Page 33 of The High Price Of Loneliness

I should drive there now and make him hear me out, her mind raced in desperation. She quickly changed clothes from the sexy black dress, putting everything neatly back in the hanger bags, and gathered all the elegant eveningwear, shoe bags, and boxes to return to Gray. Loaded with all the gorgeous designer wear, she grabbed her keys from the bowl by the front door and raced to her car, forgetting to lock up behind her. She would show him that she didn’t want his money. In an act of selflessness—she would give it all back to him just for one moment for him to hear her out. Her mind was racing a hundred miles per hour, thinking precisely what she should say. She had already rehearsed this a dozen times on the ride home from Tampa but never had the chance to speak.

It’s now or never. She clenched the steering wheel as she pressed on the gas in her sports car. The miles to Gray’s home clicked behind her as she raced to recapture her place with Edward. She ached inside. She had not realized how much she cared about him and how devastating it would feel to lose him—not his money or station, but Edward, the man.

Racing faster to Longboat Key, she said aloud, “I will make him see how I really feel.” She was determined to do whatever it would take to get him back. It was just that simple.

Angelica slowed down for the long ride out on Gulf of Mexico Drive as the local police were known for freely handing out speeding tickets for any amount over the limit. It was all she could do to drive this slowly, feeling her heart pounding. Her blood pumped hard as she finally pulled into Edward’s circular driveway.

The house was dark except for the outside floodlights. And there was no sign of the SUV in the circular drive. She had been watching for it on the only road out to Longboat Key to see if Taylor, his driver, was on his way back from dropping off Edward. Perhaps he was inside with all the lights off? Unlikely, she thought, but it was worth it to give the doorbell a try.

She opened her car door and got out of her convertible, gathering up all the shopping bags and boxes to present to Edward.Seeing her there returning all his generous giftswould be a surprise statement, she thought. She rang the bell and waited.

No answer.Oh no. What if Edward had his driver take him out for a drink or two? Crap, she had not thought of that until now.She rang the doorbell again. And then a third time.Surely, Edward would not have returned to the black-tie event in Tampa solo without her? Or would he?Her resolve returned, and she would wait for him no matter how long it took.

Her resolve would be tested for almost two hours.

Gray’s driver pulled into his circular drive just before midnight, carefully pulling in behind her red sports car. The entire front of Gray’s oceanfront estate was awash with the bright headlights of the SUV which revealed a crumpled figure sitting on the ground leaning back against his front door, surrounded by a pile of shopping bags and boxes.

“Good night, Taylor,” Gray’s voice came trailing through the night air. Then, slowly, and carefully, the SUV backed out of the drive and pulled away as Edward walked slowly and deliberately toward her.

“I waited for you,” Angelica’s voice cracked.

“Yes. I can see that,” he acknowledged without emotion.

“I just want you to hear me out,” she cried. “Can’t you at least do that for me, Edward?” she begged him adding one more, “Please?”

“Not tonight. I’ve had a few drinks,” he stated calmly. “And, as I said earlier, let’s talk in a few days,” Gray reminded her.

“I brought you all the dresses and shoes back to you to return. I don’t want them without you. It’s not your money that I care about, Edward. I’m scared. I’m scared of everything. Scared of going to your black-tie event tonight. Scared of talking to those rich and famous people. Scared of needing to fit in. But most of all, I’m scared of leaving here and never having this feeling again the rest of my whole life—the way I feel when I’m with you.”

She gulped for air—then exhaled deeply as the tears rolled down her cheek. Edward looked into her eyes as she looked up at him, still sitting on the ground in the pile of bags and boxes she brought to return to him as a sign, as an offering seeking grace.

Gray spoke calmly and firmly. “I saw what I saw with you and the ballplayer at the bar, Angelica. You let him put his hands on you, first on your hair and then all the way down your back,” he described with emphasis. “You seemed to be leaning into his advances and never pulled away. You certainly were not looking around the room for the date who brought you.”

“Just let me come inside and talk, Edward,” Angelica pleaded, still seated on the ground blocking his front door.

Gray turned from her and headed to the garage doors a few steps away, and she heard the words, “Not tonight.” Then, as Edward entered the side door by the garage, she listened to the click of the door locking behind him, and he was gone, once again.

Feeling defeated and rejected as she sat there, she rose to her feet, rang the doorbell, and knocked. Repeatedly. She called his name out loud through the door. “Edward, please,” she cried out. “I just want to talk,” she pleaded with the door. She continued over and over for more than a half hour with the occasional knock and doorbell, but to no avail. She surrendered to the iron will of the man she so wanted to win back.

She cried most of the way home but finally had nothing left. Exhausted, she climbed into bed and would not remember falling asleep, which she did—exhausted from the day.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

This Ends Now

Gray woke early, which was his habit, even after getting home late. Before making his morning coffee, he could not resist looking out the curtains of his large front windows to see if Angelica’s car was still there. Relief flowed through him to see it was gone. He opened the front door and was surprised to see all the Saks Fifth Avenue shopping bags and boxes sitting neatly on the ground just outside his door where Angelica had been sitting the night before. She had left them all behind.

Edward gathered the elegant bundles and brought them inside to a waiting white couch that welcomed them. Gray needed his coffee. He had drunk cognac at a downtown bar before coming home, which always made him sleep hard. As he drank in the smell of the coffee brewing, he replayed the scene at the black-tie gala, the ride home, and then the late-night pleading from Angelica.

He hated drama. Even worse, he hated letting his walls down and being vulnerable. Last night was a fresh reminder of what it could do to him if he allowed someone like Angelica completely inside the safe and sacred walls he had learned to build for himself. Everyone knows love can hurt, but Gray was excellent at building walls to keep people out or at least at a safe distance.

But he just couldn’t leave her alone. Angelica was already on his mind as he took his coffee outside to think. “Why can’t I just forget her already?” he criticized himself, even as he thought of calling her to wake her up and talk. Instead, Gray paced the length of the pool with his morning coffee. He wasn’t done yet, and against his better judgment, he simply could not wait for a couple of days to pass for him to cool down.

Angelica woke from a deep sleep to her phone ringing.What time is it?she thought to herself. She looked at the clock, and it was only half past five in the morning.Damn. Who would be calling at this hour?Then she saw the screen on her phone, and her eyes popped open wide.It’s him!she thought as she picked up her phone, just missing the call from Edward. She instantly hit redial and called him back immediately.

“Well, that was a quick return call,” Gray said condescendingly. He was clearly still in his defensive posture mode from the night prior. Angelica apologized in her still sleepy early morning voice and said, “Sorry I missed your call. I was still asleep and didn’t get to it in time.”

“If you still want to talk, I have decided to meet and listen, provided you agree to my terms,” Gray told her in a matter-of-fact tone.

---