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I studied his tight features before the truth slapped me in the face. The past few days… meaning since Rain and I hooked up. “You stayed here, in this job, for her.”

His green eyes flicked my way, annoyance simmering just below the surface, before darting elsewhere. With a grunt, he shoved off the wall, the single picture hanging near his head rattling with the force. Lowering onto the couch, he sighed and spread his arms out wide along the back. “I was over it all, ready to close the cases assigned to me and resign. Fuck knows what I planned to do after, but I knew I couldn’t keep doing this. Then she showed up, literally fell into me, and I knew I couldn’t leave. She was so fucking innocent, and….” He tipped his head back, sighing. “I couldn’t leave her unprotected. So, I stayed just a little longer. Which turned into too fucking long.”

Easing into the chair opposite him, I leaned forward, pressing my forearms onto my thighs. “You wouldn’t miss it? Not the shitty parts but the ones where we get that high of catching a suspect. Solving a case. Saving a life. Finding answers, putting together clues. That overshadows the bad—for me, at least. Knowing I can make a difference.”

His head popped up, and he leveled me with an intense stare, no doubt surprised by the passion in my voice. Because Iwaspassionate about our roles in keeping others safe. Sure, our job was challenging and shitty, but we helped people. From what I’d seen over the past few days, Slade was one of the good ones who cared, and he was a damn good detective. So yeah, I didn’t understand why he’d easily toss it all away just because some parts weren’t ideal.

“I’d miss some of it.” I flicked my gaze to where his hand now massaged his right knee. “It just feels like the reason I got into this after being sidelined from football isn’t there anymore.”

“And that was what?”

He paused, gaze going unfocused as he stared at the ink on his hands. “I wanted to make a difference. For too long, I was entertainment. Sure, I was good, but it didn’t mean anything. But for a while now, it’s felt like I’m chasing my ass, always one step behind the bastards intent on hurting others. I’m an offensive-minded guy, and I’ve been stuck playing in a defensive role for way too fucking long.”

I canted my head, considering that analogy. It didn’t resonate with me because I enjoyed solving puzzles, but it clearly did with him.

“Even though a three-week vacation sounds nice,” I started, picking an invisible piece of lint off my slacks, “I was going to say that one way to ease some of that stress weighing you down is to stop fighting your feelings for Rain, but you went and took it to a whole deeper level.” His startled, barked chuckle had me laughing along with him. Easing back against the chair, I studied Slade. “I’m not kidding. You’re draining energy fighting it.”

He arched a brow and shook his head. “I’m fine on that front. Thanks, though, Mr. Matchmaker.”

“Really? I see the way you look at her and then the way it shifts to death glares when you look at me. That doesn’t seem fine.”

He huffed, rubbing at his jaw. “Am I jealous? Sure. Who wouldn’t be? But you’re better for her than I am. I’m good with it, even if it fucking sucks to see it all playing out in front of me.”

I glanced at my watch and groaned. Time to end this wasted day and get some much-needed rest. My cock twitched against my boxer briefs, thinking about another night of sleeping next to Rain. Each night since we’d pushed past the professional boundaries, I fell asleep with her tucked in my arms and woke up the same way. We hadn’t ventured past what she’s comfortable with, which was fine with me. I’d wait as long as she needed.

I sent a quick text to Rain, letting her know I was done for the day and packing up. She’d left a while ago, saying she needed to work out, that it helped her focus. Considering we were all grasping at straws to come up with any new ideas or leads on the case, I understood her frustration and the need to break through the ever-circling questions we couldn’t answer.

“Want to grab a beer?” I asked, standing with both arms high in the air as I stretched out my tight muscles. “There’s no reason to stick around here. All I’m doing is making myself more frustrated, which doesn’t help anyone.”

A flash of uncertainty crossed his face. “Rain coming?”

Hmm, was that hope in his tone?

I forced myself not to grin. The bastard had it fucking bad for her. He just needed to man up and tell her, make a damn move. That bullshit he told her the other night about staying friends wasn’t a lie, but I knew he wanted more. And more than a quick fuck. The way he looked at her wasn’t only heated with desire—there was a longing there, too, for something he’d never have.

And he wouldn’t if he kept being a dumbass and thinking he wasn’t good enough.

The image of Rain living her lonely existence with only dead people as conversation partners put me on edge. I could be there for her via phone, but she deserved to have someone supporting her here. And Slade needed to step up to the plate and be that man. That way, maybe the knot in my gut would go away knowing she’d be taken care of when I was gone.

Which I would be.

Even if every second with her made me wish otherwise.

“Bend?”

I shook my head, running a hand through my hair. “Sorry. Fuck, I need sleep. No, she’s not coming. Rain left earlier to work out. It’s just us.” He grunted and nodded his nonverbal acceptance to the invite. “Know a place close by?”

* * *

The roarof the packed bar seemed to skip a beat, coming to a sudden stop the moment Slade walked through the bar’s door behind me. Everyone’s eyes widened before jerking to either stare at their drinks or diving back into the conversation that abruptly paused at his entrance. Though I still felt some lingering curiosity.

“You don’t get out much, do you?” I joked over my shoulder as I moved around a server holding a tray full of drinks, heading toward an open high-top table. When two women beat me to it, claiming the table, I switched direction for two empty barstools at the end of the large square-shaped bar.

“I don’t have much of a social life these days. Much to the tabloids’ dismay.”

I dragged my stool away from the bar, catching the bartender’s attention as I sat down. I pointed to the IPA on draft, then held up a single finger. The bartender dipped his chin and reached for a pint glass in the freezer. After the full, frosted glass landed on the polished wood in front of me, I gestured to Slade, giving him the opening to order.

“Bottled water. Make it three to save you time later.”

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