Page 60 of Awakening the Sheriff

“Byron…” I whispered. His words were ripping me open, leaving me bleeding.

I wanted nothing more than to tell him to go live with Mandy so he could see how much she was lying. But I couldn’t do it, couldn’t bring myself to say the words, and, ultimately, see him brokenhearted. I loved Byron too much to hurt him like that.

“How do we fix this? I don’t want to fight with you…”

“Nothing’s going to be fixed until we go back to Atlanta,” he replied, his voice bitter. “I won’t stop being angry until then.”

As he slammed the door behind him, I collapsed onto the couch, burying my face in my hands. The hurt and betrayal in Byron’s eyes broke me, shattering my heart into a million pieces. My son had called me selfish, a liar. I had failed him. If he believed that of me, that I was capable of that, I had failed as a father.

Was he right? Had I let my happiness come at the expense of his? My doubts resurfaced with a vengeance. If this would end up costing me my relationship with Byron, would it be worth it? The move to Forestville…and being with Auden. He could make me happy, that I didn’t doubt, but what if the price for that happiness was the love of my son?

I wanted to call Auden. I stared at my phone, my finger hovering over Auden’s name in my contacts list. He had been such a rock for me throughout everything, offering support and understanding. I longed for the reassurance of his calm, steady demeanor. He had a way of making me feel better, of helping me sort through my emotions. But what if he saw me as a failure as a parent? Would he still want to be with me if he knew how fractured my relationship with Byron had become?

He was a father too and a damn good one at that. His girls adored him. Would he want me in their lives if he realized how badly I had fucked things up with my kids? How could I keep him close when my children seemed to be slipping through my fingers? I couldn’t bring myself to make the call.

That night, I lay in bed, staring at the shadows playing on the ceiling. My body was heavy with exhaustion, but sleep refused to come. The events of the day replayed in my mind like a broken record, each scene more painful than the last. I couldn’t shake the feeling I would never be able to make things right with Byron. He’d been so angry, so hurt. His sharp words had opened a chasm between us, one that might never be bridged.

My heart ached for Milton too. Would his sweet nature and sensitivity survive his brother’s taunting? Byron could be so cruel, even though he loved his little brother. He was lashing out, hurting whoever stepped into his path of destruction. But if he shattered Milton’s fragile heart, I might lose him too.

Then the tears came, and I couldn’t stop them. I turned onto my side, burying my face in the pillow to muffle them. My chest heaved with silent sobs, the pain in my heart overwhelming. Tears streamed down my cheeks, dampening the cool fabric of the pillowcase.

Slowly, my sobs subsided, exhaustion claiming me. My eyelids grew heavy, and I let the comforting blanket of sleep envelop me. But even in my dreams, I couldn’t find peace, trying to save both my kids from a flood…and ending up drowning myself.

21

AUDEN

My heart was racing, and my palms were sweaty as I stood in my living room while Violet and Dani were in the kitchen, making snacks for their movie night. Was it from excitement or nerves? Honestly, it could go either way, but it didn’t matter. I was about to tell my girls about Keaton, and I wasn’t afraid of their reactions. I expected a little resistance from Violet, but more because Keaton was their teacher than because he was a man. Well, I was about to find out.

With a deep breath, I called out, “Violet, Dani, can you come here and sit down for a moment?”

The two of them bounded into the living room. Dani’s short, curly blonde hair bounced with each step. She looked so much like her mom. It was uncanny. Violet was the spitting image of Marnin, with her dark hair and brown eyes. Funnily enough, no one had ever commented on it. Our families knew the truth, of course, but we’d never told anyone else.

“Is everything okay, Dad?” Violet asked as they settled on the couch.

“Everything’s fine. I just wanted to talk to you both about something important. You know Mr. Perry, right? Your English teacher?”

Dani nodded enthusiastically, a smile creeping across her face as if she sensed what was coming.

“Well, Mr. Perry and I are in a relationship. We’re dating.”

Dani leaped up and hugged me, shrieking with joy. “That’s awesome, Dad! I really like him.”

I hugged her back, my happy little girl. An eternal optimist, she brought sunshine into every room and brightened my life. “Thank you, sweetheart. I’m so glad to hear that.”

Violet, on the other hand, my rational girl who rarely did something without thinking it through first, looked at me with her head tilted. “Are you gay now?”

“I’m bisexual. But I didn’t know that until I met Keaton.”

“Wait, how is that possible?” Violet furrowed her brow. “How did you not know before?”

I scratched my beard, trying to find the right words. “I never felt attracted to another man before, so it never occurred to me. But when I met Keaton, things changed.”

“I didn’t know it worked like that.”

Violet wasn’t being rude. The deep thinking frown on her forehead told me she was genuinely trying to understand. She had an insatiable curiosity, always wanting to know every little detail. “I didn’t either. But it turns out sexuality is more fluid than I thought.”

“But you’re okay with it? You’re not, like, upset or whatever that you’re not straight?”

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