Page 12 of Heart Thief

The longest night ever is finally over. I think I need a t-shirt announcing I survived it.

I’m not an engaged woman like I thought I’d be by night’s end. Instead, I’m a promised woman. To quote Ryker, the future looks bright.

Minus dancing. And humor. And passion. And any other form of spontaneity.

Whoa. Where’d that come from?

My eyebrows knit. Disillusionment is a sneaky little fellow. If I let him in, he’ll take over my mind.

I notice something strange on my driveway and go to investigate. It’s Ryker’s folder of important business papers, the one his mother gave him. It must’ve fallen off his lap when he exited the car.

I’ll get it to him tomorrow. I go back inside and toss the folder on my desk, my thoughts filled with Ryker and what our future will hold.

My phone rings and I grab it from my purse. I know who it will be.

“Hey, Mom.”

“Mila! How‘d it go? Should I start planning a wedding?”

My shoulders slump. “Not yet.”

I hear my mother release her breath over the airwaves. “What? But you were so sure.”

I hate dashing her hope. “He gave me a promise ring. He wants to wait to make it official until after his trip to Japan.”

“Oh... well, perhaps that’s a good idea. Maybe you both need some time apart to test the strength of your relationship.”

“Maybe.”

“Oh, Mila Are you terribly disappointed?”

“A little. I mean, he made it clear a proposal is still in the works. I guess I just... feel unsure of him now. The truth is, after tonight, it’s like my eyes have been opened and I’m having a few doubts.” There. I said it out loud. It’s real now.

“Listen, no one is perfect. If you’re looking for perfection, you’ll never find it. The trick is to find the person who is perfect for you, the person you love so much, you can overlook their faults—the person who will do the same for you. That’s love, true love, a love that will last. Always concentrate on the good, the reasons why you fell in love in the first place. Because the fact is, once you’re married, faults have a way of becoming huge, blinking neon signs outside your bedroom window that won’t let you sleep at night. You gotta close the curtains and ignore them.”

Now there’s a visual. “You’re right. If he can overlook my faults, I can do the same.”

“Yes, but at the same time, listen to your inner voice. If it’s telling you he’s not right for you, then you need to stand up and pay attention. There’s no reason to settle for something less than what you want simply because perfection doesn’t exist. Now is the time to question your decision. Once you’re married, it’s a little too late.”

I sigh. “I have three months to think it over, three months to be sure.”

“Yes, you do. Time has a way of helping you see things clearly. If it’s right, you’ll know it, Mila. Don’t force it. Just take it a day at a time.”

“Thanks, Mom. Love you. You still make everything right in my life. I don’t know how you do it.”

It’s like she kissed my scraped knee and all is right with the world now. I have a path forward and I shouldn’t spend my time worrying about it. I don’t have to decide right now.

I hate my misgivings. I was so sure and now that feeling is fading. “Sorry about upsetting your wedding plans.”

“The only time I want to plan a wedding is when my baby girl is doing her happy dance that I love so much, jumping up and down because her man makes her so giddy she can’t contain herself. That’s when I’ll plan a wedding to be proud of. Until that time, my subscription toBridal Guidewill be cancelled.”

Giddy? Am I giddy around Ryker?

Not really. He’s never made me feel like doing my happy dance. I can’t think of a time a man has ever made me feel that way. Is that really how love should feel? Fluttery and crazy, wild and dizzy, light-headed and unsteady?

It sounds so impulsive, so thoughtless, like you’re so wrapped up in emotion you can’t see straight.

Is that what I want? I’m not so sure. When it comes to a life partner, maybe I don’t know what I want.

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