Page 17 of Awakening the Sheriff

“I’m so sorry. That must’ve been a hard hit for all of you if you were so close.”

“It was, but above all, for his parents. Have you ever been to the Forestville Falls Lodge?”

“When I did the job interview, I stayed there for a few days and explored the area before deciding to move here.”

“York’s parents own that.”

When I had met the lovely lady who ran the place, I’d gotten the impression of lingering sadness, that she was someone who’d been through a lot. This explained it. “As a parent, the idea of losing one of my kids is my worst nightmare. I don’t think I would ever get over that.”

Auden nodded. “Same. When I became a father, I understood so much more about their grief. Sure, we were devastated when he died, and we miss him, but it’s not at the same level as his parents. If something happened to one of my girls… God, my stomach turns sour even at the thought.”

“Do any of your friends have kids?”

Something passed over his face, but it disappeared so rapidly that I figured I had imagined it. “Tiago and Cas have only been dating a few months, and the others are single and always have been. I’m the only one who’s divorced.”

“Other than me.”

“Other than you.”

“Where did you and your ex meet?”

“High school. We started dating back then, so there never was anyone else for me.”

Ouch. That would’ve made the divorce even harder. “I’m sure that made splitting up a tough decision.”

He didn’t answer right away, running his right hand through his beard. “The decision to separate not so much, but coping with a sense of failure was. I thought I had it all, you know? A family, the job I’d always wanted…and then it all fell apart.”

He was being much more honest with me than I had expected, and my admiration for him grew. Most men I knew struggled with admitting their weaknesses, and here was this tough-looking guy, and he’d just flat-out confessed to feeling defeated. “Same. We’d been at odds for a long time when we made the decision, but it still hit me hard. I never thought I would be that guy.”

He nodded slowly, his blue-gray eyes focused on me. My stomach did a funny little jig, but I squashed it down. The man was straight and wanted friendship only, if even that. Maybe this was just him being kind toward a stranger, or was I more than that to him? As much as I’d like to think he wanted to be friends, the truth was that he’d invited me over out of pity, knowing I was new to town and struggling with my teenage delinquent son.

“Why are you guys looking so gloomy and sad?” Marnin asked, and I averted my gaze with a jerky move. Had he caught me staring at Auden?

“We were in a meeting of the divorced dads club. Be glad you’re not a member,” Auden quipped.

Tomás snorted. “We can all be glad for that. Not sure the world is ready for little Marnins.”

Laughter rang out around the table, but I caught a look between Marnin and Auden, who wasn’t laughing at all. What was that about?

“I love being in a relationship,” Tiago said with a look of pure adoration at Cas.

Marnin patted his shoulder. “Yeah, buddy, but you guys are still in the honeymoon phase. Give it time.”

Cas sat up straight, his face tightening.

I cringed. Did Marnin realize he was implying that they’d become unhappy down the line, would maybe come to regret being together?

“Don’t listen to him.” Auden sent a sharp look in Marnin’s direction. Phew, he’d picked up on that as well, then. “He’s a cynical grump.”

Ouch. Marnin leaned back in his chair and raised his arms, interlacing his fingers on the top of his head, and sighed. “He’s right. Just because I’m fucked up beyond repair and will never be in a relationship doesn’t mean there’s no hope for you two. You’re nauseatingly adorable together, which I’m sure is a good sign, so there’s that.”

He was going for self-deprecating humor, probably, but it came across as sad. Not sad as in him being a loser but because he seemed so unguarded and vulnerable in that moment. I knew nothing about his back story or why he would label himself fucked up, but it broke my heart a little. Everyone needed companionship and love, including cynical grumps.

“Thank you.” Cas relaxed again.

He was protective of Tiago, which was interesting. Cas was so much younger. Warmth bloomed inside me. How wonderful would it be to have someone to defend you like that, maybe even fight some battles for you? I had never had that. Mandy wasn’t the type to stand up for me, not even when we were still married. A critical person by nature, she’d always been more likely to choose sides against me, one of the many things that had killed my feelings for her.

The conversations picked back up, and for the rest of the meal, I listened and only contributed when someone asked me a direct question. The dynamic between these men was fascinating. Between Tomás and Tiago simmered a subtle tension, but also between Auden and Marnin. But it was buried underneath deep affection, genuine interest in each other, and a desire to connect. Whatever problems were brewing, my gut said they’d get resolved because they were all determined to make their friendship work.

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