, you win the Best Date Ever award.”

“Until tomorrow,” Slade says flatly. “Everything changes tomorrow.” The mood changes abruptly as worry etches his features.

The real reason we’re here has taken over. It’s for the best. We don’t want to do something we’ll regret when our relationship is still so new.

And I don’t want to break my promise to myself.

He’s quiet for so long, I start to worry. “Slade? What are you thinking?”

“Wondering what I’m doing here. Seemed like such a good idea in the heat of the moment.”

I shake my head. “It’s still a good idea. Don’t spiral until something bad actually happens.”

“Thought I had nothing to lose. Wasn’t expecting so much hope to take me over, you know?” All at once, Slade looks emotionally and physically worn out.

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