Page 50 of Awakening the Sheriff

I followed him into the kitchen, where he expertly operated the fancy coffee maker that cost more than I made in a month. By objective standards, Tiago was one of the most beautiful men on the planet. The dude was a world-famous supermodel, and while he’d cut down on his hours, he was still in tip-top shape. Longs legs, well-defined muscles, a six-pack I could only dream of, and that golden tan everyone wanted but that he’d come by naturally, courtesy of his Brazilian mother.

And yet he didn’t stir anything in me. Not even a twitch. Hell, if he asked me to make out, I’d burst out laughing and then turn him down. And not because I knew how much in love he was with Cas. The very idea of kissing him was… Ew, no. Like a brother.

With Marnin, it was the same. He wasn’t quite in Tiago’s league, but he was attractive enough, yet I couldn’t bear the thought of kissing him. What did that mean? Could I be bisexual if I hadn’t ever experienced attraction to any man except Keaton?

“Let’s sit,” Tiago said, and I followed him again, picking a spot on his comfy sofa.

He put my coffee down in front of me. “Do you want me to go so you and Marnin have some privacy?”

“No, it’s fine. I’d appreciate all input.”

They both sat as well. I fiddled with the edge of a throw pillow, searching for the right words. Now that I was here, I had no clue where to begin untangling the mess inside my head, the uncertainty that had taken root. Marnin and Tiago waited, giving me space to find my voice.

“Okay,” I finally blurted out, “I think…I might be attracted to a man.”

Marnin’s eyes widened, and Tiago’s jaw dropped. But they both recovered and exchanged knowing glances.

“Keaton?” Marnin asked, his voice gentle but unsurprised.

“Y-yeah. How’d you know?”

“He’s the only new person in your life. Plus, I thought it was interesting you invited him to sit with us when we had dinner the other day. You’re pretty protective of our friend group, eager to spend time with us.”

Apparently, I’d been more transparent than I’d realized. “I’m not sure if it’s attraction or a really deep friendship.”

Marnin frowned. “I’d consider us pretty close, and I doubt you’ve ever asked yourself that question over our friendship.”

I hadn’t planned on bringing this up, but if I was gonna come clean and be honest, I might as well address this too. “I thought we were close as well, but as soon as Tiago had a spare room available, you chose to stay here instead of with me.”

“Shit, you took that personally?”

“Kinda hard not to. All those years, you stayed with me when you were in town, even back when I was still married. We always had a spare room for you. But Tiago buys a fancy house—no offense to you, Tiago—and you switch to him. Just like that, without even an explanation. Yes, damn straight, I took that personally.”

Wow, that had come out much sharper than I had intended. Either that had hurt more than I’d realized, or I was projecting frustration over everything else onto this situation.

“I’m sorry.” Marnin looked as if I’d slapped him. “I’m a thoughtless bastard because I never even considered how it would come across to you.”

“Why’d you do it? We’ve been best friends since kindergarten… You did the most selfless thing for me anyone has ever done, something that will tie you forever to my family, but Tiago returns to town, and suddenly he’s your person? I know you guys have a history together, but I don’t understand what happened that you’d…”

…that you’d leave me like that.

The words had been on the tip of my tongue, but they were wrong. Marnin hadn’t left me. He’d done something inconsiderate, maybe, but that in itself was nothing new. I loved him to pieces, but he could be a selfish asshole. He knew it too. And knowing his background, how he’d basically raised himself because his father was a drunk bastard, I could understand how he’d become like that. No one had ever looked out for him, and he had a hard time doing that for others. The good news was that he always apologized when I called him out on it.

“Auden?” Marnin asked softly.

I swallowed. “I’m overreacting. Sorry. It hit a sore spot, is all.”

“He didn’t break up with you.” Tiago’s voice was warm and kind.

Goddammit, he’d always been way more perceptive than people gave him credit for. He’d probably picked up on my veiled reference to what Marnin had done as well. “I know.”

“He’s not Tricia.”

Jesus, was he trying to make me cry? Because I was awfully close to tears, my heart hurting.

“You’re still my best friend, Auden.” Marnin looked almost panicked, and despite everything, I smiled. He was so uncomfortable with emotional situations. They scared the shit out of him.

“I’m sorry for saying all that. I’m more messed up in my head than I realized.”

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